Eager Elephant's Effective Everyday Excursion ...

Sun_Addict

Wow EE! Can totally understand why you made the decision you have. You need to think about you now and move forwards. I wish you well with your journey xx

armchairexpert

Bless you, EE. I can't remember if I've posted before but I've read your diary since the beginning (not for all of these years! I mean I read it in a couple of sittings and kept up ever since). I've wondered in recent months whether your leaving-when-DD-is-18 plan was still going, because one minute you refer to that and the other you're planning to buy a smallholding together.

But the long and the short of it is, you've been unhappy for a long time, trying to make it work for a long time, and it's perfectly reasonable to have had enough. You don't have to present an argument that would hold up in court about why. It's okay that you're just done.

Good luck! From lurking a long time, I've noticed a lot of posters do very well financially after their break ups with spendthrift partners.

Seasidegal58

armchairexpert wrote: »

Bless you, EE. I can't remember if I've posted before but I've read your diary since the beginning (not for all of these years! I mean I read it in a couple of sittings and kept up ever since). I've wondered in recent months whether your leaving-when-DD-is-18 plan was still going, because one minute you refer to that and the other you're planning to buy a smallholding together.

But the long and the short of it is, you've been unhappy for a long time, trying to make it work for a long time, and it's perfectly reasonable to have had enough. You don't have to present an argument that would hold up in court about why. It's okay that you're just done.

Good luck! From lurking a long time, I've noticed a lot of posters do very well financially after their break ups with spendthrift partners.

Good point made in your last paragraph armchairexpert.

maddiemay

Wishing you well, you have weathered such a lot EE, it is your time now and you will be fine, maybe bumps on the road, but you will make it through. xx

*Robin*

(((Hugs))) to you, EE; you do sound ready for a new direction - do agree with what armchairexpert has said - may the changes you are about to implement be positive for your future in every way.

Rx

mary_hinge

I have just caught up with your diary EE, I hope now you have made a decision you feel empowered to steer your life down the path that you want to lead. I am not suprised and would say this has been along time in the coming. Please be kind to yourself, I'm sure currently you are in practical mode to ensure everything runs smoothly. Will Mr EE be able to secure a private tenancy with his poor credit rating?

You are very brave and self less allowing DD to move too, I'm not sure I could see beyond my need to having my children with me in this situation.

Much Love

Mrs H x

Chrystal

Hope everything is OK with you EE.

Regardless of anything I think you have to do what's best for you. We only get one life and you are entitled to happiness as much as anyone else. (((hugs)))

natsplatnat

Eager_Elephant wrote: »

I have even worked out that I can afford all the outgoings on my wages (DD will live with DH) and I have never done that before.

Just wanted to say that although I have no intentions of leaving my OH (nor him me.... as far as I know) I do check every now and then that I could afford to be on my own... just in case! lol

Sun_Addict

They do say you should always have a running away fund natsplatnat

Seriously though, after going through what I did when I almost lost Mr SA 4 years ago, you have to have an idea how you'd manage on your own. You never know what's round the corner.

Savvy_sewing

EE, I stayed with my first husband for 13 1/3 years, he is the father of my four children, but I plotted and planned my excit from the marriage, and took the decision that I was better off on my own even with 4 children then staying with a Man who told lies, and who I had to tell what to do, etc who like your chap spent as fast as I saved. But mine was so lazy after work it was like having 5 children, and I got fed up of telling him to get washed, or changed his underwear!!
I have had hard times over the 23 years since but I don’t regret it ever.
Waiting till kids are older is an old fashioned way of looking at it, and they are not stupid they can see what’s amiss. It only teaches them it’s ok not to pull their weight or how to be dysfunctional in their future.

Take care, and do what you have to do.
You have always been here for me, so you know where I am if you just want to rant etc