Reformed shopaholic? please can you give me the benefit of your advice

morocha

nglady, i hope u dont mind me saying this, but why don't you try to reduce your £10 a day, it will help to budget better and will only go to town when you really need it and force you to find things to do in your local area.Also you are looking for a job, aren't you ? it will help you to strech your money further, i honestly hope you do not mind me telling you this, as every time you go to town it seems as you always are buying things, and trying yo justify it.( i do this too)
It costs me £4.60 return to go to town, so i try to go only once a week, saturdays is me shopping day... i can not help it, but i try to do other things, today i had yet another £0 day cos i went to my MIL and cooked some curry for all the family, and tomorrow, well what to say about sundays, it is a really boring day for me, and usually go to MIL for the day.

CompletelyLost

NGlady wrote: »

Yep, I enquired whether I could keep the handbag if I returned the items as I hadn't tried on, and I could keep the handbag which is good. Well, its deffo the first time i've ever seen such a promo on, must remember to keep my eyes peeled in the future huh!£4.70 is a really good day of spending, I wouldn't put your challange in the position where you can't go out and have a bite to eat or afford to catch the bus enough to go for a wonder round, enjoy life too Whats matched betting? Coke and red bull? In the same glass?!

LOL, nooo not in the same glass. Two separate glasses (although they do have Red Bull coke flavour now!) Don't get me wrong, I don't mind paying for things like busfare, but just annoys me that pubs can charge soooo much for drinks. Like treble the price they'd be in a supermarket or whatever. Same with cinemas and their sweets/popcorn.

That's good about the bag though. I bet some people never thought they could have bought £70's worth of stuff then return it all and keep the bag. I would probably have done that

Oh, and matched betting is a form of betting where you basically bet and make a profit. There's no way of losing... it sounds crazy until you understand it (it took me months to understand, but I'm a bit thick lol). If you have a look at this section of MSE, it gives details of all the offers and stuff and has a guide to show how it works - http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/forumdisplay.html?f=41

It takes a while for it to all sink in, but it's soooo worth the effort. Just make sure you understand it 100% before you do any bets, as if you make a mistake, it could cost you hundred. Best hobby ever for me though! I have made about £2500 since I started in January 2009

Shoe_Gal wrote: »

I have £100ish 'fun' money each month - and often have to choose between going out and shoes I usually choose going out as staying in with fantastic shoes isn't as much fun :rotfl::rotfl:

BTW - my 'extra' spends today were a mascara and some teeth whitening stuff

£100 seems like a good amount. Probably about a quarter of what I currently spend.

CompletelyLost

Right, my challenge for tonight - sort through the carrier bags of stuff, try it all on again and then decide what's going back. I was going to take a photograph of all the carrier bags of stuff - y'know, just to shame myself into action... but then decided against it anything that clings or makes me feel fat is definitely going back - no more thinking 'I'll keep it for when I'm skinnier'.

Also, I bought a top from new look a couple of months ago, I got almost 30% discount (they were doing 20% off plus I got 10% student discount too)... but have never wore it and lost the receipt. I am thinking about taking it back. I'll only get a giftcard, but it'll be for the full price rather than the discounted price. Naughty of me, I know.

NGlady

Morocha - you are very right. Thing is, I am applying for jobs at the moment, and due to the distractions (My mum looks after my sisters kids at home during the day) I don't get to concentrate here really, so I do tend to have to go to town quite often. You are right though, I do spend too much and try and justify it to myself, it was my idea to go down to £8 next week then who knows maybe £6 in a few weeks. Also, my local area is my local town alas, I live on a new housing estate where basically theres nothing to do

I don't mind you saying at all hon, its nice when people have ideas and if you ever have anymore, please don't hestiate


Completelylost - Yep I know what you mean, annoys me when you can go to Spoons and get a drink for £1 and the same drink is £4 in some places? Cinema snacks are too expensive too, i understand its cos they don't make profit on the films it has to come from the food, but still.

Do you girlies find it easier to budget as a weekly amount or a each day amount?

Shoe_Gal

I actually have a monthly amount. If I have a daily or weekly amount I feel compelled to spend it - usually on cr*p

CompletelyLost

Yep, it's annoying isn't it :S I'm stingy when it comes to drinks... shame I am not the same with clothes/toiletries/other carp! Plus I live right on the seafront so all the pubs are overpriced (well, more expensive than chains of pubs that you find in cities that often have good offers) as we get quite a few tourists and people coming here for the beach.

I'm not sure about setting myself an actual amount to stick to, as I think it'd always be at the back of my mind, tormenting me (a bit like when you're on a diet and know you can't have chocolate)... I kind of just know in my head what feels like too much, if that makes sense.

Anglea

Hi all

Enjoyed reading your all posts ladies, and the infamous shopping trip NGlady LOL

Well I had a total Eureka moment when I was out. :T

Backstory - for years now since I've been living alone most of the time I have lost my confidence with cooking for anyone but the family. So during the times I've had some unexpected visitors, I've nearly gone to pieces worrying about the food..

So I made a lot of plans to experiment with cooking, always have a lot of food in the house, keep it really tidy etc but it's always been a one week wonder (except for Christmas) so I've been caught out many times and ended up getting extremely stressed.

Plus there are many times when it's inconvenient to always walk up the shops e.g. when it was snowing, yet I had to as I didn't have much in the house..

So, today I took a short cut through the supermarket (to reach the interesting shops) and half way through suddenly had that moment of enlightment - instead of buying unnecessary clutter or misfit clothing, why not just get the cupboards stocked properly and experiment with different types of cooking, then hopefully I can feel more confident if my son continues his habit of inviting people to stay overnight without teling me!

You wouldn't believe it but once he invited his cycling team for the weekend as they were participating in a big race, and I only found out by accident :mad:

So, watch this space! This time next week should see a change in my habits.

NGlady

Angela, thats very interesting. Is it possible, that like we was saying before about our childhoods not having much money for clothes etc, that this could be linked back to your childhood? Not having enough money for good foods or treats, or maybe even something like your mum was obsessed with Cooking for people etc? I had food posioning when I was little, and now, like when my parents are away im obsessed with milk I get it in my head that when I smell it even though it may say 2 weeks from now on the label its gone off and chicken im terrible with. Also used to have OCD with washing my hands.

Is that your partner whose invited the Cycling team? Oh dear, bet you wasnt impressed lol.

I decided late last night, that I am going to have a experiment over the next week. Everyday, I am going to write down exactly what I spend and collect receipts whenever possible. I am going to then do a graph (Yay knew those colouring pencils would come in use one day ) about what I spend on Clothes - broken into whats necessary and unneccessary i.e if I get told of a last minute interview and my shirts in the wash or something, a shirt will be "necessary" however that new pair of shoes I want cos there pretty "Unneccessary" - also what I spend on food, broken into avoidable and unavoidable - Travel neccessary and unneccessary - and magazines sweets etc all unneccessary. It will be a lot of work, but if I start doing these on a week by week basis maybe it will shock me a little more than usual and show me areas for improvement I am looking forward to getting all the receipts out next saturday and doing this also quite nervous as if i waste i dunno £25 over a week, thats £100 a month and £1200 a year, i've been earning moneyish for 3 years so ill have wasted £3600 just on bits and bobs of extra travel etc, that would have paid for my car

Would anybody else be interested in doing the Graph/talley chart thing with me? Maybe if a few of us do them, we could put them on the computer and add them onto this thread

Other to-dos are, as "sale" email comes I am going to unsubscribe every shop. Out of site out of mind.

CompletelyLost

I've made a really basic spreadsheet which I record every single spend in. I have categories like - food, beauty, clothes, necessities and miscellaneous. Then I have another column for any returns/vouchers used. So by the end of the month I can see exactly how much I've spent on all the different things. I've been doing that for 18 months now, ever since my spending started getting out of control. I think it helps to see it all there in front of you.

Today = no spend day as I'm not going out. Last night I tried on everything I have bought recently and not a single thing looked nice like it did in the shop.

I know this is going to sound insane, but when I look at myself in the mirror through my own eyes I think I look fine. Yet when I take a photo of myself (I used my camera on self-timer) wearing things I look so bad I can't bear to look at it. I would love to know which version is the real me. Am I making any sense?

Anglea

Hi everyone, Happy Mother's Day

NGlady, it was interesting what you said about yourself and food poisoning and your current reaction to milk and chicken. I have a phobia about chicken and poultry and would only eat chicken and turkey, but never with any bones showing after some very horrible experiences on farms when I was little. But I did spend years only eating a vegan diet because of the things I saw on the farms and I used to nearly faint when I passed a butchers shop. How does it affect you?

Also when you asked if mum was obsessed about cooking for people. I think there is something about that because mum is a very good cook and she's also the sort of person that no matter who rings her up and says they are visiting overnight (uninvited) she will never turn them down and always cooks very big meals, bakes lovely cakes etc.

I used to be like that too, very confident with cooking and impromptu visits, but over the years, I have lost it unless it's for my children or Christmas Day - then I don't have any problems cooking for loads of people..

Reflecting over those dreaded unexpected visits, that it's not just about cooking, but I dislike my clothes and hate to see anyone, plus they always seem to arrive when the house is the messiest or I'm having a bad hair week :rotfl:

It was my son who invited the cycling team over for 2 nights. (I'm one of the oldies on this forum) As it happened mum stepped in and said she would cook a hot meal for them all, so I did a cold buffet for another meal, I was ok about that.

Finally got a reply from the overseas girl that wanted to visit. She had completely misinterpreted my letter luckily understood I couldn't see her. I think in future when I need to say 'no' to something I have got to learn to be blunt instead of trying to justify it as I got really stressed out over the worry of it for weeks..

I bet you are going to get quite a few surprises with your chart

Today only visiting relatives - NSD

Have a good day everyone!