Probs with my other half :(

rene2b

sorry but all i can say is i feel for the kids
i wouldnt up and leave with the kids why uproot them and upset them more
id tell him to leave and take jd with him

choille

I think your man has a serious alcohol problem.

I really think you have to put yourself & your kids first. If he's behaving like this now why would marrying him change his behaviour?

Toothfairy4

choille wrote: »

I think your man has a serious alcohol problem.

I really think you have to put yourself & your kids first. If he's behaving like this now why would marrying him change his behaviour?

That's the only other explanation i can come up with to, to need something so badly that you have to get out of bed at 3am to get it is pretty bad? Being drunk on a monday morning/afternoon is not normal behaviour, especially with children around!

Herbiecat

I'm sorry but why would you want to marry this man????? And most of all why would you want to keep putting your kids through this????

He sounds like a complete and utter ar*se. If my fella got out of our bed in the middle of the night and left the house I would cut his balls off. He must be with another woman or man - To me theres no other explanation and as another poster wrote, if you ask the opninion of any other man they would all say he has another woman on the go.

You need to get him out of the house, send him back to his mothers and never let him back in again - I can not think of any reasonable excuse for his behaviour and I really think you are setting yourself and your chidren up for a massive fall if you marry him.

I hope to God we are all wrong and most of all good luck for the future xxx

wanttogetwed

He has had alcohol problems and went to counselling. To be honest when he is good he is an excellent dad and partner but when things like his dads 60th come up he goes off the rails. he is away back to work today but I have said to him I cant live like this and that if he is going to get bladdered and stay out everytime there is a family occassion then he would have to leave! I'm not living like this and more importantly my kids are not having to live with it.

I know he'll sort his self out now because he knows the consequences but I have still asked him to leave for a couple of days I want him to understand how much upset he caused.

Jo_R_2

You know he'll sort himself out? So it's okay for him to behave like he is because up until now you haven't given him an ultimatum? He's a complete tool!

Reading this through, he sounds scarily like my ex (apart from the disappearing in the night bit.) My ex was a great dad - when he was there and sober. I still believe he has alcohol problems - he didn't stop or calm down even when on the occasions I said I couldn't live like it - he'd belt up for a week or so then it was back to the usual.

The thing is, it's all very well him realising how much he hurt you - but he still did it in the first place didn't he? And not for the first time? Has he always been like this - and if so do you think he can change? Does he *want* to change? Words are fine but actions really do speak louder than words.

Jo_R_2

Just wanted to add, I see what you are thinking with asking him to move out for a couple of days - but think how that actually looks to him. "Oh I'll be in the doghouse for a couple of days, just have to put up with that then she'll let me back in and it'll be back to normal..."

You should tell him to move out and show you how he's going to change before you let him back at the very least IMO.

bigmomma051204

Hi - just wanted to say that i hope things are okay this evening ((hugs))

Toothfairy4

same from me

buzby_boy

Yes hope everything is better today
just make sure you think this through carefully before deciding what to do, i do agree with the others that i dont think you 2 are ready to get married at the moment but hope it worls out for the best
big hugs