Please help someone

GEEGEE8

Well done for asking for help and getting the dreaded SAO done x
You can get through this, nothing is impossible!
x

RuthnJasper

miserablemum wrote: »

I actually don't feel like eating, I tried to eat some bread and just gagged I think the stress has been building up for so long at has all come out today. It didn't help at the school gate this morning, the parents are doing a collection for the class teacher and I have not been able to contribute as they are putting £10 each in and as I walked past they were signing a card and the collector said rather loudly, it is only to be signed by those who have contributed

That gagging reflex is normal - it has happened to me - it's your body's reaction to the shock.

Ignore those sl4gs at the school gates - they're just vicious harpies. You sound like much more of a lady than them and at least you are brave enough to deal with the issues affecting you, instead of getting your kicks by sniping and taking cheap shots at people around them.

My little nephew (six yrs old) makes all his own thank you cards. I love receiving them, as I know he has put his own thought and effort into making them. I'd rather receive a child's handmade card with their own, simple, honest words of thanks inside than even a jewel-encrusted Faberge egg. Given the choice between a few paint-splodges with some basic heartfelt thanks from a child and a whizzy, glittery card with a few parent-dictated scrawls, I know which card I'd be putting up on my mantelpiece...!:j

One thing I did when first in trouble was to go on Ebay (or Amazon Used Books) and get a copy of the New Covent Garden Soup Co.'s original book (green cover, called "Book of Soups, ISBN 0-7522-0503-X) for @ £3. It's really full of great soup recipes and ideas. Veg., when in season, can be REALLY cheap (even when not on the bargain shelf), and you can also tie it in with other things (like using up Chrimble left-overs, or pumpkin soup around Hallowe'en). I do cheat by using stock cubes (shhh! don't tell !) but I have saved SO much money with these recipes. The results are delicious and I've tried vegetables I never thought I'd like. The most expensive soup I've made, to date, was Cream of Fennel, which worked out at £2.84 for six filling portions. I make the soup in bulk and then freeze it in portion-sized packs to defrost and use as and when (here's a link to Jasper's blog from 2007, where he 'discusses' the subject: http://jasper-thedogsblog.blogspot.com/2008/10/tuesday-14-august-2007.html). If I'm feeling hungry, the individual defrosted soup portions can then be 'beefed-up' with rice, pasta, beans, pulses, meat, bread - anything really - to make a really hearty and healthy meal. You can have any number of varieties and the only real limits are your own imagination! I don't work for the Soup Co., or anything, but I found this book helpful as I was concentrating on feeding Jasper first and was often having one meal of bread with a dab of ketchup per day until I tried out the soup route!

My little nephew also gets a lot of fun by planting some easy-to-grow vegetables, watering them, helping them to grow and then, finally, helping his mummy (my sis-in-law) to make tasty soup from the stuff he has helped to grow.

If you can't get hold of a second hand copy of the book (try http://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/offer-listing/075220503X/ref=sr_1_1_olp?ie=UTF8&s=gateway&qid=1278023086&sr=8-1&condition=used - some on there for @30p at the moment!) let me know and I'll PM you some of the basic recipes. :beer:

Good luck. x

Karmacat

Hello MM - I'm so sorry you're going through such a tough time. I mainly agree with the advice you've been offered, and definitely agree with encouraging you not to feel embarrassed - you might see people recently debt free on here (I finally got debt free a couple of months ago) but **everyone** is on here because they originally had debts.

About the recipes - have you had time/energy to look at the old style board on here yet? With respect to RuthnJasper, I don't think you need to buy a book - any expenditure like that is an extra - there are loads and loads of recipes on the net, and even on this forum, that are really lovely, and completely free once you're on the web.

The first focus is getting down your expenditure - which is everything from finding the best rate of interest for things, to reclaiming money (like PPI) to stopping some things. £200 for groceries can certainly be reduced. It takes a while to go through everything, but it really is worth it, it can easily add up to £100 a month, and that can pay your grocery bill!

Claiming everything you're entitled to is important, as well - and using childcare vouchers in the right way. I don't have kids, so I can't give you chapter and verse on that, but I know from Martin's work that most people don't benefit from them as much as they could.

Then look at extras - clickthroughs, surveys, writing reviews, selling stuff on ebay and amazon. Look at your local freecycle for things that you need - I got a fridge from there, when my old one broke down and I was due to move in a few months (and it was better than mine!). I also do mystery shopping - going out to do mystery shopping is probably impossible for you, because most of them insist that you don't have a child with you, but mystery shopping is also about sending emails and making phone calls - its not much, but it adds up.

Best of luck

GEEGEE8

Hope you're okay x

stephy110288

Hello.
I'm so sorry you are feeling rubbish, but I can honestly tell you through my own personal experiences today that this is the right place when you feel like that.
I cant help financially, but last night my parents found out about my debt (i'm only 22) and how i had lied to them for years about it. this morning when i woke up i couldnt get out of bed, wouldnt eat, called in sick for work and chain smoked. i put a thread on here much like yourself, just needin to talk to people who felt the same. people made me feel so much better i'm even considering going out of the house later! people said to me that its bad yeah, but now you're fixing it? you're on here to get help and sort your finances out so things can only get better surely? you are through the worst and this site will help you so much
as for the ppi- all it took was one letter for me and halifax refunded it knockin it off my balance. i recently got my credit card charges back from mbna, and that was just one letter and they sent me a cheque. follow the guides on here, its really worth just writing a few letters.
i hope u feel better soon xx

misscousinitt

Didn't want to read and run - just wanted to say ((((hugs))) and that these lovely people have given you some sound advice.

Keep your chin up, keep posting and best of luck...xxx

climbintheladderouttadebt

Hi Miserablemum,

I just wanted to post my support to you on here. When my daughter was 1, we hit a terrible time in many ways. We survived on just a few £ per week, I dropped about 2 dress sizes and my mental health really suffered. I am now dealing with my debts in a way that suits me, I have met a lovely man, and my life could not be more different than what it was 2 years ago.

I can see that you have had lots of fantastic support and advice already and I can't really add anything else helpful, but I shall be following this thread and will post any ideas I may have.

One thing has just popped into my head - would she enjoy making some birthday cakes (fairy cakes) with you for her birthday? It's a great way to have fun, spend time together, and is obviously quite low-cost. Pkus they're so yummy to eat together afterwards!

Hugs

climbintheladderouttadebt

stephy110288 wrote: »

Hello.
I'm so sorry you are feeling rubbish, but I can honestly tell you through my own personal experiences today that this is the right place when you feel like that.
I cant help financially, but last night my parents found out about my debt (i'm only 22) and how i had lied to them for years about it. this morning when i woke up i couldnt get out of bed, wouldnt eat, called in sick for work and chain smoked. i put a thread on here much like yourself, just needin to talk to people who felt the same. people made me feel so much better i'm even considering going out of the house later! people said to me that its bad yeah, but now you're fixing it? you're on here to get help and sort your finances out so things can only get better surely? you are through the worst and this site will help you so much
as for the ppi- all it took was one letter for me and halifax refunded it knockin it off my balance. i recently got my credit card charges back from mbna, and that was just one letter and they sent me a cheque. follow the guides on here, its really worth just writing a few letters.
i hope u feel better soon xx

Hi stephy110288, I was following your post earlier today, I am so glad to see you feeling more positive and spreading the good vibes. Keep smiling!

livewire600

would extending the term on your mortgage be a short term option to bring your monthly payments down for a period of time?

Snowy_Owl

miserable mum - my heart sank for you when I read that comment about the mums at the school gate. I am a teacher and we honestly don't expect anything - the biggest thing is when a kid or a relative says thank you! The two things that made me smile on Thurs the most was a "wanted" poster made by one of the twins, and a home-made card. These mums at the gate, trust me, yes you appreciate the thought, but don't forget, they are doing it partly to show off in front of other parents. It happens all over I'm afraid to say...............

I've been supporting my other half through all this and really feel for you just now. DMP's whatever the amount they help you jiggle about can help take the sting out of the tail.....

Snowy xx