Buffy Cracks the Egg Diary 2010

GeorgeUK

Buffy, if you are stupid, what am i?

You have put alot of pressure on yourself, yes.
You want to get rid of the debt as fast as possible - that's natural.

You do so much to pay off the debt quicker on top of already having a stressful job. If you didn't have any debt at all, would you still be stressed? I'm guessing yes and it is the job that's doing it.

Don't burn yourself out trying to meet targets and timescales.
Focus only on what you can change and stop hitting your head off a wall trying to get everything else sorted at the same time. I know that telling you to stop trying so hard isn't going to change anything - that's who you are. If there's a problem, you want to solve it. I'm just asking you to slow down a little - the deadlines for paying off the debt are not important at all compared to your health and this is getting unhealthy. I know that the job is causing you alot of anxiety but that's not going to change - no matter how hard you work at trying to make them happy.

You need to be able to step back from the problems to see what the best way to tackle them are - or even if they can or should be tackled. There isn't always a solution.

Focus on yourself and your concerns - if the lunatics want to run the asylum into the ground, let them. Just make sure you aren't taken down with them. :grouphug:

Buffythedebtslayer

Thank you George and Urg xxxx

I don't deserve your support really.

I stayed up till silly o clock marking. which was good in the sense that it more or less kept me out of trouble but bad in that I am shattered. Still like I said only myself to blame!

I think it will be dinner and a nap, wake up in time to finish another lot ( I wish i could be more specific but we have signed all sorts of things at work not to talk about it so........... damnit I need that smiley thingy!

Re work long term its just not viable to carry on like this, it is getting worse in terms of the emotional pulls, so many people having problems and no time to solve them.

I mean take today, I had my big observation, got completely freaked by it - see yesterday's post, had a horrible day because of it, came out with a two which is a miracle btw and am now Ok the rest of the week looks rosy but these extreme highs and lows plus all of us at work feeling the way we do. Its bonkers.

If any one has any suggestions as to howto stop stinky work taking over
your life please let me know.

I am so glad that I can come here and witter on

xxxxxx

Buffythedebtslayer

Been thinking some more. Overall today was mixed (have fallen asleep)

I am so glad the lesson obs went ok. I am too tired to explain how relieved I am but it has made me realise that a lot of this work stress is down to me being emotional about work - the management aren't they literally do not care period. if you are in work work till you bleed and if you aren't then fill in this form and tick this box,NEXT! Now clearly in the real world I am sure that is what it is like and this is part of what I mean when I say I need grow up a bit.

I have had my get used to phase this appears to be how it is in a quite afew places now and although the job is emotional and people based as teachers it simply isn't like that now.

Well you know what there are worse things, and despite (if you are a regular reader of my diary!) what you might think for me personally work is better. I almost feel sorry for my boss he is so overworked.

It is hard to see my friends so upset but like I said I simply cannot take it personally on me if you see what I mean.

I will get through this week and work something out over half term. Remind me that it can give at least part of my life back if I do this please.

xxxx

OOO today was nearly a no spend day ! but I bought some cough candy for £1
(had to put something in about money!!!)

LouShoe

A big hug to you Buffy. Please, please do not think you are alone. So many people have said to me recently that the profession has changed beyond recognition in the last decade. I think it is very sad that hard-working, dedicated teachers who clearly care above and beyond are not being recognised and encouraged to stay in education. More and more good teachers are leaving to do lesser paid or even equally paid (but much less stressful) jobs and I wonder what the useless overpaid bigwigs at the top will do to man their classes then.

I relate so much to the post you left on Sunday night, Buffy. I am so tired and fed up of the same old thought processes - everyday waking up and thinking ' I can't do this again but I've got to do this again but I can't...' So I've told myself to get through to the end of this academic year, re-assess the money situation and then get out. At the end of the day, while I value financial stability, I have come to realise that peace of mind, health, mental stability, happiness, time to spend with friends and family and not spending every single minute (including during my sleep) worrying and thinking about work are all far more important. Life is (unfortunately) too short.

This is only my first full year of teaching as well (third year with GTP training, NQT year etc). I think you have done an amazing and hugely admirable job to have managed as long as you have. Keep smiling, Buffy - one day we will look back at this and it will seem a lifetime ago.

Take care,

LouShoexx

Buffythedebtslayer

LouShoe wrote: »

A big hug to you Buffy. Please, please do not think you are alone. So many people have said to me recently that the profession has changed beyond recognition in the last decade. I think it is very sad that hard-working, dedicated teachers who clearly care above and beyond are not being recognised and encouraged to stay in education. More and more good teachers are leaving to do lesser paid or even equally paid (but much less stressful) jobs and I wonder what the useless overpaid bigwigs at the top will do to man their classes then.

I relate so much to the post you left on Sunday night, Buffy. I am so tired and fed up of the same old thought processes - everyday waking up and thinking ' I can't do this again but I've got to do this again but I can't...' So I've told myself to get through to the end of this academic year, re-assess the money situation and then get out. At the end of the day, while I value financial stability, I have come to realise that peace of mind, health, mental stability, happiness, time to spend with friends and family and not spending every single minute (including during my sleep) worrying and thinking about work are all far more important. Life is (unfortunately) too short.

This is only my first full year of teaching as well (third year with GTP training, NQT year etc). I think you have done an amazing and hugely admirable job to have managed as long as you have. Keep smiling, Buffy - one day we will look back at this and it will seem a lifetime ago.

Take care,

LouShoexx

Yet again I could have written that. I know once the debt is gone it willbe difficult for me to find the motivation to stay.

You go in to the job thinking one thing and after a while - an increasing short while you realise that reality is something entirely different. Miracles must be worked. Everything is your fault and within your remit to change. If so and so teacher can do it so can you (er no, sorry some kids have a tolerance they can go so long with out kicking off) and I loathe the way that if you do get on with a kid you get a bloody parade of teachers in to see how you do it. Jesus people 9 times out of ten you are just lucky. The result of this shared practice - teachers pitted against each other, people not asking for help. :mad:

any how rant over

*cleansing breath out*

xxxx

beanielou

Buffs~I honestly do not know how you do it.

Buffythedebtslayer

I don't know Beanie, i guess I hope that if there is an election then it might change. I mean lots of the measures the Labour govt have put in are expensive and I am fairly sure the Tories will have to make cuts so it might change things a bit.

But on a day to day basis you just do it, sadly mostly for the money.

Right best get ready for tomorrow.

see you all tomorrow night!

xxxx

beanielou

Sweet dreams hunny b un xxxxx

GeorgeUK

G'night Buffy.
Try not to sweat the things you can't change.

Wol2

Buffy Hun...

Methinks you need a break .otherwise you sound like you might go pop :eek:;)....


....have PM'd you with a suggestion

Oh :eek:.....Boy piggies now making a lot of wheeking noises :cool:

xxxxx