Please help someone

miserablemum

Hi I have just joined, I am in a state and cannot see a way out.

I have been crying for days and not sure I can do this anymore.

My outgoings are £1636 per month and income is £1691.

I have no late payments and up to date with mortage, secured loan etc but cannot afford the basics such as food and petrol, I need my car for work. I have to sell things on Ebay such to feed myself and my daughter. I am a single mum.

I am so down I cannot see a way out, I have contacted CCCS but my highest payments are my mortgage and a secured loan, they can help with unsecured debts but it only reduces my outgoings by £150.

I do have equity in my house but not a high enough income to remortgage, I can't take a mortgage holiday as I have a secured loan against the property so they will not allow it.

If I can sell my house, it has been on the market two years I would pay my debts but will be left with nothing and my outgoings will not be much less as rents are so high.

I cannot see a way out and feel so suicidal, if it was not for my daughter I would not be here.

I can't tell anybody as I am so embarassed and I only have parents who live in a one bedroom council house and are on a pensions.

I really don't want to be here anymore.

Johnhowell

Please hold on Miserablemum.

There are lots of friendly helpful people here to give you lots of support and advise. Please read some of the other posts further down the page and start thinking about the numbers for filling in a Statement of Affairs. Someone will point you in the right direction for this.

When you have this information, more specific/detailed advice can be given.

Anyway, well done for posting here in the first place, that is the biggest step over with... :-)

John

Tixy

Hi and a big welcome.

Well done for posting, I'm sorry you are feeling so down at the moment and feeling like there is no way out.
One thing I can tell you is there will be some sort of solution, it may be a tough one it may not be, but there are no problems that can't be solved.

Try to take some postive steps and try to think positively. At the moment you are up to date with things which is good, but as you know you do need to ensure you have enough money for food and things for you and your daughter.

I'm sure we can come up with some suggestions if we know a little more. Could you post up a statement of affairs on here so we can see a bit more info.
Have a read of this https://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/discussion/107280
and then use this link to create a statement of affairs to post on here http://www.makesenseofcards.com/soacalc.html

Are you getting all the benefits you are entitled to for you and your daughter? do you get tax credits etc, can you get any other benefits? if you are not sure take a look at www.entitledto.co.uk

I know its easy to say and much harder to do but try not to be embarrassed about the situation you are in, many of us have been in bad situations and do understand but you have taken a great first step in posting on here.

saorsie

Hi MM

Didn't just want to read and run when you sound so desperate. Dry your tears, you are amongst friends now and have taken the hardest step by posting. There will be a way forward, it's just about finding it and the knowledgeable people on this site will help and support you all the way.

Money is only money at the end of the day and what's important is yourself and your daughter. Hold on in there and please consider ringing The Samaritans to talk through your suicidal thoughts, they are there 24/7

-s- x

miserablemum

Thank you for replying, I feel abit embarrassed to do a statement of affairs on a forum but will give it a go.

Om my way back from the school run this morning I was sat behind a lorry on the A46 considering driving at speed into the back of it which is why I came on here as I am so tired.

I receive CTC and WTC and CSA my daughters dad is very good and never missed payments.

Will try and do the statement of affairs now.

GeorgeUK

Hi MM, welcome to the forum.

When it comes to finances, there is always a solution. It may be a hard slog or not what you expect, but there is always a way to work through things like this so please no more talk of suicidal thoughts.

You may be in the dark and unable to see a way out, but at least now you can hear voices ahead saying they can see a light.

Tixy has provided you with a link to the SOA calculator. Try to make the information you give as accurate as possible - not what you think you should be spending, but what you are actually spending. If there are things like presents that you are unsure about budgeting for, just think how much you spent last year and split annual amounts by 12.

We'll be able to offer advice based on experience as well as giving you support.

There are lots of people here in debt so no need to feel foolish or useless about it. As for embarassed, take a look at my signature. You have been providing for your daughter and things have gotten out of control - that's not something to be embarassed about.

You've come to the right place and well done for posting. I know how hard that is but now you have started on the journey to becoming debt free.

Tixy

It does feel embarrassing writing it all down but most of us have done them at some point and remember we are not here to judge you, just to try to help (plus its not like you have to face any of us in the person!)

As others have posted these suicidal thoughts need dealing with, and the samaritans is a very useful number to have, maybe it would also be worth talking to your GP about how you are feeling. But at other times if you just need to talk you will find there is always someone about on this board day and night to talk to or to lift your spirits in some way.

Take care.

fatbelly

miserablemum wrote: »

My outgoings are £1636 per month and income is £1691.

I am so down I cannot see a way out, I have contacted CCCS but my highest payments are my mortgage and a secured loan, they can help with unsecured debts but it only reduces my outgoings by £150.

Well then your income would be £1691 and your outgoings £1486.

That sounds good to me - you should probably go with them - but maybe I'm missing something - we'll have a look at your SoA when you post it

pondskater_2

Hi Miserablemum
You should be proud of the fact that you have managed to keep up with all your payments and also that you have the gift of a beautiful daughter who loves and needs you.
Remember that we are all anonymous on this site and that there are helpful, non-judgementel people on here just waiting to advise you of the best way to deal with this situation.
Good luck and stick with us.

miserablemum

Statement of Affairs and Personal Balance Sheet
Household Information
Number of adults in household........... 1
Number of children in household......... 1
Number of cars owned.................... 1
Monthly Income Details
Monthly income after tax................ 830
Partners monthly income after tax....... 0
Benefits................................ 580
Other income............................ 280
Total monthly income.................... 1690
Monthly Expense Details
Mortgage................................ 387
Secured/HP loan repayments.............. 257
Rent.................................... 0
Management charge (leasehold property).. 0
Council tax............................. 82
Electricity............................. 21
Gas..................................... 21
Oil..................................... 0
Water rates............................. 20
Telephone (land line)................... 20
Mobile phone............................ 25
TV Licence.............................. 12
Satellite/Cable TV...................... 0
Internet Services....................... 15
Groceries etc. ......................... 200
Clothing................................ 0
Petrol/diesel........................... 70
Road tax................................ 12.5
Car Insurance........................... 28
Car maintenance (including MOT)......... 10
Car parking............................. 0
Other travel............................ 0
Childcare/nursery....................... 160
Other child related expenses............ 0
Medical (prescriptions, dentist etc).... 0
Pet insurance/vet bills................. 0
Buildings insurance..................... 6.25
Contents insurance...................... 5.65
Life assurance ......................... 6
Other insurance......................... 0
Presents (birthday, christmas etc)...... 0
Haircuts................................ 0
Entertainment........................... 12.99
Holiday................................. 0
Emergency fund.......................... 0
Total monthly expenses.................. 1371.39

Assets
Cash.................................... 0
House value (Gross)..................... 125000
Shares and bonds........................ 0
Car(s).................................. 2500
Other assets............................ 0
Total Assets............................ 127500

Secured & HP Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Mortgage...................... 68000....(387)......5.99
Secured Debt.................. 25000....(257)......11.04
Total secured & HP debts...... 93000.....-.........-
Unsecured Debts
Description....................Debt......Monthly...APR
Credit Card....................12000.....233.9.....16
Credit Card....................4200......103.......16
Next...........................540.......54........18
DFS............................400.......40........0
Total unsecured debts..........17140.....430.9.....-

Monthly Budget Summary
Total monthly income.................... 1,690
Expenses (including HP & secured debts). 1,371.39
Available for debt repayments........... 318.61
Monthly UNsecured debt repayments....... 430.9
Amount short for making debt repayments. -112.29
Personal Balance Sheet Summary
Total assets (things you own)........... 127,500
Total HP & Secured debt................. -93,000
Total Unsecured debt.................... -17,140
Net Assets.............................. 17,360

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UNHAPPY_2

hi miserablemum, wish you all the best in getting things sorted, there is some people here that will be able to give you great advice and they are very friendly here