Eager Elephant's Effective Everyday Excursion ...

Eager_Elephant

STBEXH has really narked me, last weekend we put some of his new furniture on my credit card due to the Visa issue, I asked him for the money and he says he doesn't have it.

Well he did have it but has conveniently forgotten about owing me money and so has spent it all - he has told me to raid his ISA which only has £300 in, I have told him I will take it from FIL estate account which we were saving for the fireworks FIL wanted and then when he is ready to do the fireworks he can fund it himself.

I am so annoyed with him but then I am annoyed with myself for not remembering what he is like when it comes to money. The money he should have paid me has been spent on an Xbox One for DD and various other crap that keeps turning up at my house.

Last night he stayed here but in DS' bed so we can go and get DS today, his snoring is annoying me - it used to annoy me all the time but this past week without him has been bliss although DD mentioned that she heard him snoring the other night!!

Thank god I got out when I did - I fear I may kill him at some point.

beanielou

Just proves that you made the right choice at the right time.

HairyHandofDartmoor

Yes you are definitely well out of it. Make sure you do get that money back from fil's estate. You wonder what sort of financial mess he'll get into without you around to pick up the pieces.

I feel your pain with DS and laundry, plus missing cutlery/plates :rotfl:.

pennywisepoundstupid

Agree with the above, you are well shot.

Why is he ordering things and sending them to your address and not his own, Is he running up Credit cards again that are tied to your address?


Take care xx

badmemory

If HE bought stuff on your cc just make sure he doesn't still have access to it. Some places have been known to ask if you want to use the last cc you used. Would this be the right time to do a full password change? Change the locks? Sounds unkind with a friendly split, but do you really want him walking in when you are just out of the bath & thinking it is an invitation, been there done that got the Tshirt.

Eager_Elephant

HairyHandofDartmoor wrote: »

. You wonder what sort of financial mess he'll get into without you around to pick up the pieces.
.

Quite a big one I think HHOD, about 2 weeks after I told him to leave a credit card turned up from a sub-prime company which I his in anger.
I noticed the other day some paperwork in my house from another sub-prime lender who have given him another credit card.

pennywisepoundstupid wrote: »

Why is he ordering things and sending them to your address and not his own, Is he running up Credit cards again that are tied to your address?

I assume because I have been at home all week he has sent them here although interestingly the new TV he ordered (which he didnt need as I had 3 here he could have) he had sent to work. I'll see what next week brings and then after that tell him to stop.

I think these new cards will be at my address but we dont have anything joint so I am luckily not linked with him on my credit report.

badmemory wrote: »

If HE bought stuff on your cc just make sure he doesn't still have access to it. Some places have been known to ask if you want to use the last cc you used. Would this be the right time to do a full password change? Change the locks? Sounds unkind with a friendly split, but do you really want him walking in when you are just out of the bath & thinking it is an invitation, been there done that got the Tshirt.

Sorry I should have explained, I input my card details and purchased them through my account with the company. He had the money at the time and was adding up as went along but then we all got side tracked and forgotten, it wasnt until earlier this week that the transactions appeared on my credit card and i asked him for the money.
I also paid for 3 other shops on my debit card as he had forgotten his debit card but I made him transfer the money within a few minutes of me paying as it was my food shop debit card.

I have contemplated the change of passwords etc and might do it if I think he has been snooping.

When he came round last night he knocked on the door rather than using the key which is in a secure box on the wall for which he knows the code - I must change that if I can work out how.

He is about 7 miles from me and is so exhausted after a day at work that I dont think he would just come round as he is too tired:rotfl:


I wont make the same mistake again with paying for stuff and actually we are still on good terms, as I keep saying to people, STBEXH makes a lousy husband but I would still like him as my friend as he has a good sense of humour and is a laugh.

Sun_Addict

Might be time to close the cc and get a new one he doesn't have access to.

Glad you've realised you made the right decision.

Time to reclaim your life

Savvy_Sue

Coming out of lurk mode ...

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

What I am not looking forward to is the mountain of washing that he brings home (because why waste his laundry credits for the last few weeks when he knows he is coming home and mum can do it?)

PLEASE tell me YOU'RE not going to do his washing?

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

and the fact that most of my kitchen will end up in his bedroom so we will reach the point of nothing in the plate/cup cupboard and a distinct lack of cutlery:rotfl:

I mean, maybe you're just joking, but he must surely have worked out that he has SOME responsibility for domestic chores, even when at home?

I'd make sure I had clean crockery and cutlery set aside for myself, and let him fend for himself if he hasn't.

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

STBEXH has really narked me, last weekend we put some of his new furniture on my credit card due to the Visa issue, I asked him for the money and he says he doesn't have it.

Well he did have it but has conveniently forgotten about owing me money and so has spent it all - he has told me to raid his ISA which only has £300 in, I have told him I will take it from FIL estate account which we were saving for the fireworks FIL wanted and then when he is ready to do the fireworks he can fund it himself.

I am so annoyed with him but then I am annoyed with myself for not remembering what he is like when it comes to money. The money he should have paid me has been spent on an Xbox One for DD and various other crap that keeps turning up at my house.

I just don't know why you're surprised by any of this. Reading your thread, I wasn't, not at all!!!

Seasidegal58

Hi EE - just caught up with your goings on.

All sounding ok on the split front - apart from the money and parcels that arrived - but now he's ensconced in his own place that will stop now. It's good to stay friends but do remember to treat him as a friend now - you're not responsible for him anymore - you can give advice to him, but as we know he's going to get himself into a monetary pickle without you, only give advice - don't feel sorry for him and bail him out in any form whatsoever!!!!:eek:

Have a good day EE.

beanielou

Happy Friday