homemade presents and ungrateful family!!

neffy58

I have been reading this thread with interest and can't believe just how rude and ungrateful some people can be. For me, one gift I received several years ago is still remembered fondly - some homemade crystalised pineapple a dear friend had made for me. It was one of my most favourite gifts ever.

lolly1981

my ds1 gave his support teachers at school some homemade jam that he had helped do and decorate the tag....and one of them said that it is something she will never forget and it was sucha lkovely thought....i guess there are some people who really do get the meaning of homemade gifts...im sure as a teacher she would have received a lot of chocolate and smellies (not saying she should appreciate these gifts anyless than a homemade on)...but little in the way of homemade...and my ds1 was so very proud of himself that he had helped make it (with the help ofa breadmaker lol)

i would love someone to make me homemade gifts and cards (if he didnt like the hamper we made i dread to think what he thought of the card i made lol)
i think xmas has become too much in the way of the biggest and the best!...how much can you spend on your kid etc i kinda thought that the way the economy is at the minute that that would have become less of an issue....oh how wrong can i be lol!!

red_devil

its very hard to please everyone all the time!

olipot

Well I hope you as a family had great fun preparing the hampers, its really sad the reaction you have had back, I feel so sorry for families suffering financially this time of the year you want to do your best but if the money isn't there there's little you can do, what you did was very very thoughtful and it saddens me that your hubby has been so upset by it all, if I was you I would show your relative all these friendly posts regarding the subject just so he can see where your friends are and what a selfish person he is, love and hugs to all of you and hope you have a good new year

pillion

How awful, how can anyone behave like that, I'm not sure I would give them anything next year. This year my father, who is in his 80s, spent considerably less on us and gave the money he didn't spend on us to Crisis. It made me feel so happy all Christmas Day that next year I would like him to donate all my Christmas present money to Crisis. Why don't you consider doing something similar, your family may complain but at least you will know that someone somewhere will be very grateful for your gift.

Queen.Bess

I am so angry on your behalf! This is just such an ungrateful attitude! My bro and his family are all ungrateful, but at least they wouldn't say it to my face! Although ironically my SIL seemed most appreciative of the lot of the homemade pot of growing hyacinth bulbs i gave her - note for the future for her!

Anyway, OH and I made hampers for friends this year with sloe gine, chutney, xmas pud and biscuits and they all seemed so appreciative of the thought that we will do it again next year!

I think the trick is to choose those people who will appreciate such things and sod those who don't!

Keep it up for next year for those you know will love what you have done and I'm so sorry that your Xmas may have been spoilt by this - please don't let it!

Gina_of_course!

I think you should give your bro in law something else.... a massive bag of pity.

I'd be tempted to write to him (with your OH's permission) to say how watching your OH get upset was devastating for you and his pain at his brothers words cut deep. I'd then go onto say that financially you are poles apart although even if you were millionaires you would not be opting into the consumerism and blatant oneupmanship that society has sadly in the main become.

I'd then go onto to say that should he wish for his children to learn with their cousin the meaning of |Christmas and to enhance their craft skills they were welcome to join in in making gifts for family members next year.

I'd finish it with something along the lines of, I'm hoping after not only the time that has past but after you thinking about your reaction to what was a gift of love that you can apologise to 'OH;s name..'. Have a great 2010,

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red_devil

Gina_of_course! wrote: »

I think you should give your bro in law something else.... a massive bag of pity.

I'd be tempted to write to him (with your OH's permission) to say how watching your OH get upset was devastating for you and his pain at his brothers words cut deep. I'd then go onto say that financially you are poles apart although even if you were millionaires you would not be opting into the consumerism and blatant oneupmanship that society has sadly in the main become.

I'd then go onto to say that should he wish for his children to learn with their cousin the meaning of |Christmas and to enhance their craft skills they were welcome to join in in making gifts for family members next year.

I'd finish it with something along the lines of, I'm hoping after not only the time that has past but after you thinking about your reaction to what was a gift of love that you can apologise to 'OH;s name..'. Have a great 2010,

...........................

i wouldnt advise writing at all it will only start world war 3 off as if it wasnt bad enough!

I wouldnt do anything now got a whole year to think about it and see what happens?

Sometimes with familys there are other issues as well as the one they have moaned about. It may be that there is a general problem not just about presents ifsyim. Families dont you just hate em!

wendywitch

How ungrateful!! :eek:
I wish someone would have spent the time and effort on me

Some times I wonder why I bother when others don't
I get fed up of hearing "oh you always get people such wonder presents" but all I do is choose things for the people I get for and not just buy something to give, if you get what I mean :rolleyes:
I'm fed up of gifts with no thought, my turn to rant - I might not have spent a fortune when buying for my bestfriend, her husband and their 4 children, but a chose gifts for each child, things I thought they would like and this year actually got a good reaction from them but I get the same disappointed looks and reactions from my best friend and her ESPECIALLY husband each year!
I wish I could be so rude back, but it's not in my nature. I know they don't have much money but neither do I but at least I put the effort in!
Maybe I'm the one being selfish but I really feel I'm going to "cut right down" next year, maybe a family gift is called for :rolleyes:,
YES that's exactly what I'm going to do ! :T

red_devil

i have sometimes found it better not to give and not to get anything back either it may be miserable but it saves alot of heartache! The money you dont spend on them you can buy yourself something you want!

There are always threads on forums about unwanted/unused presents etc its a shame. I saw one where a woman was complaining she got a washing up brush. At the end of the day she got one though and in the givers eyes that was the right thing to do! You cant please people all the time. We are all different.