depression

Miroslav

Same old tinsel
Same old tree

Christmas, my a$$!

Apologies for my non appearances, if anyone has noticed anyway.....if not, i've been here all week, it's your screens playing up.

Feeling very low, thanks to 'S'. Very mixed emotions still, but also a bit of resentment from me.

Will post more soon/later.


Hope you are all okay.

blinky

Miroslav wrote:

Same old tinsel
Same old tree

Christmas, my a$$!

Apologies for my non appearances, if anyone has noticed anyway.....if not, i've been here all week, it's your screens playing up.

Feeling very low, thanks to 'S'. Very mixed emotions still, but also a bit of resentment from me.

Will post more soon/later.


Hope you are all okay.

Good to hear from you mate but sorry to hear that you are feeling low

sleepy

I'm having a low day too. I can't decide what to do about work christmas party tommorrow night. I'm not suppossed to drink because of the anti depressants and everyone is going to want to know what I've been doing for the last two weeks. Don't want to be the only sober one and spend the whole night explaining myself. However, there are a couple of people I'd really like to see and have a good evening with. Decisions, Decisions!

blinky

sleepy wrote:

I'm having a low day too. I can't decide what to do about work christmas party tommorrow night. I'm not suppossed to drink because of the anti depressants and everyone is going to want to know what I've been doing for the last two weeks. Don't want to be the only sober one and spend the whole night explaining myself. However, there are a couple of people I'd really like to see and have a good evening with. Decisions, Decisions!

Just say you think you're coming down with something. Alternatively say you drive and you won't be drinking. Little white lies come in handy sometimes.

Hope you are feeling better soon.

feelinggood_2

Hugs to all.
Miro, glad you are back, will PM soon

geminilady

Miroslav wrote:

Same old tinsel
Same old tree

Christmas, my a$$!

Apologies for my non appearances, if anyone has noticed anyway.....if not, i've been here all week, it's your screens playing up.

Feeling very low, thanks to 'S'. Very mixed emotions still, but also a bit of resentment from me.

Will post more soon/later.


Hope you are all okay.

Great to see you posting Miro and yes you have been missed.Sorry to hear you are fealing low,think that applies to a lot of us at this time of the year.Mixed emotions?mm i know all about those.One wrong word from someone we care about can send us down while a nice one can put us on the top of the world.Lokking forward to your post.Is "S" still coming for xmas?It will be just me and my boys,they are 14 and 22,not got much family mum died 10 yrs ago but i still miss her,always will i suppose.No chance of seeing "N" but possibly after xmas not really sure as we had words,still talking though so thats something.

Miroslav

As previously stated, here I am posting again.

Have had problems with my mind thid week, mainly to do with 'S'

I don't think we will ever be anything more than friends, basically as she's so messed up. I think she may be permanently 'mentally ill' and all the events of the past have left too many scars. She is visibly unwell most of the time, she sometimes talks with a slur and her concentration is awful.

I've been trying to come to terms with the fact, that someone I really am very fond of, may never get to a point where she can have a proper relationship, and it hurts, as beneath the 'illness', is a wonderful girl.

Another person I kind of know, describes her as 'shallow' in terms of depth. She's very simple, and doesn't understand most things......conversation with her is incredibly difficult......I think the term is 'slow'.

Today, I found out something else - she used to do recreational drugs. She only did them because she lived with dodgy people and felt pressured, and realises now it was a big mistake. However, flatmate thinks they may have caused permanent damage. I'm not sure if they can or not, I am not an expert.

However, this other friend she has, my flatmate has met them before, and the car smelt of something dodgy - wacky backy or something else maybe, so I am very worried now, as she is so vulnerable. She knows it's no good for her and last time it totally messed her up even more........but right now, she's struggling and she's easy prey for someone

I am totally against drugs, just because i've seen what they do to the people taking them, and the families, so i'm not sure what i'd do if she was taking them again. I'm 90% sure she isn't, but I have a small doubt.

Do I support her, but show her my displeasure, or do I offload her out of my life? I really care about her, but I don't want a druggie friend.

She's a really sweet girl, very vulnerable. She trusts no-one and is waiting for me to hurt her, which I have no intention of doing. She's not bad in any way.

Confused as anything

When i'm with her, i'm really uncomfortable and want to be there, but don't.

When i'm not with her, I want to be with her, but I pray to god, I don't bump into her in the street. I need to be prepared!

I've gone away and tried to sort my head out, but can't.

I'm going slightly mad myself

Miroslav

blinky wrote:

Good to hear from you mate but sorry to hear that you are feeling low

Sadly, the story of my life. But I know i'm strong enough to fight on.

Hope things are well with you, will go back through the pages soon and reply to all.

Miroslav

geminilady wrote:

Great to see you posting Miro and yes you have been missed.Sorry to hear you are fealing low,think that applies to a lot of us at this time of the year.Mixed emotions?mm i know all about those.One wrong word from someone we care about can send us down while a nice one can put us on the top of the world.Lokking forward to your post.Is "S" still coming for xmas?It will be just me and my boys,they are 14 and 22,not got much family mum died 10 yrs ago but i still miss her,always will i suppose.No chance of seeing "N" but possibly after xmas not really sure as we had words,still talking though so thats something.

Yeah, I miss people this time of year even more. Well, maybe not more, but it feels more because of what Xmas is meant to be about, families and all that.

'S' doesn't understand, even though next Thurs will be 5 years since her Mother died. She's odd, she didn't seem bothered about it Sunday. I've no idea what is true and what isn't with her.

'S' is still coming for Xmas, until she cancels on the day no doubt

14 and 22 :eek: Are they still mummies boys?

At least you are still talking with 'N'. Doesn't sound like it's irrepairable, which is good. Hope you have a good Xmas with your boys

Miroslav

Another gripe.........

My bathroom scales. They say i've put on 9lbs in 4 days.

Balls!

I've eaten healthily all week. I reckon they are cream crackered!