Miscarriage support

ttc39

Glad you got the time to relax without him until sunday hun

Are you going to do much this weekend? Could you catch up with your rl mate? Think u said a bit of a distance away? Cant remember where everyone said they were now , im northampton, if you lived near me id help you out of this sutuation hun xx

sweaty_betty

rosie_78 wrote: »

I told him that bf has forced himself on me a few times now but I wasn't too expressive about it. I don't want to/ cant say it out loud easy so write a lot of things down. I also told him OH does naff all around the house, leave a mess ... etc etc and he wanted us to go to couples therapy (my psychologist offered that too). OH says point blank no. it's my mental health issue, not his. sorry to rant. no one else to really talk to about this. sorry xx xx

I don't want to be pushy, but this isn't about your mental health, it's about his attitude towards you. Forcing himself on you is rape, which is never acceptable, and shows that he has big problems (his own mental health issues). Him doing nothing around the house shows he's not treating you with respect and is taking you for granted. If you were a friend telling me this face to face I wouldn't hesitate to tell you to leave him, right now. But only you can decide that. But I'd guess that his attitudes are not helping you with emotional issues or your mental health problems.

Sorry I can't be more constructive - but if you need help please let me know.

rosie_78

thank you both xx xx

im in oxford - so next door to northants. used to go there a lot actually to see a very good friend. sadly she moved to wales.

I know it's not right. but I cant cope with more change now. I need to get stable on the new medication.

I know I shouldn't moan about it because i'm effectively letting it happen by not moving out / away. but I just can't now.

sorry xx

sweaty_betty

I understand. The only thing I can suggest is trying to take little steps while you're getting stable, and work on your self-worth. You are worth more than this.

Please feel free to talk about it if you need to.

ttc39

Hi again, I totally can understand what you are saying but echo SB advice.

YOU are important and YOU shouldn't feel like you have nowhere to go or that You have to put up with bad behaviour.

Rosie you sound so lovely Hun, you def need to work on getting yourself if a good place to break free..

I have a hen do next week, then parents over and a wedding but I'm up for meeting one sat or Sunday , maybe 2nd week of november for a cuppa , I know you don't drive so can meet you somewhere, maybe a few of us could all meet in real life? I think tea only lives in rugby from what I remember xxxx

tea_lover

Yeah I'm in rugby so not a million miles away. Big hugs rosie, enjoy having the place to yourself this evening xx

rosie_78

that sounds really good! . I do drive

he just texted me to say he's missing home, and he's got a very early start tomorrow for this exhibition . I said im laying in ... till when I want!

He told me to go eat something (how on earth would he know I've skipped???) . apparently there is something i'll enjoy in the cupboard behind kitchen door so i'll go take a peek next time i'm up.

bit nervous about new medication - venaflaxine. has anyone heard of it before? x

msb5262

sweaty_betty wrote: »

I don't want to be pushy, but this isn't about your mental health, it's about his attitude towards you. Forcing himself on you is rape, which is never acceptable, and shows that he has big problems (his own mental health issues). Him doing nothing around the house shows he's not treating you with respect and is taking you for granted. If you were a friend telling me this face to face I wouldn't hesitate to tell you to leave him, right now. But only you can decide that. But I'd guess that his attitudes are not helping you with emotional issues or your mental health problems.

Sorry I can't be more constructive - but if you need help please let me know.

Betty I wish I could thank this ^^^ a hundred times...well said.

I do worry about everyone on here - hope you are all doing ok, love to everyone
xxx

claire16c

Rosie that made me feel sick reading that.

If he's raped you you need to leave. And to be frank the last thing I'd be wanting is a baby with this man as that would mean another 18 years of contact with the creep. If probably be taking the pill in secret.

If I knew you I'd be round your house now while he was away helping you pack.

This can't be helping your emotional problems by having someone like him to worry about.

My friend has been having a pretty rough time having a mc at home her hospital are a bit useless in many ways and are just letting her get on with it.

It brings it all back I'm still pretty terrified for this pregnancy.

Why is that you can have bad things happen to a couple of people, good things to many, but all you can think about is the chance of the bad stuff happening to you!

please-let-me-be-lucky

Rosie, you know my opinions on all this. I understand you not wanting more change, but after the initial upset it will all get immensely better than it is now for you. Use the time while he isn't here to think about what YOU really want. Would it be fair to bring a child into the world when it's Dad treats it's Mum like that? If you had a daughter and this was happening to her, what would you advise?

It would be lovely if you could all meet up together Xx

Claire, how far on are you now?

I've made a Drs appointment. Next one is Thursday but I will cancel if AF shows up beforehand, if not it will be 9 weeks by then. Feeling very down and teary at the moment so might be linked. Hospital appointment a week on Wed. Hopefully they have the test results on the twins for me as I haven't had anything back Xx