Buffy Cracks the Egg Diary 2010

Shoe_Gal

beanielou wrote: »

Ooops Buffy is avoiding us:rotfl:

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl: I hope she'sout having fun - only excuse allowed

sallyx

No she is def hiding from the fear of EBAY....

Buffythedebtslayer

*Looks sheepish*

Ahem.... went out for ages and am just off out now........ebay? whats that you say about Ebay?

xxxxxxx

thrifty_fifty

:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:


I'm just climbing back into the ebay saddle. 2 items a week-so it doesn't get too crazy.

xx

LouiseJ

Ebay is not in my good books at the moment.

DS sold a game for £22 and the buyer, who still hasnt paid for over a week has just sent me a message asking if we will still post it as he doesnt get paid until the end of the week but needs it for a present:eek::rotfl:

Yeah..........RIGHT!

beanielou

Yeah right indeed~not!

beanielou

Buffy....................
Where are you?
Ebay calls:rotfl:

Buffythedebtslayer

Hello folks.

am back after a couple of busy days.

yesterday it was nice I saw a friend and chilled out. Today we had to go a hospital appointment for Mum, all was well but we got lost on the way home, 2 hours later plus a few traffic jams, GOD what a horrible stressful experience.

Which leads me to the next thing. I need to start my driving lessons again. I have put off booking them due to being worried about driving and the money thing.

I honestly don't like driving. When I was younger I loved cars and knew all about them - could clean sparkplugs and change a tyre but as I grew up essentially I lived in London and could walk/bus/tube anywhere. It was my independance. I loved it. Even going to uni I walked everywhere and my teaching practice was completed by a series of lifts and car shares and I like trains!

Moving back here where I live now not driving has always been a problem. We live on top of a !!!! off hill (which now I can walk up in 5 mins!! V impressed) coming back from the station with books I have to get a cab, getting to my second job is always a stress.

And today - If I had been driving it would have been easier, I am not saying we wouldn't have got lost, we still would have but I wouldn't have felt so bad.

My not driving is part of me reacting to not wanting to take responsibility for what has become my life - I know this sounds dramatic and poncy! bear with me..... I have stepped out of my life and just let it happen to me on and off since we lost Dad. I know both Mum and I had different plans to what we are now and part of me wants to pretend this isn't my life.

I have moments when I do stuff, but I get tired of fighting the inaction of my sister she is so utterly useless, I feel completely responsible for Mum and the house and trying to change stuff sort out things. Even tho I feel responsible I can't do any of the things that need doing - going to the tip,doing a car boot sale, clearing the garden, getting plastic for the roof - my sister doesn't work and neither does her BF but neither of them do ANYTHNG to help Mum without being repeatedly asked, it is then discussed and talked about - for example cutting the grass - they discussed it for 20minutes on Sunday, came over one day this week and did the frint lawn, not the back (which really needs doing). This is the pattern for everything.

I know once I drive I will REALLY be responsible for everything, Mum is already getting more frail and driving today was a real strain, one she shouldn't have to go through. My sister doesn't seem to realise anything, the frequent attempts at conversations with her just have her basically ignoring me!!! I almost haven't wanted to be able to do more cos then Ireally would have do it all and she gets off the hook? does that make sense.

Anyway after alot of thought I have decided that its time I took lessons again. It will put back the debt free date and generally be a pain the backside but it has to be done. Living like this, stress at work stress at home, no longer having close friends nearby it just sucks.

My sister means well and is happy is in her life. She is not going to change and neither is my Mum. If I want Mum to have working heating a decent garden and a fairly stress free life (as much as it in my power to do that) I have to do what I can. Driving honestly would make all the difference. It would also make all the difference to my working life and me having some freedom.

So my first lesson is tomorrow 9 O clock.

Wish me luck

xxxx

macgirl

Good for you! :T Despite being responsible for your Mum more than ever, you'll also buy yourself some more independence.

All the best, it's a good move I doubt you'll regret

beanielou

Hope it goes well hun xx