Stepdad turning nasty after Mum's death.

McKneff

If you really believe that "they even slept in different beds for over 10 years, so in effect the marriage was over" then you may be in for a shock in your old age.;)



My OH and i have been happily married for 42 years, i havent slept in the same bed for well over 10 years, we have twin beds. If we had slept in the same bed we would hve been divorced long before now, he tosses and turns, restless legs, fighting over the duvet, he would insist i kept pushing the duvet on to him, now i ask you who ever can push a duvet.:rotfl:
We both sleep much better apart, in the same room of course.
Aaahh the innocence of the young.

margaretclare

Many people sleep in different beds and remain happily-married, as has been said already. DH and I don't, but to give ourselves enough space to wriggle around and not disturb each other, we have a king-sized bed.

If your Mum was planning to leave him, why didn't she? Her first step should have been to make a will. Not having done so, her legal spouse is her next-of-kin. Unless she was supporting you financially - which doesn't seem the case - then under the rules of intestacy you don't come into the equation.

I really wouldn't be too wound-up about a bread-maker and a mixer!

Bereavement is a strange thing, it affects different people in different ways and it often causes us to get hung up on things that, in our more rational state, we'd regard as unimportant. I am sorry you've lost your Mum.

downshifted

I am sorry for the loss of your mum. Please try to forget about any monetary inheritance and focus on the love she gave you when she was here.

If your step dad is such a difficult person then you have no reason to have anything to do with him now - move on and cherish your memories

mrbrightside842

So is he also cutting out your half sister, his daughter?

shellsuit

I'm sorry about your Mum, but he was with your Mum for over 40 years ~ maybe this is his way of grieving?

I wouldn't argue the toss with him over a small amount of money like that, and I certainly wouldn't get would up over kitchen gadgets.

And think about it ~ he might dislike you as much as you dislike him and that is why he is behaving this way.

If there was no will, then there is nothing you can do ~ everything your Mum owned, is now his.

If things were that bad between them though, you would have thought she would have made a will?

valos_mummy

Sorry for your loss; although I would be inclined to agree with the others here especially as there was no will. However, a benefit thief is still a benefit thief - they are claiming money they have no right to. So if you believe he is claiming what he shouldn't be I would go ahead and shop him to the council myself. Not so much for "revenge" or "being petty" - it's taxpayer money he is claiming at the end of the day.

If he's offering clothes and shoes, then they would be a nice memento I think. Shoes would be nice to wear for special occasions if you have the same size feet.

woody01

Sorry but did i miss something?
If he was with her for over 40 years, did he not contribute to the house when a mortgage was being paid? If so, why do you believe you have rights over the estate?

jennihen

Quinny, I'm so sorry for loss. I hope you find comfort in supporting your sister in a way that would make your mum proud.
Having lost my mum last year, I can't tell you how great it is that my two sister's and I have seen each other through this.
I hope you manage to retrieve even a small momento of your mum or some photos.
Wishing you all the best
Jenni

Oldernotwiser

valos_mummy wrote: »

However, a benefit thief is still a benefit thief - they are claiming money they have no right to.
.

He is perfectly able to claim benefits with capital of 8,000,as he was when his wife was alive.

valos_mummy

OP did mention however, other benefits that he is claiming that she believes he has no right to.