Probs with my other half :(

bigmomma051204

Hi - feel so bad for you! I have just asked my h2b for his opinion as he is a man (they are another species after all!) and much as i hate to voice his opinion cos i dont want you to feel worse BUT he says that if a bloke disappears in the middle of the night, without telling you where he is going or even waking you to let you know that he IS going, he is up to no good. He reckons that his mate used to do exactly what you have described and he used to use Dave (my h2b) as the "friend" whose house he had supposedly gone to... when in fact he was with the bird he was having an affair with. When he had finished with the "other woman", he would then go on over to h2b's house at they'd then lounge around...thus meaning that in "man world" he wasn't ACTUALLY lying to his missus cos he HAD been at his mates house....in the end, after he had married his mrs and had a baby, they got divorced when child was 7months old...my h2b was the catalyst for the break-up in fact cos he got tired of being the excuse and having to lie for his "mate"...so gave him an ultimatum - tell ur mrs or i tell her....so the friend told her and then left her for the mistress (who them chucked him a month later for someone else - KARMA!)

Sorry long-winded. Bottom line, he disappears in the middle of the night without an excuse or the decency to let you know, then lies and acts like a child for a WHOLE day after. I wouldn't put up with that. You deserve more (thats my h2b's statement btw)

(((Hugs))) tho cos it is HORRID to be in that situation :(

wanttogetwed

Well folks, he decided he would go to bed before the kids - coward! So we never got our 'chat'. Think I am gonna ask my mum if me, kids and dog could stay at hers for a few days. Maybe when he realises what he is missing he'll come to senses and think about us a bit more!

Thanks everyone for the advise - dont know how I would have got through today without you all xxx

frannyann

I think thats a very good idea, give him a choice between growing up and acting like a husband and father, or sodding off a being a wally
(((hug)))

wanttogetwed

frannyann wrote: »

I think thats a very good idea, give him a choice between growing up and acting like a husband and father, or sodding off a being a wally
(((hug)))

TBH that's exactly how I feel now! Shape up or ship out!

beks

Didnt want to read and run ....
don't rush ahead and marry this man just because you have things booked ... if it doesnt feel right, it probably isnt.
His behaviour is unacceptable and you cannot put up with this for the rest of your life.
A break from each other is definitely a good thing and time for you to both reevaluate things.
Good luck and (((hugs)))

karen24_2

Have you thought that maybe your other half is trying to put you off from wanting to marry him?

wanttogetwed

He has come back down stairs now, think he is realising how angry I am. Have told him to read all this....
Anyway I am 100% sure he wasn't with anyone else. However still really annoyed. Have told him that I want him to leave for a few days Think he thinks he has done nothing wrong but but as he is sobering up seems to be realising how much he hurt me!

Lets hope my head is clearer tomorrow

bigmomma051204

karen24 wrote: »

Have you thought that maybe your other half is trying to put you off from wanting to marry him?

Are men that deep??

Fliparoo

Sorry I don't have anything productive to say, just wanted to show my support after reading this thread.
Hope you resolve the issues and things work out.. Hope he realises that you're one amazing lady for even waiting for him to come home and act like a child for that length of time. Not only is it hurting you, but the kids.

MrsTinks

Hand him a bag with a few pairs of undies, t-shirts and jeans and ask for the front door key and tell him to hoof it!
Arrange for him to meet you on neutral ground at the weekend (what on EARTH is he doing drunk in the middle of the day on a monday anyway????) to discuss all this and make sure he realises that it's up to HIM to prove that he's worthy of you and your forgiveness - not the other way round!
And DON'T call or text him till then!