How do you know when you are ready for a relationship?

studentphil

I do wish I could make the step sometimes from friend to boyfriend. I do get a bit feed up of all being just a friend.

lisa_75

studentphil wrote:

I do wish I could make the step sometimes from friend to boyfriend. I do get a bit feed up of all being just a friend.

What do you think stops you, Phil?

homersimpson_3

I feel mature enough at almost 21 to have a serious relationship. I would like some companionship. But yet as a student and no great funds I do not feel financially able enough to run a girlfriend as it were. But how do you know if you are ready for a proper relationship

Women are not cars but individuals who need to be respected and loved for who they are. if you made this comment around women alot would run a mile and regard you as very immature. you don't need alot of money to have a good time. there's more to a relationship than going clubbing, or picnics in a field or whatever. most people find partners through clubs, work, hobbies, college etc and relationships develop- you can't really plan ahead as such. often people start as friends and because they start to spend time with each other and feel more comfortable around each other the relationship deepens.

studentphil

What stops me is I am shy I supppose and I am not brave enough to move it past friends because it risks the friendship

homersimpson_3

What stops me is I am shy I supppose and I am not brave enough to move it past friends because it risks the friendship

in every relationship there are usually arguments/disagreements and all relationships carry the risk of getting hurt and the relationship ending. people can't get on or just move on and find new friends, move to a new area and promise to keep in touch but never do. sometimes you don't need to 'move it on'- the point is- it moves itself- it's not an object you move from a to b.

studentphil

homersimpson wrote:

in every relationship there are usually arguments/disagreements and all relationships carry the risk of getting hurt and the relationship ending. people can't get on or just move on and find new friends, move to a new area and promise to keep in touch but never do. sometimes you don't need to 'move it on'- the point is- it moves itself- it's not an object you move from a to b.

Bite the bullet is the answer

clarew

being friends initally isn't always a bad thing, my hubby and i were really good friends from 14yr-18yr. I was seeing someone else at the time, then we split up, i moved away to uni, and our friendship grew into love-was difficult to admit as we both were scared in case it didn't work/ruined the friendship, but unless you try, how do you know?

Here we are 10yrs later, married for 6years with 2 kids!

Good luck in your quest, mind you as with most things in life, when your looking, your not find it, and when your not, love will jump up and grab you!

homersimpson_3

being friends initally isn't always a bad thing, my hubby and i were really good friends.... and our friendship grew into love-was difficult to admit as we both were scared in case it didn't work/ruined the friendship, but unless you try, how do you know?....

neat summing up of alot (if not majority) of relationships

Good luck in your quest, mind you as with most things in life, when your looking, your not find it, and when your not, love will jump up and grab you

very true

studentphil

i am not brave enough to do theasking out, maybe it is because i have not met anyone good enough

lisa_75

studentphil wrote:

i am not brave enough to do theasking out, maybe it is because i have not met anyone good enough

Dont think of it as asking out. Would you worry about asking a male friend down the pub for a drink? Probably not, so treat your women friends the same and see what develops. Keep it casual and lighthearted. Drop a new film showing at the cinema into the conversation. If the girl shows an interest in the film ask her if she would like to go and see it with you, that kind of thing.