The cutting out/cutting down alcohol thread (part 7)

maman

honeybear wrote: »

Sim, angel, please take care of yourself. You can't change the past, what you've done etc & yes, it may come back up to haunt you. But people do move on from these things. Please don't let it drag you back down there

I don't know what may help you as regards staying sober etc, I guess everyone is different & has different triggers. Ulitmately I suppose being sober & staying alive & having a live is the trigger

I hope you find a way to get through this

xx

:wave::wave::wave:
or should that be
:santa2::santa2::santa2:

maman

Marru wrote: »

Hope everyone is well, popping quickly to update 19 for me please Sparkles:). In a process to get super organised :rotfl:Agency sent my CV to a job closer to BF, the job spec is ideal, they were interested enough to ask how much I am earning now, everything crossed...dashes off to tackle my filing :eek:

Good luck marru, they do sound interested, hope you hear from them very soon.

maman

fayjmck wrote: »

Just an idea chaps - I'm going to Shetland next week again (monday) for work, remember last year when I was up there we had our 'uk north/south/east/west AF night - fancy doing it again?

I can hold up the side for the the troops up in Shetland

Do explain fay, I don't remember last year.

I've been AF again tonight so

7AF please sparkles.

maman

Sim, can't think of anything profound to offer but sending you:grouphug:

skintscottishgirl

SimIsOnTheUp wrote: »

Hi NRA and everyone

Hope you're all good.

Thanks for the best wishes.

I'm not going to be able to do the taxi driving though, due to my medical history / 2 drink related offences - apparently, my Council will then contact my GP, and ask for my medical records.

The taxi company gave me a 'medical form', along with all the other forms (references / application for Private Hire license) on Friday.

The manager, had also given me the contact number of a GP, who would do the 'Medical' for £35 - After calling this GP (not my own GP), I was to take this medical form along with me, to the appointment.

The Doc would then sign / stamp the form, check my height / weight / blood pressure (literally a 15 minute job according to the taxi boss) and give me the all clear - I would then take the stamped form with me, to the Council.

Council then apply for a CRB, and then due to my past criminal record, the Council would then invite me in for a 'committee hearing' - where I can explain any mitigating circumstances / background at the time of the offences.

According to the manager of the taxi firm, my CRB past would pose no problem.

Having gone through the forms on Friday / Saturday myself though, my heart sank, as I won't be able to go for the job.

Firstly, I was going to be honest on the medical history form - however, when I saw the sections, asking about past 'alcohol misuse / dependency problems'.. the thought crossed my mind, to just not mention it, as the taxi boss had not even hinted that the independent GP would even bother contacting my own GP.

However, as the form also asks for my own GP's details, it seems highly likely that either the Council / Taxi firm appointed GP / the Council themselves would ask to see my medical notes from my own GP also.

To be sure, I checked the Council's website, and they state in their 'procedures PDF' on there, that if an applicant for a private hire licence, has 2 or more past convictions, which are 'alcohol related' (I have an 'In charge of a vehicle / excess alcohol' conviction from 1998 / a 'drunk and disorderly' Caution, from 2004) - then the Council "may" then ask for their own appointed GP to ask me to undergo a further medical / ask for my GP's medical notes on me (I would've given them my consent on said form).

So, while my 'previous' poses no threat to my application, per se, my medical history will.

Their 'terms and conditions' as it were, regarding granting a taxi license, specifically re 'alcohol offences', state that if there are two or more offences, then that would suggest a 'pattern', and that if alcoholism / alcohol misuse was shown on my medical notes, and I'd withheld this info on my form, then the license would obviously be revoked - I'd then not be able to re - apply for 12 months.

Although the thought crossed my mind, of not putting the booze info (or even my taking beta - blockers, for anxiety) down on the medical form (as I thought it'd be unlikely, the Council would even contact my own GP, if no 'conditions' were ticked on the form) I had a word with myself, as not only is this morally wrong, it is essentially pointless, potentially dangerous / illegal / just plain wrong in many ways.

So, yet again, I can not move on / forwards / even have a future, due to my f*ck up of a past which I've brought upon myself, due to my problems with booze / it's related convictions.

I also ran up numerous parking tickets (fixed penalty notice type), issued by the Council back in 2003 / 04 - I couldn't pay them off in time, and they were referred to the Magistrates Court - I can't even remember what the Court 'convicted me of' essentially - They wrote off some of the debt , and allowed me more time to repay them though.

The point is, the Council are bound to have this info on me still, and no doubt, due to the nature of my license application, the relevant department would flag this up - again, this would go against me, as it would shown I'd been reckless / irresponsible, with a car / parking tickets in the past.

One final, and far from trivial point, is that in 2006, I also got 'done' by the Council, for a Housing Benefit Overpayment.

I was 'Interviewed under Caution' (by the Council - no Police involved).

They "coded it fraudulent" (in the Council's own words), due to my having been working / studying / claiming Housing Benefit back then, and not having declared it to the Council. Would this have gone on my CRB info?

Again, 'benefit fraud' is on the list of no - no's, for them granting the taxi license.

This all dawned on me on Friday, combined with the fact that I blew £60 - 70 on booze, Friday afternoon / evening, which led me to spend most of Saturday, all of yesterday, and most of today in bed.
My head is f*cked, my body aches, and I feel sad. More than sad. Completely f*cking hopeless. That I've wasted my life, p*ssed so many people off, and f*cked up any opportunity that came my way.
I can't see any way out of this, and have no idea how on earth to bring this up with my (formerly prospective boss).

The Council's terms, also state that for "alcohol misuse", they need to see at least 12 months sobriety, and for "alcohol dependency", they need 5 years.

I don't think 3 days would cut it.

I really wanted this job, as I thought it'd be social / a way of getting out and about / driving again (I love, and miss driving), and if I'd put the hours in, fairly good money.

Now I can't even go for it. I'm starting to feel unemployable, and a complete f8cking waster p*sshead. I want to work, and don't know how to do it without my past screwing things up every time.

Gutted.

Cheers,

Sim.

Sim

Stop beating youreslf up,

I think you should just go for it and worry about what are only possibilities at the end of the day IF and when they occur.

So you apply for a licence and get knocked back - at least you tried and you can then try something else.

Or you get a taxi licence revoked at a later date, as before at least you tried.

Just go for it

Really

It's like lying on ones CV

people do it at their own risk but they still do it.

!st lot of bold you are taking it too far. It's not a moral issue to ly on an application form.

2nd lot of bold You can move on. People in worse states than yours do it every day.

This is the kind of thinking that starts you wanting to drink to escape yourself STOP IT Or i will be down there to clip you round the ear:D I would put a :rotfl:but i am not joking

3rd highlighted as before you are totally beating yourself up.

if your best friend said all of the above to you, how would you respond?

So

Try for the job, do your best, and if it doesn't happen then it doesn't happen. At least you tried.

If all else fails just stay sober, and enjoy your life.

End of lecture

Hope it was OK to say all this

XX

skintscottishgirl

SimIsOnTheUp wrote: »

Hiya 69chick.

Self - sabotage? Oh yes. You make perfect sense.

What can I say? I'm f*cked up in many and varied ways

There was / is more to this though, as the issue here is that my mistakes in the past have decided my future.

No matter what I do - even if I'm 101% honest about my medical history / the booze / the depression and anxiety / on top of the CRB, then the Council won't even consider granting me a license anyway!

On a lighter note, glad to hear you had a good night out Saturday night, and you were able to drink in moderation.

Cheers,

Sim x

This may come as a surprise to you Sim but everyone is totally f*cked up, it's part of being human.

As soon as you realise that you will be fine:D

XX

skintscottishgirl

peedie wrote: »

Hiya
just popping in to declare18 for me please
Having spent the weekend on the SOS Bus, (as a volunteer honest) Am still feeling disorientated. working days then 2 nights then back to the day job I forgot how it can mess you up, body clock and stuff. Spent most of the day trying to figure out what day it was.
Luckily there was no call for my rather rusty first aid skills-a few cuts and bruises but several sprained ankles due to trying to walk in stiletto heals worst for wear. This I can say I've NEVER done. Am 6 foot tall and have been since I was 13 years old, Think I must be getting old its comfort over style for me every time:A


Can I ask what does ETA mean. Been meaning to ask for some time,I keep reading it but the penny has not dropped yet, its driving just a tad bonkers trying to work it out.


Hope all is well and Tuesday will be good to everyone
Must go Peedie needs her sleep,

Nite nite
P

It means edited to add, like when you put something else in after you posted.:D

Though likely someone will ahve said that already:rotfl:

Lurkio

maman wrote: »

:wave::wave::wave:
or should that be
:santa2::santa2::santa2:

No. It shouldn't. :mad:



Another one for me please think its 4 now



eta: yes, its "edited to add" :A

jo1972

SimIsOnTheUp wrote: »

My head is f*cked, my body aches, and I feel sad. More than sad. Completely f*cking hopeless. That I've wasted my life, p*ssed so many people off, and f*cked up any opportunity that came my way. I can't see any way out of this.

Well, that sums me up pretty well too Sim. Hugs to you hun (((())))

HB, please don't disappear again

GG, yay :j so pleased to see you're 'back', if you get anywhere with the allergy thing, please let me know.

I royally fell off wagon last night....please see above comment from Sim

Pippilongstocking

jo1972 wrote: »

Well, that sums me up pretty well too Sim. Hugs to you hun (((())))

HB, please don't disappear again

GG, yay :j so pleased to see you're 'back', if you get anywhere with the allergy thing, please let me know.

I royally fell off wagon last night....please see above comment from Sim

Lassoo's Jo back up onto the wagon - glues her there with sellotape and sits on her.

Nice to see you GG, HB take care of yourself sweetie.

Sim, never really replied to you before, but today is a brand new day - I'll lassoo you as well if you like, mistakes are human.

Brand shiney new day chaps - onwards - Molls will be here soon to crack her whip.