Reformed shopaholic? please can you give me the benefit of your advice

Anglea

Hi girls

NGlady I think most of us here suffer with the 'avoid essentials and buy crap' syndrome

It is shocking looking round the house at what is bought. All I've got is too tight clothes and books, hardly practical.

After all my advice to Ziggles re that friend and now I'm in a situation. Someone I had problems with for years, managed to avoid them for months.

They are overwhelming, create scenes in public, unwanted customer in shops and cafes as really difficult and will complain about everything, often asked to leave!

Accidental meet today and I found it very hard to get away and promised to ring them next week to arrange to meet up. Why did I do that? :mad:

Frogletina

Hi honeys', I'm home :j

ziggles50

Anglea wrote: »

After all my advice to Ziggles re that friend and now I'm in a situation. Someone I had problems with for years, managed to avoid them for months.

They are overwhelming, create scenes in public, unwanted customer in shops and cafes as really difficult and will complain about everything, often asked to leave!

Accidental meet today and I found it very hard to get away and promised to ring them next week to arrange to meet up. Why did I do that? :mad:

Hahahahahahaha! Sorry Anglea but that just made my day- i ALWAYS say that- as i sit here an type i've done the same thing and am supposed to be doing the 'it's not you it's me' convo tomorrow- (i.e. giving notice):eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek::eek:
It's really nice to know that i'm not the only one. I do it all the time, even with firends who i LIKE! We're a hot mess i tell you babes.

WELCOME back Frog- news please once you've settled in:j:j

Anglea

LoL Ziggles at the way you are laughing!

It ruined my evening thinking about it. Grrrrrr

What is even more weird was that I'd gone to lunch in the dreaded pub on Thursday and Mr Annoying wasn't there, the other one didn't talk to me so I felt really happy and relaxed and hoped the worst was over with them.

And now this!!!!!

Ziggles, good luck for your talk, you need to get yourself out of there if it's making you ill.

Hi Frogletina - did you come back engaged? LOL

Anglea

Hi all

Just done something drastic. Decided to change tactics with that person I was dreading seeing. Phoned and arranged to meet up early next week. Going to act as though I'm looking forward to it otherwise I'll just be spoiling life for myself if I'm worried about it.

Have you done anything yet Ziggles?

Frogletina

ziggles50 wrote: »

WELCOME back Frog- news please once you've settled in:j:j

Anglea wrote: »

Hi Frogletina - did you come back engaged? LOL

Sorry to disappoint, but I am not engaged! I could have been married though, we passed a jewellers and he said marry me, tomorrow? I declined saying I couldn't marry him and he looked worried and asked if was married - well, actually I am separated and have been for many years, but I couldn't explain that to him. The most he understands now is that we live in separate houses and have for many years

I have to say that against him, I am not a spendaholic - he is. Well it is easier with someone else's money. Beau did not see it like that - he saw it as 'our money', not mine.

I cannot see our relationship having much of a future, I left deciding that this would be the last holiday we will spend together for various reasons. I have yet to try to explain this to him.

I'm not saying the holiday was awful - we had some good times together, but I could see him wanting to turn me into a Turkish wife.

One night I was in bed about to fall asleep when he wanted some coffee, and indicated for me to go and make it. I declined and it was, me man - you lady, coffee please! lol. You will be pleased to know I didn't make it.

Anglea

Hi all

me again.

Any of you wanting to stop buying clothes, come out with me, I must be jinxed or something.

2 prs jeans - too short, too big
Monsoon cardigan - looked strange
2 thin zip up hoodies - small
2 tops - small
jacket - much too big

And just to annoy me further, remember those clothes I had been losing weight to fit into - one was loose and I'd been wearing it for ages and this week I got into the 2nd one, a black skirt. Wore it yesterday and it was loose, This morning i couldn't get it on, it was so tight. Couldn't believe it. :rotfl:

How did you all get on?

NGlady2

*Does the toilet flushing sound as sound effects* Well ladies, Im a little on the peeved off side I have been having quite a big clear out at home, and throwing things away - i have managed to throw a £40 health product away which is essential for me on holiday for both practical and image reasons. So I am going to have to replace it. Gutted, I only really wear them every so often but need them on holiday to be able to wear my sun glasses otherwise ill struggle ...

URGH..

Only slight upside is, they have a shelf life up until 2013 - so if they are found, they will still be wearable.

Going to try it on with my opticians, saying ive lost my bag or something and see if they will give me 'emergency' supply of a few pairs, if they will then I will have to just ration them on holiday.

Otherwise... flusshhhh the sound of me wasteing £40!

I am on a economy drive this month, to try and see how much I can save, so going to have to return the couple of things I intended to return for size purpose had intended on buying a lace blazer as i live in the one i brought two years ago and wanted a different colour - but im going to have to be sensible and use it for contacts! great lol.

Ahh well it could be worse... i guess.

I've had a wonderful day today - really enjoyed the suprise sunshine

Frog -

Yes I am actually very glad you didn't go make him coffee - Im sorry but you come across a very independent, quite modern woman to bow down to him like that would have been so wrong!

I really don't want to come across nasty about this man - because as you said you did have some fantastic days on holiday with him, and I am sure you really got on with him and its very hard to say this because I only know limited stuff about him. but. I feel he is out for what he can get. Just with the fact you mention he thought of your hard earned savings/money as his money too?!

Did he give you a basis as to why he wants to marry you? Why he loves you? etc.

Whatever you do - please be strong when telling him that you won't be continuing your 'relationship'/'friendship' (I say both because im not quite sure which) and don't let him guilt you into going back out there etc.

You are a fab woman from what i've read on here - and somebody special will be out there for you. I promise



Completelylost:

Hows your potential job ended up?


Anglea:

I know what you mean about one day something fitting fantastic, the next as tight as a vice. That happens to me semi regular also, its horrible! It's really hard to plan what you are going to wear in advance, I often hae to have a couple of options in the pipeworks just in case!!

Nice to know im not the only person with the 'waste-money-on-rubbish-save-money-on-essentials' tious

I dont know who said this, but i think you should possibly ask your son to have a quiet word in the mans ear if you are feeling really self concious about it. No gentleman worth his salt (to quote my MaMa!) woud want a lady to feel uncomfortable.

Zigs:

I hope everything works out for you - i read you said 'give notice' do you mean at work? or on the house?

Have a lovely last-sunny-weekend-of-2011 girlies

This thread will be two years old soon :0

Frogletina

NGlady2 wrote: »

Frog -

Yes I am actually very glad you didn't go make him coffee - Im sorry but you come across a very independent, quite modern woman to bow down to him like that would have been so wrong!

I really don't want to come across nasty about this man - because as you said you did have some fantastic days on holiday with him, and I am sure you really got on with him and its very hard to say this because I only know limited stuff about him. but. I feel he is out for what he can get. Just with the fact you mention he thought of your hard earned savings/money as his money too?!

Did he give you a basis as to why he wants to marry you? Why he loves you? etc.

Whatever you do - please be strong when telling him that you won't be continuing your 'relationship'/'friendship' (I say both because im not quite sure which) and don't let him guilt you into going back out there etc.

You are a fab woman from what i've read on here - and somebody special will be out there for you. I promise

Thanks Nglady for putting such thought into your comments and such kind words.

No, he didn't say why he wanted to marry me. His English is so limited it's amazing we managed to communicate as much as we did. The language problem caused frustrations as he wanted me to explain things to him only for him to say he didn't understand.

I was both sad and relieved when we said goodbye - my thoughts were that I was saying goodbye for the last time and that he wasn't aware of this.

I've a lovely photo of us on holiday, a captured moment in time which I will treasure. And there will be poems when I can bear to write them.

ziggles50

Wow- looks like Frog came back and the thread got a new breath of life.
i am unimpressed that you lot had sunshine today- i had rain and cold- and i had to go to the footie where or seats were weather prone and it was awful.:mad:
The notice was to landlady- she said she was expecting it. i am a bit dismayed, saddened and a bit horrified as to the things she told me about myself.:( it's alwasy a rude shock when people tell you what they REALLY think of you- especially when you have tried to curb your already known faults. I want to have a wee cry but the tears won't come. Not had a good cry for allmost a year- freaks me out a bit but saves on the tissues:p
Thanks for your support and suggestions on that one guys. It was amazingly easy. Just goes to show worry changes nothing and helps nothing, so there's no point- if only it was so easy as to stop.
I am watching an Indian movie on 4 now- alwasy put them on in the middle of the night- drives me crazy:mad:
As for Frog- am i the only one interested in the fact that the coffee thing happened "in bed"?????? :cool::D
At least you made some good memories Frog.
NG- blag those things baby- cry, sniff, claim poverty and bad customer service and see what happens.
As for you Anglea- why did you arrange a meeting? Will you manage it ok if this person is such a livewire? Why not just ignore them until they call you and be busy- do that a few times and they get the hint. While i never follow my own advice- why put up with people who you don't like if you don't have to? but good luck with it though.
Me i'm not going to church tomorrow- i am going to sleep til lunch then beautify then go home to tell the monster that i might have to move home for a bit if i don't find suitable lodgings and eat whatever she's not making for tea.:D
Happy Sunday peeps:)