depression

Horasio

Sazbo wrote:

You're nearly there CC hun, you will get there. Hugs, saz xxx

It is always worse the nearer you get there

Have read everyone's posts - what a lot of activity yesterday on here!

Saz you have really got a bad luck cluster going on just now, how come it always happens that way, when one starts I always feel worried about it piling up.

I don't have much to say but you are all in my thoughts, feel frazzled from yesterday and the big row with our son. At least my husband was OK about what I did and will have a sort out this weekend of his two rooms and retrieve what are his tools.

My mum is caring but has the old fashioned attitude of being kind to the males to get results. I have done the nice approach, I've tried the ignoring approach, I have tried everything. I was so tired this morning and he just had to push me. My husband agreed about the safety of the wire and his slipshod attitude. I don't want to stress him too much, worried about his mother etc but he moans about how lazy our son is too

blinky

CCStar wrote:

I have wrapped a liitle pressie already and hubby had bought the main pressie already. I wish he would send it back or give it to me.

If I could have my own way, I would cancel his Sky and make him pay for his contact lenses.

I have my family against me tho' - little by little getting them to agree with me. But this wouldn't have got so bad if they had been more supportive in the beginning.

Probably partly pride - don't want to admit they are wrong and don't want to admit you're right.

Sazbo

blinky wrote:

Probably partly pride - don't want to admit they are wrong and don't want to admit you're right.

exactamundo...

Tiff_2

Hi CC! :hello:

CCStar wrote:

I need to vent before I can give info about my day yesterday
My son really makes my blood boil - I have just shouted at him big time and he just pushed me over which made me break something. Of course he says I broke it.
I can't believe he pushed you over cc! That would have been his red card right there! Did OH see it happen?

His messy rooms and not clearing them - we want the house cleared before we put it on the market. He is a !!!!!!.
Solution: "Please clean your room out by Monday. On Monday, I will be going into your room and anything I find out of place or not sorted will be put into a black bin liner and put out for rubbish." Either way, you have your solution. Be calm and make sure he understands that you are serious. Having said that, don't say it if you can't bring yourself to follow through on the threat.

Being slow about putting up the lights - I know the weather has been bad but he didn't think to put them up when the weather was nice last week, no his party had to come before our pleasure (for all of ours) His coming in late which disturb me which means I get overtired when I am disturbed. That is why I can't sleep at night
Who would have put the lights up if he wasn't there hun? Couldn't OH do it?
It sounds extremely thoughtless of him - no wonder you're so frazzled cc. You may be surprised at what the gp can offer. No, it doesn't solve the problem hun but it may help you get through all of this better.;)

He is hanging around with drop outs
Sadly, we can't change what they do once they're out of the front door hun, can we? It's how he will learn to be more selective in his choice of friends and lifestyle. I think many parents have had the same opinion at some point hun so it's not just you. Don't personalise it angel - he'll learn one way or the other.

He has squandered his (our hard earned savings).
Then it's time to remove them from his access angel. Can you do that CC? If nothing else, he'll have a real wake up call one day when he needs that money and realises it was there but he blew it away on nothing. You'll have nothing to blame yourself for - it'll be his problem.

He left the wire of the Christmas lites all dangerous and refused to do anything about it.

Couldn't OH either fix it or take it down? I know he's got a lot of stress with his Mum though after her stroke and maybe he's the kind of person that can only deal with one crisis at a time. It's natural that OH is very worried about Mum - though that's not helpful to you when you need support. There will be a lot of support for Mum when she comes out of hospital. Physiotherapists, Occupational Therapists, Support Workers and Social Workers will help put a care plan into place for her. Be sure to tell them she has no family living near her as that may get her extra help. Hope this helps in some way. Thinking of you.
Much Love
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Hi ethel hun!:hello:
Hoping you're alright angel. You must be physically and mentally exhausted ethel.

EthelBloggs wrote:

howdy peeps.. sorry for disappearing last night
Daughter was home 20 mins before I had to call an ambulance
It sounds like an awful situation for you ethel. These things can't be helped but you'd already got more than nough on your plate. Don't worry hun - we don't lock the gates (just the catflap!) and we know you'll post when you can. Everyone here understands hun I'm sure.;)

Spent the night in the local A&E dept.. they wont let her out so i've just come home to shower n change and go back and then they're arranging a car to take us to the place where she normally is for a meeting at 4pm... after that.. who knows
Well angel, it's obvious she can't be at home. I'm amazed they sent her home tbh. At least the hospital are holding on to her for now so they can address any problems with her ao that's good. Hun, I don't know when or how, but try and get some rest and eat a little something whenever you can.

have a good day everyone.. sorry haven't time to read everythng but I'll try n catch up when I can *huggs*

We'll be here for you sweetheart and I know you'll keep us posted - you and yours are what's important right now. You're doing a fantastic job hun!:A
Thinking of you as always.:grouphug:
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

mclaren wrote:

Aye i certaily am - going to the game anaw so hopefully another good day for PLG and the rest of the squad - esp after we dun it 3 - 0 hibs on Saturday lol

I'm just getting ready to go to docs - have to be there for 2PM so will post an update when i get back from there lol

Aaah - but have you heard about their new secret weapon?.....



Be afraid - be very afraid!:D :rotfl:
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

Hi feelie!:hello:
Wow - atta girl! :T

feelinggood wrote:

Heylo again guys

I've just had a big, emotional talk with OH (could call it a row really) and he said something that I needed him to say to help me move on with my life.
One thing I've been worrying about, is that by leaving, I'll make him miserable. He told me today that I make him miserable now. So, I can't really upset him anymore, so I don't need to feel guilty about that.
Sounds like some peace of mind coming for you at last fg.;) I stayed with ex-DH for longer than I needed to because I was worried about him. You have to live your life for yourself. And recognize angel, that he was making you miserable - so no guilt trip for you! You sound a much happier fg already!

I've decided to spend a week or so at my Parents house - I need space away from him to clear my head and allow myself to be a little happier.
The plan moves forward.
I am leaving him. Will get on to the IB people and sort that out.
I will carry on with my treatment even though OH doesn't want me to.
I will talk about my problems, even though he tells me not to.
I will be happy.
I'm proud of you hun - you're finally taking responsibility for your own happiness and health!:T It's awful how he's treated you - when you were feeling so low you listened to him dictate what treatment you could or couldn't have. That's not love in any shape or form.

I've had a few very low days lately, and I'm feeling a little annoyed with the lack of help I've recieved, not only from my GP, but from other sources (Gave up waiting at A&E as I didn't get to see anyone). But, I'll carry on with it - need to go back to the doctors tomorrow to get more tablets as I'll be away over xmas.
Yes angel - please carry on with the medical help. You'll still need that extra support hun. If you're not getting the help you need, you have to tell them louder and make sure they understand feelie.

I'm feeling okay now, I'm finally feeling 'safe' again, which is a tremendous relief, most of the thoughts and urges are past, so I feel that I can be back around you guys again. I'm sorry for going, I hope you understand that I did it for your own sakes, and I hope no one worried - but its not a good idea for me to be posting when I'm in that danger zone.
You were most eloquent in your posts angel - no apologies necessary!;) The main thing is, that you did what was best for you at the time. I would hope though that any one of us does not feel that they have to cut themselves off in the bad times because that's when we can help each other the most.

I'm still a little unhappy, I'm still a little low, but I'm feeling hopeful. I know what needs to be done, I've just got to do it!
I'm probably heading back up north on Monday, and I'm unlikely to be online very much, but I will be thinking of you all, and happy xmas to those who are having xmas, and just have a good day on that day to all of you who aren't celebrating this year. But anyways, I'm here till I leave, so I'll say this all again.
I also want to take this opportunity to say a huge Thank You to everyone who's helped me through this time, its been a very upsetting, very stressful and very scary time, and its helped me more than I can describe knowing that I'm not alone. I'm very happy that I don't have to walk this road alone any more
Thats that, I will shut up now.
Oh, and one last thing - today is my 20th day without smoking or drinking!

There's just no stopping you, is there feelie?! Congratulations hun!:T
I'd like to say an even bigger THANK YOU for all the advice, warmth and fun that you've brought to this thread angel. You'll always be part of the gang so you'll never be alone.;) Post when you can to let us know how you are hun - remember most libraries have access to t'internet! :rolleyes: :rotfl:
Be kind to yourself fg - big Tiffy hugs to you!
Much Love,
Tiff xxx

Tiff_2

elona wrote:

Well done on day 20 feeling good.
Bet DH does not realise that he has "shot himself in the foot" by saying you make him miserable now!
As you are in a Catch 22 situation then you might as well please yourself and do whatever it takes to get yourself better.
Alarm bells rang for a lot of us when you said he did not want you to take medication, see doctor, see therapist, have counselling etc.
His answer to everything seemed to be no.
Have a good Christmas and the very best of luck.

Hi elona!:hello:
I completely agree hun!:T Hope you're ok angel?
As for DH - maybe he'll finally get some counselling!:D
fg - he has really set you free angel.;)
Much Love
Tiff xxx

feelinggood_2

Thanks for all your posts yesterday and today guys
I'm back off to the doctors at 9:30 - I'm seeing the head doc, and I'm going to explain to him that I'm not happy with my treatment, and feel that I need more support than I'm getting.
The one thing that tends to stand in my way is the fact that, due to anxiety&fear, I hide behind a mask. I can discuss 'symptoms' and 'problems' and 'possible causes', but struggle to add any emotion in as I fear than once I start crying, I won't stop. I'm going to start by explaining this to him. He is the head of the practice, so he'll hopefully be a bit more help.
I'm also going to push to see a physcologist, cos I'd rather like a proper diagnosis, as I wanna know whats wrong with me head.
Anyways, gotta go get dressed, will let you all know later.
Hope everyone is good, spending lots of hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

blinky

feelinggood wrote:

Thanks for all your posts yesterday and today guys
I'm back off to the doctors at 9:30 - I'm seeing the head doc, and I'm going to explain to him that I'm not happy with my treatment, and feel that I need more support than I'm getting.
The one thing that tends to stand in my way is the fact that, due to anxiety&fear, I hide behind a mask. I can discuss 'symptoms' and 'problems' and 'possible causes', but struggle to add any emotion in as I fear than once I start crying, I won't stop. I'm going to start by explaining this to him. He is the head of the practice, so he'll hopefully be a bit more help.
I'm also going to push to see a physcologist, cos I'd rather like a proper diagnosis, as I wanna know whats wrong with me head.
Anyways, gotta go get dressed, will let you all know later.
Hope everyone is good, spending lots of hugs xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Good luck, hun hope you manage to get something positive out of it.

I've spent years living behind a mask. At the time it made it easier for other people but at the end of the day it just screws you up more

Big hugs to all

I'm okay today but missing 'R' :blushing: Damm, what has that girl done to me?