Tricky situation

Craftyscholar

OJQ1982 wrote: »

Myself and him are British. His girlfriend isn't though.

So did she move to further her career or to save their relationship?

squirrelchops

In all my time on MSE I have never had cause to say this before but OP you don't really give a monkeys what anyone else says as it is SO obvious you have made up your mind already and what some kind of agreement with you.

However, the good people on MSE aren't going to pander to your every whim. You are in a totally absurd destructive relationship. You are clinging on to a maybe, a what if....a 'in the future'......all based on some man who is dangling you like a charm and you keep sleeping with him for his gratification as a bit on the side.

Get a grip, open your eyes and MOVE ON.

OJQ1982

Craftyscholar wrote: »

So did she move to further her career or to save their relationship?

To further her career. They had been split since very early this year. She has come to this country for further study but lives at the opposite end of the country to us.

verysillyguy06

OJQ1982 wrote: »

To further her career. They had been split since very early this year. She has come to this country for further study but lives at the opposite end of the country to us.[/QUOTE]


Stop kidding yourself...there is 'no' US......


There is you and a guy who is in a ' committed' relationship....

OJQ1982

verysillyguy06 wrote: »

OJQ1982 wrote: »

To further her career. They had been split since very early this year. She has come to this country for further study but lives at the opposite end of the country to us.[/QUOTE]


Stop kidding yourself...there is 'no' US......


There is you and a guy who is in a ' committed' relationship....

The use of the term "us" is used as an English pronoun. Not to describe a relationship. If I was talking about me and the man at the bus stop I would use the term "us"

thorsoak

I just don't understand why you posted in the first place? Do you want approval for what you are doing?

Whatever happened to just saying "hold on - you're sleeping with someone else - it's wrong to have two partners"????

OJQ1982

It's all become pretty academic now anyway.
I had a phone call late last night from him, he wasn't going to see his parents at all, he was going to see his girlfriend to break up with her.
He called me to tell me how he felt about me, and was pretty convinced I wouldn't feel the same.
He said he knew I just wanted him for casual sex (!) but that he had fallen for me and couldn't carry on the way things were. He said he had tried to supress his feelings in order to make things work with his girlfriend but that what we have is too special to forget about.
We are going to take it slowly as both of us are a bit fragile at the moment anyway.
We were on the phone until about 3am. He's getting the train back this morning and we are going to see each other this afternoon to discuss things properly.
I'm so relieved, I knew it wasn't possible that it was just me feeling this way.
Thanks for all posts, I know what we were doing was wrong but it's over between them now. I had a phone call from another friend this morning to tell me his ex had called her in the middle of the night crying and saying he had broken up with her, so I know he's not lying.

squirrelchops

I think this post was a wind up and now the OP has given the reason to have to post anymore as there is now the happy ending.

1,2,3 all together now...

'AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH'.

OJQ1982

squirrelchops wrote: »

I think this post was a wind up and now the OP has given the reason to have to post anymore as there is now the happy ending.

1,2,3 all together now...

'AAAAHHHHHHHHHHH'.

That's fine to be honest if you think that.
It's not really a happy ending at all, is it? There is a broken hearted ex girlfriend, all our friends who we now have to tell we have been lying to them etc.
It's a better situation than yesterday but not entirely resolved. I will know more when I see him, telephone conversations are never as open as face to face ones.
I'm not sure why I would waste my time posting again if I wanted a reason not to post? I would just not log back on.

squirrelchops

Well exactly...you didn't give a monkeys about the ex or your friends etc when you were sleeping with him so don't try and make out you have a conscience now.

If i were in your situtution (although incredibly unlikely) I would alwasy be wondering if he would end up lying and cheating again. how can you begin a relationship when so much of it has been based on deceit and dishonesty. As trust is one fo the key values in any realtionship I woudl aks myself if this is the type of man who I really think is the 'one'.