How much do your kids expect you to do for them?

ManOnTheMoon

dandy-candy wrote: »

Thankyou so much for all the replies and hugs - very appreciated at the moment! Yesterday I pulled him up on his college application and expected a raft of excuses but incredibly he just got on with it and even took the form up to his old head of year to fill in the reference bit! I took your advice and spoke to my husband last night about needing him to back me up and give a united front on the whole chores bit and he agreed and then sheepishly offered to make dinner last night so hopefully he is getting the hint too.

It's a start.

My girls started doing small things when they were young and have no hassle.

Maybe he should read this thread and see what other people's kids do? May make him realise he's underperforming a little.

elfen

I started doing things from about 7 or 8, there was 5 of us and mum has a bad back, arthritis in her hips and a dodgy knee, so we used to get given the hoover, a duster and polish and we managed. Learnt to cook at about 13 (I helped with chopping veg and peeling spuds) and I am now a pretty decent cook - I haven't given me or anyone else food poisoning yet and I'm making the Xmas cake for this year (and the mince pies and sausage rolls and anything else she lets me make)

My older sister and her wife, however...different story. Mum was laid up after having an op on her knee, and she had to get up and hobble to cook and put the washing on cos they wouldn't do a bloody thing. When I last went down, I had a go if she stood up for too long and ordered her to sit down.

Indie_Kid

I've been doing my own washing since I was about 17. My parents will sometimes do it and I will sometimes do theirs. (ie, if they only need one item washed, I'll do theirs with mine)

Fang_3

I don't expect my parents to do anything while I'm at home, but by god it doesn't stop my mother. If something isn't done exactly to her liking, she will re-do it. Seriously, she is the woman who would clean before the cleaner arrives.

We are completely poles apart in terms of cleaning though. Growing up my mother mothered me, but within a week of being at uni that had gone and we have very different cleaning ideas. For instance I prefer to wash pans up while they're still hot, because it's easier than waiting, takes half the time and I prefer food to cool down a little before I've eaten it. Whereas my parents will leave it, eat, and then wait and then clean up. Which makes no sense to me, but whatever. Also each month my mother deep cleans the house. It takes her an entire weekend and we're all banished from the house until she's done, and every single thing is washed. No cupboard is safe, no carpet unwashed.

For me it's more about having a clean and presentable house in case someone visits. It's that simple. Even if, as I did, you have everything done for you, you never forget always having a clean house that people would comment on. You might not realise the work that goes into keeping it like that, but you're grateful for it. I remember going to other people's houses as a kid and thinking that they were disgusting with their dirty carpets, filthy kitchens and a sure sign of laziness - plastic covers on the furniture. It doesn't take much to clean a chair or sofa for crying out loud.