Daffy's 'a nice cup of tea cheers you up' diary

Pippilongstocking

Oh how I'm missed you all xxxx

An empty house - well aside DD having 2 cello pals over for a sleepover - its empty of other 'adults' - phew! Lovely to see folk of course but the house is now needing a good sort out and a decent tidy up!

Pop the kettle on - off to catch up - cheery I've texted you

Cheery_Daff

Message received and understood, will synchronise diaries this end and get back to you! :j :j

Yes please to a cuppa - we're off to WI so will bring you a cake and some kind of savory snack

We missed you too! :j

Oh, and KC, I'm *still* the only one in our entire family to have ever been to university (kind of overcompensated - I've been there for, er, ten years now :rotfl: :rotfl:). Weird feeling isn't it? But I think most of my family don't really understand what I do either (not hat I have a huge understanding of what *they* do either of course! :rotfl:)

Pippilongstocking

Cheery_Daff wrote: »

Message received and understood, will synchronise diaries this end and get back to you! :j :j

Yes please to a cuppa - we're off to WI so will bring you a cake and some kind of savory snack

We missed you too! :j

Oh, and KC, I'm *still* the only one in our entire family to have ever been to university (kind of overcompensated - I've been there for, er, ten years now :rotfl: :rotfl:). Weird feeling isn't it? But I think most of my family don't really understand what I do either (not hat I have a huge understanding of what *they* do either of course! :rotfl:)

Great and great - no cake for me, savoury yum yum.

re uni - me too - my family find it odd as well - and the fact that I've been to uni - they somehow haven't dealt well with, like I've cheated somehow to have this type of life - our life isn't very affluent (i nearly wrote effulent..........we've plenty of that :rotfl:) but from the trip some of my family had up here, you'd think I'd sold my soul or something and brought my kids up differently to us - I don't really understand them sometimes.

My family have a real 'we don't do that' attitude - and a real - we can't do that attitude - I don't really know what to do to help change that for them? Maybe I have to accept it?

whoopzie bit of a divergence there

Lemon_Tree

i supose i'm lucky, i grew up in the South with northern parents so whilst at school there i was considered to be a second class citizen. We then moved up the the north where i noticed a cultural difference straight away, especially for women, and their expected careers and aspirations. Luckily throughout all this my parents were the type who thought we had the right to do anything we dreamed of doing. I think the most disappointing thing i did for my parents was to get into debt and unfortunatly so has my sister.

Karmacat

Its so complex, isn't it! Like LT, my parents had the attitude that I could do anything I wanted to - but that consisted of sending me to the library to look at careers brochures - and I was in the peak of my rebellious phase so nothing much happened. The only suggestion I ever got from them was to be a secretary.... and the other part of the equation is my mother's gut level working class anger - think of John Lennon's Working Class Hero song, and thats about it. I think actual physical hunger was part of the equation for her, for many years, so tho she wants us to be well off, there's a really confusing level of bitterness that anyone should be rich - I've been thinking a lot about this in relation to the matrix and to my trading, so scuse me for rambling - it just seems so mad that all that confusion is still operating.

However: I've made a vow to myself, after seeing the grabbit board: the next time Debenhams, Milletts and Hotter have a sale, I will be able to buy my capsule wardrobe - I've no intention of flashing money around, but I want some new clothes - so I'll just have to get the money

Cheery_Daff

Good decision KC! :T Great that you'll be getting your capsule wardrobe :T I must say I feel good after my little (miniscule!) spending spree the other day - sooooo nice to have a skirt and top and jeans that all fit! :j :j :j

Gosh, it's a minefield isn't it? I think there's lots of ambivalence, like LT said. My family have a kind of confused mix 'people like us don't do things like that' and 'you've got to get on so you don't end up like us'. Everyone was very excited when I went to university - now they're asking whether I'm ever going to leave :rotfl:

There certainly wasn't an attitude of 'you can do whatever you want' - very much CAN'T do. IN fact, the last Christmas I went home, we had a conversation about dancing, strangely enough. There was some ballet on the tv, I said I'd love to be able to dance like that, and was promptly told I couldn't. I said I could do whatever I liked

And then the most amusing/depressing conversation ensued:

'you can't be an astronaut!'

'you can't be a ballet dancer!'

(and bizarrely) 'you can't be a physicist!'

and 'you can't be an elephant!' (from my cousin, who was about 9 at the time )

I did proceed to explain that no, I probably wasn't going to be able to go into space, but I could train up and go and work building rockets if I wanted to commit the time and energy And that I did in fact do several types of dance, and while I wasn't heading for the national ballet any time soon, there was no reason why I couldn't actually do some ballet. And why on earth can't I be a physicist?? I probably won't make it as an elephant, admittedly (except perhaps in a pantomime )

Haven't been home at Christmas since then And like you Pippi, I just don't know what to do to help them change that attitude It's most sad in my mum, she's *so* cheery, and been so beaten down by life.

However, this weekend she's at the Jersey Eisteddfodd competing with her Sign Language Choir and texted this morning to say she's being filmed for the BBC!! So she's learning :j :j

Right, no PhD done, but I'm all ready to trot off for a little underwear shopping - wish me luck! :j :j

Cheery_Daff

Humph.

I HATE bra shopping.

HATE it.

Debenhams is now on the list of Fiends with M&S :mad:

Back after I've demolished a risotto.

still no underwear

(well, no *new* underwear anyway! :rotfl:)

Pippilongstocking

Cheery_Daff wrote: »

Humph.

I HATE bra shopping.

HATE it.

Debenhams is now on the list of Fiends with M&S :mad:

Back after I've demolished a risotto.

still no underwear

(well, no *new* underwear anyway! :rotfl:)

Wanna watch eating rissoto in no underwear! Boo to no bras:rotfl:

Cheery_Daff

Don't worry, I'm wearing underwear (and clothes!) - it's just the old saggy stuff! And risotto's STILL not ready - darn potatoes!

Boo hiss indeed to no bras - but as usual, Mr Daffs to the rescue :j :j :j He's decided we're on Bra Quest, which has turned it into an exciting adventure, and he has far more patience and enthusiasm for this kind of thing than me! So we're having an evening of Bra Quest, and we will NOT be foiled!

Lemon_Tree

booo that you couldn't get the necessary over the shoulder boulder holders. I have that all the time and end up going online ordering about 20 in different sizes and returning all of them, once in a blue moon one fits and i buy 5 more! I'm back in search mode now as the problem with buying lots the same at the same time is that they all go at the same time.

though i was brought up that i could do anything i was also told there were a lot of things that i couldn't do. unfortunatly my mum is now telling my sisters kids the same things that they can't do but at least my sister is setting the score straight.