depression

Miroslav

Sazbo wrote:

Good morning my lovlies. Well, that was a fairly hideous week. Glad it's over. Feel like I'm so not coping, treading water until counselling starts. Exhausted too. Told my boss I couldn't take on this other project he wanted me on, can't handle anything else right now. Drank too much at that work do on Wednesday evening and ended-up leaving my rucksack on the train :rolleyes: But on top of that the trust who runs our flats - they're p1ssing us around something chronic at the moment, so on top of everything else, there I am trying getting legal advice about it, on behalf of all the neighbours, when all I want to do is go home and sleep.

Miro - let us know how it goes tomorrow hun, with S. Perhaps she feels that if she can chat to your flatmate and play with cats, it's a bit easier for her? Just my thoughts. I'm sure she'll be glad to be spending time in your company tomorrow. See how it goes. I'll be thinking of you, of course.

Sounds like you've had an 'interesting' week

Hope nothing major was in the rucksack?

I'm starting to panic about tomorrow. Flatmate keeps saying she is coming to see me too, but she's just being nice. I'm just thinking this isn't gonna work, I need 'S' to respond to my note and let me know what she's thinking, as she cancelled Wednesday, didn't show yesterday and didn't even acknowledge we were meant to be visiting her today. I'm getting vibes she thinks i'm worse than the people causing her trouble, as she at least knows they exist.

flis21

Hi everyone, How are you all?

I am doing ok, feel fairly good still. State of the flat is getting me down, but can't seem to summon up the energy to clean / tidy up! Have spent 2 hours ironing today tho, so feel like I deserve a medal!

Exercise regime is going really well, have been to the gym 3 times this week and on the days I didn't go to the gym I have been doing 'brisk walks' along the seafront for 30 mins. Had a quick peak on the scales today (I know my official weigh day is Monday, but I had to see) and i have lost 6lbs already. Do kind of feel a bit better when I have finished the exercise, it is like a sense of achievement, but still feel knackered / achey while I am doing it. I suppose it will improve as my body gets used to it.

Miro - good luck for tomorrow hun, I hope it goes ok. Try not to get yourself too upset, it sounds like 'S' has a lot of her own problems and we all know how hard it can be to motivate yourself if you are feeling bad.

CCstar - glad you seem to be feeling a bit better, sometimes we need a bit of quality chilling out time, so maybe your body was just telling you you needed that?

Judi - it sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the moment, I don't think I could cope with all that pressure. Have you been to see your doctor? If not can you arrange a time to do it, always worth having a chat with a professional just to get some advice. Try to make sure you have some time to yourself everyday, even if it is just 10 mins, we all need that. Can anyone around you help to take the pressure off a bit until your feeling a bit better? Anyway, keep posting on here, we are all friendly and supportive, so if you need any help / advice or just somewhere to moan or a shoulder to cry on, feel free to post here.

Everyone else - lots of hugs to you all.
Flis

Miroslav

flis21 wrote:

Hi everyone, How are you all?

I am doing ok, feel fairly good still. State of the flat is getting me down, but can't seem to summon up the energy to clean / tidy up! Have spent 2 hours ironing today tho, so feel like I deserve a medal!

Exercise regime is going really well, have been to the gym 3 times this week and on the days I didn't go to the gym I have been doing 'brisk walks' along the seafront for 30 mins. Had a quick peak on the scales today (I know my official weigh day is Monday, but I had to see) and i have lost 6lbs already. Do kind of feel a bit better when I have finished the exercise, it is like a sense of achievement, but still feel knackered / achey while I am doing it. I suppose it will improve as my body gets used to it.

Miro - good luck for tomorrow hun, I hope it goes ok. Try not to get yourself too upset, it sounds like 'S' has a lot of her own problems and we all know how hard it can be to motivate yourself if you are feeling bad.

CCstar - glad you seem to be feeling a bit better, sometimes we need a bit of quality chilling out time, so maybe your body was just telling you you needed that?

Judi - it sounds like you have a lot on your plate at the moment, I don't think I could cope with all that pressure. Have you been to see your doctor? If not can you arrange a time to do it, always worth having a chat with a professional just to get some advice. Try to make sure you have some time to yourself everyday, even if it is just 10 mins, we all need that. Can anyone around you help to take the pressure off a bit until your feeling a bit better? Anyway, keep posting on here, we are all friendly and supportive, so if you need any help / advice or just somewhere to moan or a shoulder to cry on, feel free to post here.

Everyone else - lots of hugs to you all.
Flis

Flat cleaning...........been doing it all day, just incase 'S' thinks we are dirty I mean, we aren't, her flat was a little grubby, her loo was terrible but like to make a good impression.

Well done on all the exercise

I'm hoping tomorrow goes well, but as always, prepared for the worst, as I know I have to hold back with 'S', not because I am mean, but because she is very sensitive and may not understand my sense of humour. She's also 'slower' than I thought. Sometimes you need to explain things and other times it takes 2 or 3 seconds for her to take it all in, and after that small thinking gap, she'll respond. I think she also is waiting for me to be like all the other guys she's known..........she'll be waiting a very long time then!

I'll know from minute 1 her mood with me.............whether I get my hug from her or not.

Miroslav

judi24 wrote:

Hi all. I haven't posted on this thread for along time and I don't want to hijack anyone's story but I really needed to express how I am feeling. There's no one at home that would understsnd.

I am feeling very down at the moment. I have had episodes of depression throughout my life but they are usually fairly managebale, but rigt now I feel so low I feel i could go to bed and never get up again.

I am married with 4 children aged 15,13,4 & 2. I have been studying for a masters degree over the last year. But that is finished now. I have just left my current job and start a new job using my new skills on monday, with more money. So all should be rosey. So why is my mood so black?

I cry at everything. I don't want to be around anyone - even the kids. I'm fat but can't stop eating and sooo tired.

I have got to get things together and fast!

My new job is a 80 mile round trip and the new salary comes with new responsibility. They will expect me to be this clever smart person that I am not.

I am also going to have to be very organised at home so that everyone eats well and has clean clothes, clean house etc. and Iam also going to have to make sure everyone gets enough attention including my OH ... But I just can't be bothered.

Sorry for the moan. I know I have got lots to be thankful for but why do I feel so bad?

Hi Judi, i've had depression since I was fairly young, and lately, it's felt like I could never get up. I'm up and down, by the minute.

Sounds like you have a busy life, but depression will hit, no matter how busy, or no matter what you have or have not. I've lost alot in my life, but at various times, i've not felt alone or depressed.

Sadly, depression isn't black and white.

Hope you feel better soon, meanwhile, keep posting here. There are better posters than me, as my English, although pretty good, sometimes I can't explain things the way others can

judi24

Thanks to you all for your replies.
It's just a relief to be able to express things. My OH doesn't understand. He is supportive in alot of ways but also causes me to feel worse. He seems to be able to wind the kids up ina blink of an eye then I end up as referee. Then he moans that I'm not supporting him! I can't seem to win.

He asked me if we could sit down and talk with the older 2 kids (as they are causing stress too) without me crrying. I said I doubt it! He said that that wasn't very constructive. I jsut don't think he realises how bad I feel - I don't normally burst into tears for nothing!

I know I should go and see a doc. I got a bit of a fright today cos i completed a depression scale that I use for patients (i'm a nurse!) I tried to be honest answering the questions and it scoed me as being moderately to severely depressed.

The problem is I've just taken this new job. I am worried about not being what they expect - i feel such a fraud.

At the moment i feel like a c**p mum and wife let a lone some supersmart nurse!

Sazbo

CCStar wrote:

Had a better night and day today.

Ticked my husband off big time and we actually relaxed and enjoyed last night.

Our son is away all weekend and so far quiet on the neighbour front.

I woke up feeling OK then felt odd, was going to go out but brain just closed down and I couldn't be bothered. Caught up on watching vids and enjoyed having peace.

I'll see how it goes tomorrow.

May the peace continue tomorrow xx

flis21

Hi Sazbo, How are you? What are you up to?

Sazbo

flis21 wrote:

Hi everyone, How are you all?

I am doing ok, feel fairly good still. State of the flat is getting me down, but can't seem to summon up the energy to clean / tidy up! Have spent 2 hours ironing today tho, so feel like I deserve a medal!

Exercise regime is going really well, have been to the gym 3 times this week and on the days I didn't go to the gym I have been doing 'brisk walks' along the seafront for 30 mins. Had a quick peak on the scales today (I know my official weigh day is Monday, but I had to see) and i have lost 6lbs already. Do kind of feel a bit better when I have finished the exercise, it is like a sense of achievement, but still feel knackered / achey while I am doing it. I suppose it will improve as my body gets used to it.

Everyone else - lots of hugs to you all.
Flis

Good to hear from you flis. Well done you re gym regime and weight loss. You've inspired me to get back on track next week But as for cleaning, well, I'm learning to be friends with my dust......

Sazbo

flis21 wrote:

Hi Sazbo, How are you? What are you up to?

Hiya flis. I'm not too bad thanks, glad it's the weekend, thank goodness. You got anything nice planned?

flis21

Hi Judi,

Have you explained to OH that you think you have depression? Maybe if he knows that he might act differently? Just a thought.

It is really tough and depression can strike anytime anywhere (unfortunately!). Although as a nurse you probably have a better ability to self diagnose than any of the rest of us.

All my thoughts are with you and I do really suggest you try to go and see a doctor, mine has been an invaluable help for me, not just giving me medication, but advice and referrals as well.