I am a Bridezilla and my confession is....

Faith177

wannabemrs that last part of your post did make me laugh

we are having one of my exs as an usher but we were together when I was 17 (so quite a few years ago) and he currently lives with us and has been seen before OH moved in so he's practically part of the furniture.

I'm hoping she will be kind to you

stir_crazy

wannabemrs wrote: »

Only just starting planning, but already have one...

I wish OH hadn't picked his female best friend as his BM, she is his ex-GF and finds it funny to mention she 'had' him first, terrified it's going to make it in to the speech.

This would be my worst nightmare. My OH has a friend who thought it was funny to make "inside jokes" because they spent a drunken night together not long before he met me. She wanted to go to the stag weekend, OH put his foot down thankfully. She's coming to our wedding in the evening, which I can tolerate, but no way would she be allowed in the wedding party!

double_mummy

wannabemrs wrote: »

I wish OH hadn't picked his female best friend as his BM, she is his ex-GF and finds it funny to mention she 'had' him first, terrified it's going to make it in to the speech.

OMG i would kill him and would ban her from making a speech and from being in the building where the wedding is and in the county where you are

lisajane8482

wannabemrs wrote: »

I wish OH hadn't picked his female best friend as his BM, she is his ex-GF and finds it funny to mention she 'had' him first, terrified it's going to make it in to the speech.

Wow, I can imagine the conversation if my OH picked his ex for his BM, it would probably go the same way as the converstation we had the other day....

"I was thinking of inviting X to either the wedding or the evening doo"

My response "well if she's going I won't be"

X being the mother of his daughter who I hate with a passion as she says jump and he says how high and drops everything. He bends over backwards for her and I'm supposed to do the same.... Well if she actually treat me like a person I may well be inclined to but since she's a complete ***** I don't. Sorry turned in to a rant

I think wannabemrs you are a bigger person than I am.

wannabemrs

TBH I have got used to her, and thankfully not as prone to being all touchy with OH as she was when we first got together, one of our mututal friends had to take her aside and tell her to leave OH alone as I was looking like I was about to deck her

Sure it will be fine, but her sense of humour and what is appropriate is really different to mine...and OH has hardly any guests as it is, 65 are going to be invited, and 10 of them are his side, so can't really object to any of his...

jtr2803

I'm so upset, angry and frustrated today so please excuse my emotional rant!

If it was about my in laws or prospective guests I wouldn't allow myself to feel this way but its not, its my h2b thats really upset me. our wedding has been booked for best part of seven weeks and discussed and planned for longer than that. He officially proposed on holiday, but only after a conversation where I discovered he hadn't bought a ring and he then realised I thought he would do it while we were away.

We have been back for three weekends already, I didn't expect to go ring shopping the first one as we were both let lagged and had clothes to sort out etc. I thought he would suggest it last weekend, but he didn't. When I mentioned it last Saturday night he said I should have asked him to take me?!?! Err, no dear, you bloody well offer after everything thats happened and you promising me marriage for so long! I kept my cool and told him I didn't want to ask, it didn't feel right, he suggested we go the next day on Sunday but the one independent shop I want to visit is closed Sunday! I just joked not to make me wait too long.

So I stupidly assumed it would be today, and he hinted to that effect too. Its my mums birthday today and we are arranging a surprise get together this afternoon for her, I have told him all the plans and times so he knew what was going on, thinking he would suggest going this morning. So I'm sitting here on the verge of tears because nothing has been mentioned AGAIN and now there isnt enough time to go today. I am gutted, really gutted. To some it might not seem a big deal but those who know me from the waiting for a proposal thread will probably understand why.

So now I'm going to have to wait at least another week. This is the only thing he has had to do and he cant even manage it. I know he has the money so thats not the reason. I'm starting to think this reluctance is indicative of his entire feelings towards getting married and am wondering whether its such a good idea anymore.

Mojisola

jtr2803 wrote: »

So now I'm going to have to wait at least another week. This is the only thing he has had to do and he cant even manage it. I know he has the money so thats not the reason. I'm starting to think this reluctance is indicative of his entire feelings towards getting married and am wondering whether its such a good idea anymore.

How long have you been together? Is he like this about other things or just the wedding plans?

Brighton_belle

jtr2803 wrote: »

. I'm starting to think this reluctance is indicative of his entire feelings towards getting married and am wondering whether its such a good idea anymore.

No, it is indicative of his approach to life and he is unlikely to ever change based on experience so far. You are always going to haveto take charge I'm afraid, he is always going to be Mr Inertia.
I do understand how upsetting it is. But when we got engaged, I'll be honest, I hunted for my own ring. When I found it, I got him in the car to the place so he could confirm he liked it and he then just got his CC out, job done. I just knew he didn't have it in him to be any different. He showed zero interest in the wedding really until the day. He then wore the biggest happiest grin anyone had ever seen and radiated happiness.
Business back to usual the day after: I did all the thank you letters,lol etc. However, he loves being married. HTH jtr.

Mojisola

Brighton_belle wrote: »

No, it is indicative of his approach to life and he is unlikely to ever change based on experience so far. You are always going to haveto take charge I'm afraid, he is always going to be Mr Inertia.

And you're willing to do this for the next 50+ years?

What if you have health problems or a job that needs long hours, will you still have to do everything?

Brighton_belle

Hi Mosijola, not sure if your question was for me or jtr,lol. My comments re inertia was based on jtr's experience of her OH , not mine. I was just using the example of mine re wedding stuff- very shy of the public element of the wedding and a bit overwhekmed rather than the getting married, so i was happy to step in and he's totally worth it.