am i missing somthing (mrs dazzanator)

Sea78

Hi & welcome!

I know that when I first posted my SOA and I got some replies, I did take them personally and feel they were harsh - but now I see that actually they weren't harsh (but I haven't read the comment you're referring to yet I'm afraid) and were instead letting me know that it would be hard to get debt free adn that if I hadn't eniough coming in to cover the bills then there wasn't space for 2 mobiles etc in my life!! I think with Sky, like other things, it's fine if youcan afford it (and get the best deal and actually watch the channels you get) but sometimes, when people are in difficulty, they can't afford it but insist on keeping it - like me and Slimming World class - can't afford it but really want to keep going, will be giving it up and losing weight for free!

I hope this has helped...and isn't too confusing!!

Sea xx

Broken_hearted

dazzanator wrote:

hi thankyou for you kind words could you please tell csa is and why bankrupcty and benifits and sky wind people up here thanks mrs dazzanator

They are all highly emotional areas
CSA- breakups, divorce and kids trapped in the middle
Bankruptsy-2 groups 1 see it as the easy way out,2 see it as the soul destroying end to their fight to get debt free
Benefits-again 2 camps. Those who have no choice to be on them and those who disaprove
Sky- a waste of money

Emmzi

CSA = child support agency. Fights arise between 'being forced to pay unreasonable amounts by evil government/ evil spouse' camp and 'evil ex should be made to pay his/her whack' camp


Living on benefits -fight between 'you had 'em so pay for 'em!' camp and 'Victim of unfortunate circumstances' camp

Bankruptcy - fight between 'it's the easy way out, you spent it so pay for it' camp' and 'it's there to help people like me isn't it?' camp

Sky -fight between 'What a waste ofmoney' camp and 'it's my only entertainment' camp


This list is not exhaustive, and there are many sub-camps within the camps! And this is only my opinion of what I see.

I may have just started a minor riot there

Kevicho

I dont think anybody here can be classed as being two faced, we all offer guniune advice and opinions, sometimes people may not like to hear what we say but its there choice to take the advice we give and either use it, or not.

Money is such an emotive subject, what may seem reasonable to one person may see bizarre and even completely stupid by another.

Some people are more polite in how they word things but not everyone can be as diplomatic.

Sea78

Broken_hearted wrote:

They are all highly emotional areas
CSA- breakups, divorce and kids trapped in the middle
Bankruptsy-2 groups 1 see it as the easy way out,2 see it as the soul destroying end to their fight to get debt free
Benefits-again 2 camps. Those who have no choice to be on them and those who disaprove
Sky- a waste of money

I think with bankcruptcy people only get upset when it's seen by the debtor as the easy way out - not working at the reasons why they became in debt to that extent. i'm not sure if many really believe it's an easy way out as from what I've seen on here it's a terrible emtional wrrecking journey. Also in the forums, the odd poster who comes on looking for a quick fix won't get a very good response on quick fixes- more likely to get advice on life changes!!

Sea xx

all_hours

There's a difference between spending £75 on a night out and a possibly once in a lifetime opportunity to go to the World Cup.

Thriftylady

Broken_hearted wrote:

Benefits-again 2 camps. Those who have no choice to be on them and those who disaprove

I think there might be more than 2 camps when it comes to benefits, its a very complex issue but there are at least:

1)those who have no choice to be on them
2)those who disapprove of them
3)those who feel that its their right to have them

I think that broadly speaking, most people understand that there are those who fall into category 1, but there is a feeling that there are significant numbers of people who fall into category 3, therefore many other people fall into category 2! (which is not at all helpful for those in category 1, who would give anything not to be on benefits).

Anastacia

Plus, if we all agreed then it wouldnt be much of a chat forum, would it. You really need a few different opinions on things to get the best of it.

I like the hugs messages & also the kick up the bum messages, just depends what i need at the time.

I havnt seen the threads referred to but I would think that we probably meant dont waste cash for treats left right & centre but once every 4 years is acceptable. Sounds 100% okay to me. Enjoy yourself SS.

Anastacia.

MCBIRNIE25

Interesting topic.
I think everyone is so passionate over this site, and genuinely wants to help that they offer advice based on their own experience. I am 99.99% sure that the posters would not have been making personal attackes, but rather basing things on their own experiences and wanting to help.
Besides, how boring if we all agreed. I for one, am glad we all have different ways and methods, and some people do need more of a gee up than other people. If anybody does find a posting offensive then come and discuss it, and keep this forum alive. Even advice which is not right for me, may make alrm bells ring in somebody elses head thinking " Oh my god, that's me" i think all postings are constructive to different people.
Long live free speech.

Littlemiss-lotsofdebt

I read one of the thread's the OP was referring to, and must admit, was still thinking about Miss K's response in the shower this morning (I must get out more!). I thought that her response was a little harsh also, and it concerned me that it may have put the person off visiting the boards again after receiving such a response.

I respect people's right to have an opinion, but also think, people should be respectful of each other's feelings.