Advice re. my irritation

joyfull

Thanks for some very interesting and insightful replies.

It is good to be reminded to be direct with a man and not expect him to read my mind or my mood. In fact my OH has often told me to just 'say it'.

Incidentally I don't have an issue with toilet seats - it snuck into the thread.:eek:

Jojob
- very much appreciate you spelling out the way you deal with the issue. That is so helpful. I agree with everything you've said. Being tired is a major part of the situation. I so often feel 'on the edge' with insomnia, hot flushes, weak body etc. In fact I've just remembered that sometimes I simply say to him 'I feel tired & scratchy' & it kind of defuses things before it even gets going.:T

londoner1998
Again, thank you, good sound advice. It seems to be about recognising one's limits & just commmunicating them & taking practical steps.:T

cazziebo

joyfull wrote: »

Hi Peeps,

I'm a bit nervous posting this but here goes.

I get easily irritated with my OH & I don't like myself being that way. We don't live together but have loads of contact & have been together for over 10 yrs. I love him a lot & I know it hurts him when I'm impatient (I try to hide it, but it kind of seeps out). I'm not always like this & can go long periods with no irritation so this isn't about changing him but looking at myself. (btw I'm menopausal, but I don't want to use that as an excuse).

I battle with this & really want to be more tolerant as I'm aware life is short & want to enjoy being with my loved one.

I'd be grateful for any thoughts. Thanks.

My heart stopped when I read your post - I thought I'd written it unconsciously! My OH has just moved in. I've been single for the past 17 years and I know I'm difficult. I'm messy, I'm obsessed with work,I'm rubbish with money and I'm incredibly selfish. My two teenage daughters call me "Psychomum". And I'm very possibly menopausal. My OH is laid back, caring, affectionate, never complains. My daughters adore him. But..

He's a noisy eater, he watches every penny, he mumbles in a weegie accent, he picks up my dressing gown from the floor (easy access on waking) to hang it up on the door hook.... I could go on.

The fact that the problem is mine doesn't make it easier!

joyfull

cazziebo wrote: »

My heart stopped when I read your post - I thought I'd written it unconsciously! My OH has just moved in. I've been single for the past 17 years and I know I'm difficult. I'm messy, I'm obsessed with work,I'm rubbish with money and I'm incredibly selfish. My two teenage daughters call me "Psychomum". And I'm very possibly menopausal. My OH is laid back, caring, affectionate, never complains. My daughters adore him. But..

He's a noisy eater, he watches every penny, he mumbles in a weegie accent, he picks up my dressing gown from the floor (easy access on waking) to hang it up on the door hook.... I could go on.

The fact that the problem is mine doesn't make it easier!

There's something really touching about your honesty. Thanks for posting. How wonderful that despite being the way we are, someone can love us. I wish you well with with the new living arrangement.:)

BarmyCow

cazziebo wrote: »

He's a noisy eater, he watches every penny, he mumbles in a weegie accent, he picks up my dressing gown from the floor (easy access on waking) to hang it up on the door hook.... I could go on.

The fact that the problem is mine doesn't make it easier!

Oh dear god - this was the part that made me think I had written this. But I have to ask - what is a weegie accent ?? To my knowledge my OH doesn't mumble like this - although he does mumble !