Great 'Best Cold Caller Rebukes' Hunt

michellelovell

My favourite when I get companies trying to get me to take a credit card or loan with them that I am "gauranteed" to be accepted for, is to go really over the top and say something to the effect of "Oh thank you so much, the timing of this can't be any better. I've just been sacked, my husband has just left me and my landlord is going to evict me and the kids because I am so far behind with the rent. I could really do with about £30 grand and that will clear all the debts and CCJ's that I have outstanding you don't know how happy you have just made me I think I'm going to cry - oh my god you're a life saver" You will find the line goes dead very quickly!! and there are no more calls from them

bestyman

I agree with gropinginthedark (That was not meant to be funny ;o0 )

This is true. I suffer most than others in that my house phone is diverted to my mobile and I foot the bill.

Also , as I am self employed and often unable to take calls. I used to divert my mobile to an answering service who would take my calls in the hope that I would not miss any important calls or jobs. Cold callers ruined this for me, I was charged £1.30 per message and some days I would get 5 messages to call XYZ Marketing about google listings etc. This make this option uneconomical.Now I mis jobs = money.

Although the TPS does work to an extent, it seems that ( correct me if I am wrong) they are the ones who support direct marketing , and when a company is reported to them they are then concerned only because they have not bought a "list of people to ring" from them.

Can we not do something collectively to stop this? Could Martin help us?

diable

Answer the phone, tell them you are the Police DEMAND their details as they need to be eliminated as suspects from a brutal gangland killing, listen to them gag lol

wary

NevMetson wrote: »

also think about this, every single victim lost hundreds of times more than the cost of a TRUECALL device

I remain absolutely convinced that using TRUECALL is todays equivalent of locking your house and making sure to set your alarm.

I think this is the device that featured on Dragons' Den. Yes, it did look excellent although fairly expensive compared to the cost of a phone. I'd love to have one but we don't get enough nuisance calls to justify the expense.

I note your claims that you have no commercial interest in this product, Mr relative-newbie. Please excuse me if I seem a little dubious though as you've plugged it big-style in 4 of your 6 posts to date. Of course I'll keep an open mind, but I'll sure you'll understand why one might have their suspicions.:)

Gaia

This is the best one ever!!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mkdoogjic4I

potbelly

I have found the most amusing, and effective way of getting your number removed from cold caller's databases is to use one word to answer all their questions. The word is 'Yes'. Do not say anything else to any of their questions. And you don't have to even think about what to say. So the conversation goes something like.
"Is that Mr. Smith?"
Answer: "Yes"
"Are you interested in their product?"
Answer: "Yes"
"What is your address?"
Answer: "Yes"
"Sorry, I asked for your address?"
Answer: "Yes"
"Are you going to answer my questions?"
Answer: "Yes"
"How many rooms are there in your house?"
Answer: "Yes"
Eventually you will get something like, "Are you a complete idiot?
Answer: "Yes"
THEY will put the phone down, and no doubt make a note NOT to call again. And isn't that what we want?

I hope that gives the idea. The longest I kept this up for was just over 10 minutes and when the caller hung up, I burst out laughing and kept smiling for the rest of the day.

Taxantim

We have been recently been getting calls from America trying to sell holidays etc which are not covered bu TPS and BT aren't able to police these (sp I am told). I used to be abusive but then thought that might just get them to pass my details onto someone else.

So I either do they old hang on a minute and put the phone on the side or my two other favourites are to be negative to all there answers ie have no money or no job and no credit card......... how much further can the conversation go and why would they ring back .

The one I have used in the street and plan to use next is to try and sell them something back like Sky or a phone contract, you can be quite convincing if you put your mind to it. :rotfl: The thing is as someone said before they are paying for the call, and I am getting somewhat twisted in my old age. I wonder who has the longest time for keeping a cold caller on the phone getting no where?

Kernow_Kid

I managed to keep a cold caller on the phone for just under an hour once.
I was home with a broken leg so I was happy to listen.
He was trying to sell me a conservatory and I just kept going around in circles - asking what colours did they come in, how big did they go, how small, what colours, what was their company, etc...
This was going well until I sensed that even he was going to give up and so I relented and let him have my address:

Apartment 9, Floor 4...

As soon as I said Floor 4, he went mental at me, screaming at how I had wasted his time.
What can I say, I would have loved a conservatory really, it would have been interesting to see them put it up though

gonzo127

i am still trying to break the 45 min mark however this has been made extra hard by having a little toddeler around who damands my attention, oh the wondercful student days when i had spare time....

willingtolearn_2

my partners get so annoyed with me when I say I am on TPS etc etc. He feels I do not give these people a fair chance and how would I feel if that was my job!!!!!

He has a point - but

and just this morning I get one on my mobile asking about cheaper contracts. I told the lady that my monthly spend was only a few quid. She was not interested after that!!!!