Further financial faux pas and even more disasterous decisions

moo2moo

OHs bro arrives on Friday and in anticipation of this OH has purchased 2 crates of larger and a bottle of vino. The vino is already long gone. Can't begin to put the thoughts going through my head in to words. Not entirely sure whether I'm more angry or disappointed. He was very sociable last night but how long is that going to last? How long until we're back where we were three weeks ago. Life has changed so much since then. I can't go back to living like that. More importantly I won't go back to living like that. Will see what happens over the weekend but fully expect the drinking to return to a nightly bottle, perhaps not this week but more than likely soon. Feels rather like I've given up on him. I suppose I have.

In more cheery news I had a most fabulous day yesterday. Spent the entire morning transforming a few broken bits of fence, a pallet and a greenhouse door into a cold frame. Spent the afternoon pottering about doing more bits and pieces and am now glowing rather brightly from spending too much time in the sun without a thick layer of sun proof axle grease. Both DDs caught the sun whilst out riding and were dispatched to bed caked in moisturiser. No doubt DD1 will awaken the colour of a hazel nut whilst DD2 will resemble a tomato.

The hound from hell is enjoying the attention and the vast quantity of treats that accomany the changing of the sock. Shes discovered she can speed things up quite considerably by chomping at the tape, peeling off the sock and bringing it to us as a smelly slimy gift in exchange for further treats and another round of wedge the sock on the hound. Am fast running out of chewy sticks despite buying 100 on Saturday. At least her foot is staying clean and seems to be healing remarkably quickly.

Plans for today involve spending the entire day outdoors in the sun. OH was muttering things about concrete mixing and wall building

lucielle

Moo, I read every day and I feel that this is the thin end of the wedge. How often have you been here? You've seen what life can be like, you are allowed to be happy as well. I mean this in the nicest possible way.
Take Care
L

beanielou

What L says from me too.

Wordsmith

I agree with above. I really feel for you - I couldn't cope with this yo-yo existence. Any chance of a) Nipping it in the bud and telling him before Friday that this will be the last straw and it's up to him whether he puts your family on the line for a weekend of boozing, b) Enlisting his brother's help, telling him straight how it is and saying that if he encourages the boozy weekend he will be putting his brother's family life in jeopardy? You've seen how things can change for the better - there would no doubt be the odd blip (one bottle of wine is a blip, wine and crates of lager are not), but you can work through that to the greater good. Best of luck, lovey.

pennywisepoundstupid

Agree with Wordsworth you need to give him a warning of what will happen if he ends up spending the weekend boozing and also make his brother aware of that OH has a drinking problem.

MrsMoo2U

Big hugs, I agree that you need to tell him that you are worried, for him and you but more importantly for the girls. Tell him the consequences of him drinking. I also think that it might be time to call in the troops and get his brother on side. Unless his brother has the same issues then I am sure that he will understand and help.

Trying_to_be_good

Moo - as your other friends have said. Is there anyway you can discuss with him how much you've nejoyed the last three weeks, and how much you want that life to continue? With all four of you (and copious animals, obviously) in that life?

MatyMoo

I am so disappointed for you and agree with all the advice above. I so hope that you can make him see how great things have been over the last 3 weeks, how much more loving and caring things have been between you and how much of a difference it has made to the family as a whole.

If he really thinks the bottle is a better option then, sadly, I am not sure there is a lot of hope left

moo2moo

Morning all! OH and I had another mammoth chat resulting in lots of odd revelations. It appears that he only ever sees the negative in things, my failure to praise him or reward him with the horizontal tango is seen as a failure on his part and so the reason he drinks. Hmm. The more cynical me thinks any excuse at this point especially as the drinking usually happens when I'm not around. Still yesterday was spent sober. Guess I'm back taking it a day at a time and waiting to see what happens. Its still very early days and I'm really not helping things. My response to being asked what he'd done the previous night since he admitted he'd had too much to drink and couldn't remember was "should you really need to ask?" which then had him wondering what had gone on and why I wouldn't tell him leading to a bit of a strop because he didn't know whether or not to apologise. Wonder when or if it will ever sink in.

Did have a fabulous day yesterday. The last bit of the elm tree was removed in sections without damage to the neighbours garden or hedge. Need to do a spot of clearing up to remove the last traces from the spud patch but its already made a huge amount of diference to the amount of light in the garden. OH strimmed the weed patch at the very bottom of the garden whilst DD2 and I gave a bit more hedge a haircut and eradicated all traces of nettles. Cleared all the weeds from the top patio and hit the ones on the bottom with the dregs of last years weedkiller since they were too big to remove without damage. Both green wheelie bins are once again full. Got two loads of washing done and dried whilst pottling around tidying up bits and pieces. Have chucked loads of broken plant pots and outdoor toys that haven't survived the winter. Hoping to hit the patio with Jeyes fluid to kill off the moss thats appeared over winter. OH cemented some bits that had become loose thanks to excavation of a mouse by the hound from hell. He went on to start on the second log store which hopefully won't be quite as time consuming as the first one.

The DDs claim to have tidied their rooms in anticipation of OHs bro's visit. Planning to enlist the help of OH with either bathroom cleaning or ironing at some point today in and amongst outdoor stuff. Am rahter paranoid that I'll forget to go to school this evening which would be disasterous as its been hired out for a couple of hours. Also need to clean up after holiday club and let the plumber in. At least its not for long.

In and amongst I flea bathed the old dear much to her disgust. She smells far nicer than she did and her fur is v. sft and fluffy but now I've loosed the winter coat its falling out in handfulls. Could really do with bathing the honky dog but need her paw to heal a little more first. It is repairing remarkably quickly. What was a wet oozy crater last thursday and a large pink hole on monday is now a v. small much less pink hole which looks far more paw like. May even be able to leave it open to normal use by the end of the weekend which would be fab. Will still be at least another week before she gets taken out for a walk purely because the repair needs to thicken up first.

ebayqueen_2

Thinking about you Moo
take care over the weekend and enjoy Easter
God bless
E