Do you ever wonder...?

JodyBPM

elvis86 wrote: »

F. As I say, I choose to do it so I can spend elsewhere, but in an ideal world it'd be nice to have more like £40 a week to spend on groceries (£80 for a couple).



/QUOTE]
£40 a WEEK would be massively OTT for a single person, and frankly is a huge budget for a couple! Including ALL luxuries I spend around £60 a week for a family of four, and we don't exactly eat dust bunnies! Included in that £60 is fresh meat, fresh veg, selection of cheeses, all the ingredients to cook any cake/muffin/cookie under the sun. We don't want for anything. And I have a lot of surplus in my budget I *could* spend, I just don't need to. £60 for 4 pays for everything I could want!

Oldernotwiser

Back on Topic.

OP, it sounds like the way you're planning it is spot on. Spend a year repaying your credit card and then get a bit of savings behind you and you'll feel more confident about starting a family together. Your husband's maintenance payments are obviously taking a chunk out of your income and this will be ongoing so that you want to make sure you can afford a normal life once you have children.

You sound as if you're in your late twenties so you have plenty of time to do this and perhaps even advance in your careers before having a family. Don't let anyone persuade you that children are cheap or that relying on state benefits is the way to go.

Good luck.

travelgran

To get back to the - OP. I'm a bit concerned about your comment that you might need to go back to 2 jobs each to fund the new member of the family. OK, that may just have been a throw-away comment, but the cost of children is not all in cash. It's time, time to care for them, love them, help them, enjoy them and be there for them.
Even with one full-time job that's a pressure.

PS That's not an anti-working mother point. I was one and was brought up by one, even back in the 'olden days'. (The forties and fifties actually! Yes, women did go out to work then!)

Bitsy_Beans

ellissa wrote: »

Here I am, sitting here on me lonesome whilst OH is at work (I'll be at work by the time he gets in) and I can't decide if the kind of people mentioned above are being irresponsible or we are being overcautious.

It's probably a little bit of both TBH. Some people will spend like no tomorrow, all on tick and then spent the rest of their lives juggling the minimum repayments. You mention feeling financially ready for having a baby. This will be different for everyone - what feels financially secure to you might be over cautious to the next one.

If your £5K debt was a loan that would be paid off then I'd worry less but I hate credit cards and would never have one again. I think you're doing the right thing paying that off before you have a child. Think about it though I couldn't afford to pay off £5K in a year so I actually think you're saving a heck of a lot of money to pay the debt off. I can imagine it's quite hard being financially responsible whilst viewing friends etc who are living the life you perhaps would like to be having (I don't mean materialistic but more free from financial responsibility). I think sometimes we need to remind oursleves of our goals - especially when we're wavering.

Why not check out the Oldstyle board - lots of lovely peeps over there and definately an air of make do and mend rather than a throwaway culture. Might pick up some tips on how to make your money go further etc.

peachyprice

ellissa wrote: »

OK so the couple on benefits get more than the other couple who work but I cannot understand how either makes the 'books balance'.

Imagine how much more money you would have if you earn the same as you do but didn't have to pay out for daily travel to work, work clothes, food at work, all the extras you pay for yourself for your lessons, it all costs. That's how the couple on benefits make the books balance.

sexki11en

pigpen wrote: »

In a years time you say you will have paid off your itty-bitty £5k of debt.. it takes 9 months to grow a baby.. here is no guarantee you will conceive immediately.. I'd start practising now!

This is very true. You may be lucky enough to fall right away, we thought we would, but 12 months later, here we are still trying desperately.

Babies don't cost all that much. They need a few clothes, food in their belly and a roof over their heads. They are, as someone else said, as expensive as you make them. I think it's a bit different once they get to toddler age, but for the first few years you should be able to manage on very little.

Only you can make the decision, but I wished to goodness I'd known it was going to take us this long - we'd have started trying years ago!

Good luck with whatever you decide.

SK x

delain

Move somewhere cheaper so you can have a lower mortgage.

MrsE_2

JodyBPM wrote: »

£40 a WEEK would be massively OTT for a single person, and frankly is a huge budget for a couple! Including ALL luxuries I spend around £60 a week for a family of four, and we don't exactly eat dust bunnies! Included in that £60 is fresh meat, fresh veg, selection of cheeses, all the ingredients to cook any cake/muffin/cookie under the sun. We don't want for anything. And I have a lot of surplus in my budget I *could* spend, I just don't need to. £60 for 4 pays for everything I could want!

I'm going to scan my shoppings lists in here!!!!

I spend at least £40 PP PW on "shopping". I popped into M&S last night & spent about £25 & then into Asda & spent about £35 (stocking up on some bargains - Kellogues fruit & fibre & stuff) & I havn't done my main weekly shop yet:eek:
I don't do that every week, but I happened to be in a Town that had both so I popped in to grab the M&S dine in deal & stock up on some offers in Asda (tuna, cereal, dried herbs & spices, etc).

I don't buy ready meals, I even bake my own bread.
How do others spend so little or are we just very greedy:o

delain

When I lived on my own I spent under £15 per week on food. But I did only eat weetabix and toast

M_A_R_I_E

I can relate to the OP.

I am a teacher too and we debated whether it was a good time or not to have children. We decided to go for it! When I returned to work after my mat leave i went back part time - reducing my wages by 50% EEK!!! We also decided that we wanted a bigger house as we would like another child! Therefore doubling our mortgage! EEK AGAIN!!!

That was 4-5 years ago! I am now still teaching part time with 2 beautiful children and living in a 4 bed detached house! We have no debts (other than mortgage and car loan) and live a comfortable life. Ok, we don't have any fancy holidays or meals out. Our children are happy and healthy. Eldest has swimming lessons, etc. Youngest goes tumbletots etc.

TBH I don't know what I used to spend my money on before i had children. You do have to be careful and budget for eveything. What I am trying to say is that it can be done and I know I am doing the best for my children whilst they are little and I will earn more money again when I return to work full time.

HTH in some way! Good luck x