Ground rules for student living at home

MissPop

Savvy_Sue wrote: »

Which will make him very happy. He'll be into halls like a shot, and when he wants his LARGE amp he'll ring and see if we can deliver it for him. His words not mine ...

Apologies I haven't read the whole thread, so I don't know if this comment will still be relevant, (and it's a wee bit off topic) but DO NOT let him take an amp to halls with him, if he does choose halls. This semester I've had to put up with an inconsiderate ***wit upstairs who got massive speakers for Christmas and I have had to complain about the noise so many times that he will be kicked out of halls if he does it again. It's totally unnecessary to take it - I have a guitar and never once thought about bringing it with me. I can play it when I go home, and seeing as his halls would be so close, he could pop home any time.

Sorry it's not really on topic, but I just feel very strongly about students taking noise-making stuff to uni! :mad:

Savvy_Sue

MissPop wrote: »

Apologies I haven't read the whole thread, so I don't know if this comment will still be relevant, (and it's a wee bit off topic) but DO NOT let him take an amp to halls with him, if he does choose halls. This semester I've had to put up with an inconsiderate ***wit upstairs who got massive speakers for Christmas and I have had to complain about the noise so many times that he will be kicked out of halls if he does it again. It's totally unnecessary to take it - I have a guitar and never once thought about bringing it with me. I can play it when I go home, and seeing as his halls would be so close, he could pop home any time.

Sorry it's not really on topic, but I just feel very strongly about students taking noise-making stuff to uni! :mad:

I feel your pain ... the 100W speaker lives outside his bedroom door, directed at my dodgy ear when I'm on the upstairs computer.

And when we were first married, we shared a house with an idiot who had built an electric organ in the room above ours. Well, he'd built it in the lounge, and filled the carpet with nasty sharp bits of wire he'd cut off after soldering, but once it was finished this beast moved above our bed.

When I politely asked if he wouldn't mind playing it through headphones while we were still in bed at weekends, he said sulkily "I can see this arrangement is going to take some work!" :mad::eek::mad::eek::mad::eek:

It's a very good point, and one he may already have thought of, because when he didn't get an interview at one of our more traditional universities, for a formerly ladies college, he did say he wasn't sure how well his guitar would have gone down there.

And I suspect that once he's had a few complaints he'll get the message, and certainly if I get the message I will personally come and take it off him! :rotfl: Although if someone like you had taken an axe to it first, I would applaud you.

I can't see him leaving all his guitars at home, however, because I'm not sure he can think without strumming*. But I'll only let him take the small amp (if that!) - the large one FILLS the car anyway!

*With the eldest, he couldn't think without juggling. His A level studies were punctuated by regular thuds as he dropped one ball or another. but it's better than an amp! :rotfl:

MissPop

Well if having a guitar there helps him study, fair enough. Perhaps he could get an acoustic? I've got a 30W amp and know how much noise that can make when it's turned up so God knows how you put up with a 100W one!

Savvy_Sue

MissPop wrote: »

Well if having a guitar there helps him study, fair enough. Perhaps he could get an acoustic? I've got a 30W amp and know how much noise that can make when it's turned up so God knows how you put up with a 100W one!

He's already 'acquired' DH's old acoustic ...

I put up with 100W by insisting he turns it down when I'm in, and once anyone's gone to bed! :rotfl: Doesn't seem unreasonable to me ...

Oh, and we're off to Audiology next month, so there will be Stern Words if he's losing his hearing already. All my family do, but not usually until we're quite a bit older than him. I was always very protective of my ears at his age, but he doesn't think it will ever happen to him.

ab7167

I did the year in industry programme many years ago (96/97) and it was one of the best decisions I ever made. Like your son, I didn't get offered any jobs where I could have lived at home and none that I had ever considered. The one I took was paying £7240 per year (and this was negotiated upwards from £6240 pa for a 40 hour week when I said I would have to live away from home to take the job), and was one of the best experiences of my life. I lived in a bedsit and it taught me abour budgeting in a very real way! I was not allowed either an overdraft or a credit card by my bank, only a £10 buffer zone! It gave me so much life experience, including dealing with a difficult boss and the concept that getting yourself to work every morning on time was your own responsibility - on that salary you can't run a car, and I sometimes had to get up VERY early to get the bus if my lift share was on holiday. There was no excuse if you were late. The one mistake I did make was going into catered halls for my first year at Uni, I hated it as I had been used to my independence in my lovely bedsite.

I believe they pay a little more than this these days, but this was pre minimum wage days. Believe it or not, I thought I was well paid. Rent of £165 per month may have helped!

Lokolo

ab7167 wrote: »

I did the year in industry programme many years ago (96/97) and it was one of the best decisions I ever made. Like your son, I didn't get offered any jobs where I could have lived at home and none that I had ever considered. The one I took was paying £7240 per year (and this was negotiated upwards from £6240 pa for a 40 hour week when I said I would have to live away from home to take the job), and was one of the best experiences of my life. I lived in a bedsit and it taught me abour budgeting in a very real way! I was not allowed either an overdraft or a credit card by my bank, only a £10 buffer zone! It gave me so much life experience, including dealing with a difficult boss and the concept that getting yourself to work every morning on time was your own responsibility - on that salary you can't run a car, and I sometimes had to get up VERY early to get the bus if my lift share was on holiday. There was no excuse if you were late. The one mistake I did make was going into catered halls for my first year at Uni, I hated it as I had been used to my independence in my lovely bedsite.

I believe they pay a little more than this these days, but this was pre minimum wage days. Believe it or not, I thought I was well paid. Rent of £165 per month may have helped!

I'm on £15k. They range from minimum wage type salary (around £12k), to around £20k if in London.

megan2710

Hi,

I went away into halls for my first year of uni and really didn't enjoy it. It was dirty, noisy, still took an hour to get into uni and I really struggles to get my head down and work. So for the following year, I chose to leave the uni, change course and move to one closer to home.

I have stayed at home for the following years of university (I am still studying) and am a lot more independent now than I was previously. I live with just my mum, and I pay her rent. We also have an agreement that if I am home during the day, then I will do whatever needs to be done (washing, hoovering, dog-walking etc) and my only rule is that the rent is on time and that I let her know if I will be home that night.

It worked well for me as I now have no student debt (I have paid off year 1) :j and can work at weekends in a town that is not plagued by 11,000 students all looking to subsidise their loans.

Ultimately it is up to your son. If you can instil discipline into him, and treat him like a lodger, then financially he will be better off in the long run.

luv_or_h8_me

I haven't read all posts so excuse me for repeating.

I currently live at home with my parents whilst on placement and I am finding it really difficult!! My mum likes to do things as much as she complains about it. I am happy to do my own washing and cooking but I often find it is done before I even get back from the day at placement. I still pay rent to. My friends who live at home but attend university get less of a loan than I do when I live away but they also get a regional bursary from the university for attending a local university. So the money evens out in the end.

I have lived away from University and it has also been difficult planning ahead for things and managing money.

Best advice from me would be leave him to do as he wishes (Obviously house rules should apply), if he runs out of clothes then he will have to learn to do it!!

Savvy_Sue

luv_or_h8_me wrote: »

My friends who live at home but attend university get less of a loan than I do when I live away but they also get a regional bursary from the university for attending a local university. So the money evens out in the end.

Now I didn't know THAT! He'll have to look into it.

luv_or_h8_me wrote: »

Best advice from me would be leave him to do as he wishes (Obviously house rules should apply), if he runs out of clothes then he will have to learn to do it!!

Oh don't worry, he already does his own washing, I make mine start doing it in the 6th form so that they learn not just HOW but WHEN to use a washing machine. :rotfl:

MissPop

Yes, living at home will get him less loan than living away from home (one of the things that is stopping me from living at home next year!)