Living My Life But(t) N.A.K.E.D.

Nottoobadyet

Oh swin, I know that feeling well! It can get tough when you get to that point where things just sort of roll on and dont match your target driven lifestyle!

I felt like that a while ago, after a period of being long distance OH and I got back to living in the same country and it felt like a long slog that was going no where and not being much fun. I felt cramped by being in a relationship, yet we both werent feeling very commitment friendly.

Eventually we got back to enjoying each others company and having a great time being together, just as we are. I dont ever want to get married or have children, so nothing is likely to happen to move us along to the pre-ordained levels of seriousness that were never really important to us anyway. And I learned to appreciate things that I can't track progress on a spredsheet :-)

Hope your sniffles go away, have a good weekend!

moo2moo

Alternatively you could view it that you do indeed have the best of both worlds. Once you live together every day things change and you miss having the bed to yourself or being able to go out with the girls at no notice just because you can without the hassle of it being your night to cook dinner and as an added bonus when OH has manflu he can sweat it out in his own bed without waking you up every five minutes to remind you hes ill. Best of all if Oh has his own place he also does his own cleaning and his own laundry. We moved in together and my OH miraculaously forgot what the laundry basket was for and as for the washing machine well the guy can mend a broken aeroplane but the whole separating whites and darks and turning the washing machine on thing is way beyond his capabilities.

Things never go quite the way you want them to but if you really do love him you'll find a compromise that makes you happy. Things evolve slowly for good reason.

ps. you can't flog him on E-bay that goes against their human trafficking policy however if you're handy with a chainsaw you can sell some human remains and body parts although they're a bit choosy with what is and isn't acceptable. http://pages.ebay.com/help/policies/remains.html

Shoe_Gal

moo2moo wrote: »

Alternatively you could view it that you do indeed have the best of both worlds. Once you live together every day things change and you miss having the bed to yourself or being able to go out with the girls at no notice just because you can without the hassle of it being your night to cook dinner and as an added bonus when OH has manflu he can sweat it out in his own bed without waking you up every five minutes to remind you hes ill. Best of all if Oh has his own place he also does his own cleaning and his own laundry. We moved in together and my OH miraculaously forgot what the laundry basket was for and as for the washing machine well the guy can mend a broken aeroplane but the whole separating whites and darks and turning the washing machine on thing is way beyond his capabilities.

Things never go quite the way you want them to but if you really do love him you'll find a compromise that makes you happy. Things evolve slowly for good reason.

ps. you can't flog him on E-bay that goes against their human trafficking policy however if you're handy with a chainsaw you can sell some human remains and body parts although they're a bit choosy with what is and isn't acceptable. http://pages.ebay.com/help/policies/remains.html

Fab post - really well said

And love the last bit :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

savingwannabe

I get pigeons on my roof making a noise all the time. My friend had squirrels inside her roof once. It is best to get someone in to check it out. As far as i am aware mousie's cannot climb that high?????!!!!

Good luck, :j

Swinstie73

Evening all and hi to savingwannabe, getting lax with my updates recently. It is snowing here again, lying quite heavy as I type, eek!

Anyway, pest control man came out on Monday and had a check of the loft, didn't see any droppings or footprints, I know footprints, was wondering why there would be size 9's up there, but hey ho! He put down some poison anyway and will check back in 4 weeks, I'm quite happy knowing something has been done anyway but hoping nothing dies up there, yuk!

Well said moo2moo about moving in stuff, I agree with everyone i.e. having your own space etc. My problem is OTHER people questioning when we are moving in, getting engaged, getting married, having kids so it's almost like I feel the need to conform along with wondering what is wrong with me that these things aren't happening.

After a long discussion though we are (especially this long weekend) looking forward to spending some quality time together, 5 days and nights to be exact so maybe by next week I will be posting saying we are NOT moving in together, ha!

My financial situation will hopefully be cleared by the end of the year so there will be no concrete plans made before then, we have our holiday to look forward to in June and hopefully many more nice weekends or nights out. I just wish we stayed a bit closer though, my sister and her OH live in the same town (separate houses) but spend more time together, and she likes time on her own, I don't have the option of just nipping up to see him IYSWIM! But I seem to get the time on my own alot.

*sneaks away to read ebay rules on selling human body parts*

P.S. I know which part I'll be keeping *nudge nudge, wink wink*

urg123

P.S. I know which part I'll be keeping *nudge nudge, wink wink*

And of course you'll be keeping his hands to hold!!! The filth that goes on on MSE sometimes! tee hee

Glad you are looking forward to some quality time together.

urg x x

Swinstie73

Evening all, you can tell I'm on hols tomorrow, cos I'm up late, yeah! Off til next Wednesday and got a few things planned, nothing too exciting but happy to be spending time with OH.

Phoned an acquaintance today as she was expecting and due last November but hadn't heard from her (was scared to call as she's lost two babies), but everything was peachy, she has a little girl. Of course, she said it would be my turn next and it really made me ponder our decision again, can't recall saying what that was, but basically we will not be having kids. He has an 18 year old and doesn't want to start again, I've never wanted kids so at the end of the day, I'd rather our relationship blossomed (it's only been 3 years) than end things, TRY to meet someone else when I'm not 100% sure having kids is right for me. I still feel kid-like myself and TBH, we have LOADS of things we want to do, holidays to go on etc. Sometimes I feel like I'd be missing out, but then again, you don't miss what you don't have. The girl I spoke to said I'd change my mind (she did) but I know I won't and having a kid to conform to the norm is just not for me. Although 1% of me will always wonder, 99% of me is sure. I love OH so could never end the relationship for a 'what if' scenario.

Feel better now getting that out in the open. Ok off to bed, got loads to do tomorrow, shopping, lunching, lazing around, ah bliss. Nite all x

ETA: Of course I meant keeping his hands to hold Urg!!!

urg123

Hey Swinstie

Must be really hard with everyone placing their norms on you and for you to be polite all the time while they question your decision. YOu stick with what you want - and if you want to change your mind in the future - well that's your prerogative.

Enjoy your day off.

urg x x

moo2moo

You don't have to physically give birth to bond with a child and see what shes on about. As far as my two delightful oiks are concerned mummy nad daddy are the two people in thier lives who are always there and who pick up the pieces when the world comes to an end (DD2s boyfriend dumped her for another 7 year old) or when they're ill and projectile vomiting over everything and everyone in sight ( a puke covered cat is a very angry cat).

Daddys friend D on the otherhand is as close to God-like status as its possible to achieve. Hes single, has no children, appears once every 6-8 weeks, spends 48 hours with them and treats them like princessess and they adore him. Everythings D this and D that, they come running home from school with something special and put it safe for the next time D comes to stay. They love the fact that mummy says its bedtime and D sneaks in one extra story. He gets all the love and hugs that a small child can bestow unconditionally upon a person without the chauffeuring duties and the dirty nappies and the nits and the worms and the vomit and the impaling of feet on the pointy boobs of a Barbie at 3am in pitch black. Children are wonderful things but even nicer when they're someone elses and you can hand them back tired and grumpy and sit in peace with a chilled glass of chardonnay until the next time you want to borrow one.

You only get one life, make sure its the one that makes you happy as theres only you living it not your mother or your friends.

Swinstie73

Hi all,

Well feeling a lot more positive with regards to our situation, moo2moo everything you said was very true, I do have 5 nieces and nephews and my mum is one of the ones who isn't going on about me having kids, she had 5 of her own and knows how hard it is. The occasional comment crops up but nothing major, it's more people at work who pass judgement. Even my friends, one with a kid and one without can see where I'm coming from.

OH on his way down as I type, fatality at Edinburgh station so couldn't get his normal train, not so good.

Got a wee bit of good news today, took a gold necklace (14ct) into the jewellers today to get it valued for selling, bought years ago in Barbados and never been worn once. He said he'd give me £180 for it, I was well chuffed as I think I paid about £200 for it years and years ago. Then he said if I took it into Glasgow I could probably get about £250 for it as it's in brilliant condition and could be re-sold instead of smelted. Was hoping to go into Glasgow on Saturday so will be well pleased if could get more for it, even if I don't £180 is not to be sniffed at is it?!

Well better go and pick up OH, his train should be rolling in soon. Have a great Easter everyone x