Nursery School Day Trip-Am I being unfair?

consultant31

bylromarha wrote: »

So if the boy has a problem going to Reception every day in September...?

There is a difference - schooling is mandatory, day trips aren't!

patchwork_cat

If he isn't happy don't force him he is very young. You do need to make them do things they don't want to as they get older, but not trips yet. I would try and encourage him though and try not to worry he will be fine, will he be paired with a good friend, also might it be worth asking if he could go with a parent he knows. How on earth would a teacher decide which parent goes on the trip and which doesn't? Names in a hat?

thebaileys

Its not sour grapes, I realise that not all parents can go, there have been 3 trips so far, I went on the 1st one, I wasn't picked for the 2nd one however I did let him go as it was in normal nursery hours and he was looked after by his nursery teacher, so my mind was more at ease.

I have made it out to be fun, showed him the website and said all of his friends and some of his friends mammys and daddys will be there, and that there is not enough room on the bus for everyone.

At the end of the day I will not force him, I will just see how he feels about going.

I did mention a friends Mam going and he seemed to perk up!

choccymoose

OP with regards to your son saying he doesn't want to go can I tell you a story. I work with the early years age group and have been running a forest school project where I have been researching the impact of the forest school approach on children's levels of personal, social and emotional development in addition to their communication development.

The children selected for the project were chosen because they were at risk of not achieving in these areas! One little girl did not want to go as none of her social circle were invited (the reason this little girl is not achieving is because she is dominated by her social circle and does not speak out or try new things) we talked things through with her mum and sold the benefits to her, we said lets try the 1st day if she doesn't like it then she won't have to attend the next 5. Sure enough the 1st hour she was very quiet and stuck very closely to the member of staff with us. Then she discovered something that she was interested in a slope, she spent the next 3 hrs investigating this slope, laughing shouting and having fun. Over the past 4 weeks I have seen this quiet girl who was dominated by her friends, who did what they did and didn't speak to anyone other than her friends grow into a confident, knowledgeable girl, who now takes her turn to lead the play in the setting, stands up in front of the group to tell her story of her day in the woods. in the woods she is walking tightropes, building dens, storytelling, making elder beads and still investigating the slope although now we have climbing ropes to go up the steep bits and bin bags and water to slide faster down the slope, all ideas suggested by her and the other children present. The transformation is amazing, her mum was in tears yesterday, thanking us for the impact this project had had on her daughter and thanking us for encouraging her to let her daughter come with us.

I'm not saying force him into going put please don't let your anxieties cloud your judgment or his experience! I know its slightly different as in my case was a project of 6 days over 6 weeks rather than just one day but the positive impact on the child in my case was evident after just an hour and a half

I love my job

meeps

my son has a day trip with school next week, he is 6, and I have been on all the others. he wants me to go again, but I wouldn't be in charge of him, 4-6 kids from his class instead. I weighed up being near enough to see he is ok every now and again, with whether I can cope with 3 hours on a coach and the responsibilities involved, and I have been selfish and chosen not to do it. I will worry about him all day as technically it might be the furthest apart we have ever been, but I know the school and staff are fantastic, and have been before, so must be able to handle it and think its worth it.

our pre school tried to have a farm trip, but it would have been parents independently taking their own kids and meeting up, and was cancelled due to lack of people willing to commit to non refundable tickets in advance during dodgy weather.

Janepig

bylromarha wrote: »

They don't have to be CRB checked unless school policy says so. I'd say in this case it was unlikely if the trip has been organised this way and is next week. CRB checks are taking about 4 weeks at the moment.

CRB checks are a pointless piece of paper unless they are part of a rigourous child protection policy.

Hear hear! All it tells you is that someone hasn't been convicted of a particular offence up until the point when the check is made. IMO the need to have parent helpers CRB checked on a school trip is madness and honestly I wouldn't put up with it if it were a policy in DD/DS's school - "yes parents, you can come on the school trip, but we need to check that you're not a kiddy fiddler first". !!!!!!.

Thank goodness DD/DS's school doesn't subscribe to any of this, and even, shock horror, lets you take photos of the children while they're on said school trips!!

Jxx

meritaten

surely if a parent is available to go on a trip then that frees staff to look after the ones that havent got parents? sounds to me as if the nursery/school is booking the least amount of seats they can get away with!
fair play to my granddaughters school (and this has been the policy since MY kids went there) they ASK how many parents etc will be accompanying the children and book the transport accordingly. the parents then accommpany their OWN child/ren and the staff look after the others. sorry, but I wouldnt be happy to be allocated to someone ELSES child. I think this is wrong!

patchwork_cat

Agree about CRB checks, one problem that I have come across is the attitude - they have been CRB checked they are fine. No there is just nothing on them at the moment. It should not be used instead of a rigourous child protection policy . I have protested , as all parents were being told at local scout group that they needed to be crb checked even if they weren't helping. It was so any parent could be called on to take a car load of kids, but when I tackled them about it they said it is so we know all parents are safe! It is wrong on so many levels and I was made to feel that because I protested that I had a negative CRB check! (which I might add I don't)

They were happy to put children in cars, without parental consent, because the parents had been CRB checked, however they hadn't checked the parent's driving licence, insurance certificate, etc...

With regard to the OP's question think about birthday parties, when holding a party for little ones in an enclosed setting how many parents will stay behind with their children. I can remember parents staying behind at various parties until kids were past 8! Some will be a social thing, or too far to go home, but plenty it was because either they didn't want to leave their kids or kids didn't want parents to leave and this is both parties we hosted and attended, sometimes with uninvited younger siblings in tow, just to mess up costs, party bags etc. GRRR

property.advert

I wish my daughter could have the same childhood as I did. I was not wrapped in cotton wool, nor frightened by the Bogey Man or any such nonsense. I played outside all the time from a very young age and perhaps by 5/6 or so was taking the bus into town to go to school every day. Came home from the park after playing football when it was dark, or later ! Rode bikes without helmets and climbed trees.

Now there is danger at every corner. Kids grow obese because parents would rather they sit in front of the TV all day playing video games where they are at least safe, but fat.

I think you need to know who will supervise your child. You need their telephone number and they need yours. Batteries charged all around ! If your child has a friend whose parent is going, then can't your child team up and you'd know this person personally perhaps ?

I'm hoping I can find the courage to let my daughter grow up independent and take the risk (though minimised where possible) to make mistakes and face challenges. The alternative, to wrap her up in cotton wool and make sure that she never is put at risk will not educate her for the world at large.

When kids used to fall out of trees and break bones or sometimes die, I used to think (even from my own childhood) that it was natural selection and nature had just gotten rid of some of the stupid or weak as nature always intends, if we stay out of it and stop interfering but now it is my own small and rather precious child, it is hard to ignore all the rubbish we have been spoon fed over the last 30 years.

I'm looking here for inspiration http://www.frankfuredi.com/index.php/about/article/188/

Paranoid Parenting: 2nd edition
(Continuum Press: October 2008)
Publisher's description:
Ever since Frank Furedi has drawn attention to the issue of ‘paranoid parenting’ this problem has gained widespread recognition from mothers and fathers and policy makers. This new edition argues that if anything – in recent years parenting has become more paranoid.
Paranoid Parenting is an important book that shows how parental fears have been stoked and families harmed. It ought to be read by every sensible individual interested in regaining a sane viewpoint that advances children’s well being. If you want to understand why adults act like children and children act like adults, in short if you want to understand why raising children today is harder than ever before, read this book.
Every day there is a warning about your children. Everything is dangerous; cot, babysitters, school, supermarket and park. We are told that children’s health safety and welfare and constantly at risk. Based on sociological research as well as dozens of interviews, this book will bolster your confidence in your own judgments and enable you to bring up self-assured, imaginative, capable children.

DevilsAdvocate1

I think the nursery is being unfair. The nursery my children went to asked parents if they wanted to go on the trip or not. Everyone who wanted to go went. The few children who did not have their parents with them looked rather sad and forlorn for most of the day, even though they were allocated to their key worker. On each occasion I felt quite sorry for those children.

From your son's point of view, some of his friends will have their parent there. I think you were right to tell him you were not going because you don't want him to think that you are not there because you don't want to be. How will that make him feel?

To the person who asked if you go on day trips longer than 3 hours with your children - I am sure most parents do, but will take a pushchair with them so the child can have a rest. My youngest used to have a nap one afternoon a week right up until starting school. I always used to have his pushchair with me as it was the one opportunity I had to do some shopping.

D.