depression

Horasio

I didn't sleep last night and (don't flame me or tell me off here!) I rooted thro his stuff to find his statements I asked him to find.

He has been dipping in for three years. He has spent £3.5K in that, so any interest has gone.

He has started work today. As I said we bought it up last Monday but he lied. It hasn't been 5 months, but three years.

This isn't his first lie we have caught him out in.

So we have the major deceit, the loss of OUR money we have given him for his future and me having trouble sleeping to cope with.

EthelBloggs

Hiya everyone

Sorry for causing so much worry the other day, I didn't mean to.. just lost the plot a bit

Tried to get an appt with my GP but none for two weeks so in the meantime I've doubled my AD dose... see if that helps til I can get to see him.

Hope you're all ok *hugggggggggggggs*

Ethel xxx

blinky

EthelBloggs wrote:

Hiya everyone

Sorry for causing so much worry the other day, I didn't mean to.. just lost the plot a bit

Tried to get an appt with my GP but none for two weeks so in the meantime I've doubled my AD dose... see if that helps til I can get to see him.

Hope you're all ok *hugggggggggggggs*

Ethel xxx

Glad you're okay. Could you not say it's an emegency and get an appointment quicker?
Don't like the idea of self medicating.

Thinking of you

blinky

CCStar wrote:

I didn't sleep last night and (don't flame me or tell me off here!) I rooted thro his stuff to find his statements I asked him to find.

He has been dipping in for three years. He has spent £3.5K in that, so any interest has gone.

He has started work today. As I said we bought it up last Monday but he lied. It hasn't been 5 months, but three years.

This isn't his first lie we have caught him out in.

So we have the major deceit, the loss of OUR money we have given him for his future and me having trouble sleeping top cope with.

At the end of the day it was his decision to 'dip' into his savings. Just don't bail him out. He will have to learn to handle money and some tough love is needed.

I would be tempted to cut back on Christmas presents for him. He needs to learn that he can't just have everything he wants when he wants it and to save money.

I know this is harsh but sometimes you need cruel to be kind.

EthelBloggs

blinky wrote:

Glad you're okay. Could you not say it's an emegency and get an appointment quicker?
Don't like the idea of self medicating.

Thinking of you

Thanks blinky.. thing is I don't want to see any of the other doctors there, they're likely to say wait til i can see mine anyway.. they dont like to interfere with each other's treatments I think.

I'm monitoring myself and if anythign weird happens then I'll go bck to 1 a day.. I read somewhere that sometimes the dosage is up to 60mg a day so I think it's ok.

megahuggs

Ethel xx

Horasio

blinky wrote:

At the end of the day it was his decision to 'dip' into his savings. Just don't bail him out. He will have to learn to handle money and some tough love is needed.

I would be tempted to cut back on Christmas presents for him. He needs to learn that he can't just have everything he wants when he wants it and to save money.

I know this is harsh but sometimes you need cruel to be kind.

I have no trouble with that and thank you:)

Getting my husband to agree to it is another matter, so it isn't just our son I'm up against!

Horasio

I'm not ignoring you - I need to get my head together.

I will reply to you all when I can.

In the meantime

(((Big hugs)))

blinky

sleepy wrote:

Also, sorry to be unburdening myself so much on here, how do I stop it effecting my fiance? I don't want to be a pain and cause him any trouble. We live together and he had to spend hours last night calming me down.

I don't want him to get fed up with me because I'm more work than a "normal" girlfriend.

From what you've said I would say he knows that things aren't right with you. He has stuck with you so far so I don't think you're in danger of being dumped.

Be honest with him - tell him how you are feeling. It will help both of you. I know from experience that somethings are difficult to tell loved ones.

This might be useful.

http://www.mind.org.uk/Information/Booklets/Understanding/Understanding+depression.htm#What_can_friends_or_relatives_do_to_help_

As far as work is concerned, if you think work would be sympathetic - tell them. They can make allowances, reduced workloads / hours.

From what you have said you have suffered in the past. If then and now has the potential to impact on your work you can actually claim it as a disability for work purposes. I do when applying for jobs and my current employer knows I have problems. It also means they cannot discrimitate against you based on your depression.

Telling people does help. It acts a a way of releasing some of the feelings.

Part of me thinks what you need to do is not neccessarily change jobs but change your approach to work. Try and leave work in the office and don't work late. If work doesn't get done then it doesn't get done. I know this is tough to do as I'm trying to do it myself, particularly if you've worked in such a culture for a long time.

Hope this helps

sleepy

I really don't want to tell work.
I told my OH everything yesturday and it has helped. I'd spent the last couple of weeks just bottling it up inside. He is very supportive and loving, I just feel guilty for being a burden.
I haven't stopped crying since I started thursday evening! Feel completly drained by all the tears, my eyes and throat hurt, but I just can't stop. It's enough to make me feel completly crazy!

blinky

sleepy wrote:

I really don't want to tell work.
I told my OH everything yesturday and it has helped. I'd spent the last couple of weeks just bottling it up inside. He is very supportive and loving, I just feel guilty for being a burden.
I haven't stopped crying since I started thursday evening! Feel completly drained by all the tears, my eyes and throat hurt, but I just can't stop. It's enough to make me feel completly crazy!

Crying is good. It provides a way to let some of the feelings out.

I wish I could cry...