Weezl and friends Phase 2 -giving it a whirl for Shirl! Testing meal plan for a month

Allegra

weezl74 wrote: »

What do I want. I want to feel secure in a team without anyone having to make a commitment to this.

I'm not sure I understand what you mean by this.

aless02

weezl can't type a long reply on my phone but don't discredit too much post baby hormonal whacks. I wish i were closer n could have u over for a cuppa. We all care about the project, but we care about u more.

More later...

artybear

At the moment I just want to give you a hug so have a dodgy one:grouphug:

Not really sure how I can help as I feel your feelings are very much tied into you being a perfectionist (which is no bad thing) but I really would like to take the panicy feeling away from you:(

I am impressed that you recognised you can be intense and dont want to do that to Fergie and Kester. I mean its ok if they dont so their A levels till they are 9:D

weezl74

Allegra wrote: »

I'm not sure I understand what you mean by this.

I hope it didn't sound too heavy!

I feel it's a big project and 'normally' (IRL) people would do something like this having some more solid sense of who was in it with them. If they worked together you'd know you'd see people tomorrow, or next week, or if we all volunteered for a charity we'd all meet up on a tuesday night or something...

With internet collaboration, it's lovely in that people can pop in and out as real life allows. This same lovely fluidity can also leave me feeling less 'togethered with' than is comfortable sometimes.

There is more strength in a we than an I.

So I am 'talking it up' as if we are a we.

But then I realise I am more of an I. (and rightly so! please no-one make any commitments to this, that would be wrong!)

weezl74

artybear wrote: »

I am impressed that you recognised you can be intense and dont want to do that to Fergie and Kester. I mean its ok if they dont so their A levels till they are 9:D

my main task as an intense mummy is to be intense in the right (helpful for them) way. Not to attempt to not be.(fruitless! although age will mellow me I'm sure).

I have a silly streak too. Which will help

SusanC_2

weezl74 wrote: »

Although factually very inaccurate it also asked if I was aware that I had a responsibility for children's well being and that it was shocking and irresponsible that I've put it out there.

I think you've put enough qualifiers on it with regard to the healthiness of the planner. Also (whilst not wanting to sound like Annabel Karmel) people do have responsibility as individuals and as parents to check/know things for themselves.

Loads of people publish recipes all the time without coming under this kind of scrutiny and I am sure it is down to the belief that if it costs so little it can't be healthy rather than a rational criticism. If someone can come along and say, "Look, I've analysed the plan for XYZ and there is not enough/too much." then fair enough but if it i is just the same old, "This must be unhealthy and bad just because it is cheap." then I don't think it is worth bothering with.

The internet is full of people who have got nothing better to do than spend time typing out ill informed criticism of other people. If people have genuine concerns about the health/nutrition aspect then they will approach in an appropriate manner. In my experience, shocking is used either to express extreme emotion by someone who is genuinely bothered (especially if they believe that constructive dialogue is not possible) or is used in a vicious way to be deliberately emotive. I find it hard to believe that someone who was genuinely shocked and concerned by something like this would choose such an antagonistic wording rather than something more constructive.

And that id my very long winded way of saying I think it was a troll.

weezl74 wrote: »

Is anyone still listening?

Yes.

weezl74

ps I also see big benefits to an online collaboration too! sorry if it sounds like I'm only seeing the negative, I'm not!:)

SusanC_2

weezl74 wrote: »

I feel it's a big project and 'normally' (IRL) people would do something like this having some more solid sense of who was in it with them. If they worked together you'd know you'd see people tomorrow, or next week, or if we all volunteered for a charity we'd all meet up on a tuesday night or something...

With internet collaboration, it's lovely in that people can pop in and out as real life allows. This same lovely fluidity can also leave me feeling less 'togethered with' than is comfortable sometimes.

There is more strength in a we than an I.

So I am 'talking it up' as if we are a we.

But then I realise I am more of an I. (and rightly so! please no-one make any commitments to this, that would be wrong!)

Would it help if people gave you more concrete commitmemnts on things they are already doing?

What I mean is like for example I'm tidying up the shopping list. If I said to you something like, "I will do it by x date" or, "I can't do it before y but should be able to do it the week after" would that be helpful?

It wouldn't mean anyone making any more commitment than they already have but might help by giving you a more concrete sense of how things are panning out.

Does that make sense?

And :grouphug:

taka

1st of all ((((hugs)))) to you Weezl. :grouphug:

You have created a beautiful, amazing website filled with nutritionally balanced, healthy foods that cost very little to make. You should be sooooooo proud of that. Even if you did nothing more to the site it is already an amazing resource that will save people £1000s of pounds.

Just remember that you can lead a horse to water but you can't force it to drink. Remember the statistics that someone posted (I think on the part 1 thread) - only a portion of people will be ready to follow your planner. Some, like your emailer, obviously think it can't possibly be possible (despite the evidence on your site!) and apparently without evidence to back themselves up. Either that or they have a rival website and don't want any competition!

That doen't mean there is anything wrong with what you are doing and inspiring us to help with - just that for reasons of their own its not right for them, right now. Maybe in a month, a year or whatever... it may just save them from financial ruin. Meanwhile it will help 1000s of others!

Although factually very inaccurate it also asked if I was aware that I had a responsibility for children's well being and that it was shocking and irresponsible that I've put it out there.

You don't have responsibility to anyone other than your family. A Shirley or Bob deciding to follow this planner (or even just part of it) has made a decision for THEIR family, just the same way they were responsible for them eating their previous meals. The responsibility lies with them at the end of the day, concerning what they feed themselves and their family...

You want this project to be perfect... The problem is I'm not sure that you will ever decide what perfect is! You need to find a happy balance between this project, your family and your sanity!

((((hugs)))) again!

It is a huge project and its come a massive way since it started only a few months ago!

Would it help if you did have more of a sense about who is helping you with this online?

poohbear59

weezl74 wrote: »

134 unique shirleys have now arrived to us via facebook (so this is people who never visited us due to MSE, so can't be lots of the pals off the parent club thread )

And we're just under 2000 unique shirleys now with 35,188 page hits.

Just to keep you all excited

:j:j:j:jWow, that is amazing!

weezl, having just read what you have written I do think although we are donkeys' years apart i nage we are very similar personality types.

I understand exactly where you are coming from in your feelings about criticism. I have been there myself. Also the media we work in now is so different to years ago where someone might have a thought about this plan, write a letter but then never get around to posting it.
We are all exposed to what other people think as soon as they think it as they can write it down post it and then regret it later. I know it is really hard but don't take it to heart and try to be positive and look at all the thousands of people who have visited the site and who like it.

You might remember me talking about how I set up a business with a few other people when my babe (fourth one) was just a few months old. It has helped not hindered my children that I was doing other things. I did it all from home as you are doing. I was there when they needed me. They all see the value of work and not one has ever said they are bored.

But I also know how much time all of this is taking up. I have set up websites in the past and I know that they take over your life. And you are doing all this for no financial gain for yourselves whatsoever. You deserve a knighthood! Can women get them? You know what I mean.

I am totally amazed and delighted by what you have done so far. My kids, cousins kids etc. are using your website. You are helping many families put into practice what many mothers, fathers have tried to instill in ther children. Often the advice has to come from someone else. You are the someone else.:A Thank you.



I have a very fragile internet connection and keep losing the thread etc. I was in the middle of making carrot cake last night (I really must print up the recipes)when I lost my connection. I just guessed and it was exactly right. I even remembered the garam masala last night. DS1 says it is much better when I put all the ingredients in!!:rotfl: