Is this unreasonable re maintenance?

Kimitatsu

As you have two children then he is liable for 20% of his net income (after tax, national insurance and half of his pension contributions), so that is where the 20% comes in

If having used the online calculator and he is laible for £550 and you are happy to accept £400 a week then I think that is what you need to point out to him. If he starts to get grumpy about it (great phrase thats what my solicitor used to call my ex when he was being a pain lol) then put in a claim to the CSA and let them decide what it should be.

Kellogs36 is the resident CSA guru, she may be able to shed more light on the ruling of more then £2000 a week as its not something I am familiar with, but will look it up for you later on;)

Take care of yourself and those gorgeous girlies :A

GobbledyGook

karen24 wrote: »

I believe you're entitled to tax credits too. Child maintenance is not taken into account when you apply.

I was told that wouldn't apply with the amount of maintenance he should pay? I was told that with that amount and my wage I wouldn't be entitled. I've never claimed tax credits before because of his wages.

I just want to work out a fair amount. I know that the girls and I won't have the same lifestyle anymore which is fine by me, but I don't want them going without when he fritters away most of his wages (his choice I know, but he should be providing his children with a good lifestyle as they were planned and he can afford it). I just want to know where I stand because everyone and their dog seems to have an opinion and say I should go for lots of money and that the girls and I should have stayed in the house.

I don't have plans to rush into any divorce proceedings or anything yet. I just want to do the best for my babies.

Loopy_Girl

Is there not a cap anyway on earnings they will take into account? I can't for the life of me remember it (maybes someone else will) but I do recall that there is a cap on very high earners i.e there comes a point when income is not used for an assessment.

GobbledyGook

You could be right Loopy - it's one of the reasons he said he's not keen on divorcing for as long as very possible as he thinks he may be worse off going through court than just between ourselves (although I'd have thought it would have been the same?)

Kimitatsu

You would not be eligible for tax credits whilst you were together BUT now you will certainlly be eligible for child tax credits and as long as you work over 16 hours a week for working tax credits.

This from advice guide:

Who can get Child Tax Credit

You can get Child Tax Credit if you are 16 or over and you are responsible for at least one child. This means a child under 16, or a young person up to the age of 19 who is in full-time education up to A level or equivalent, or on certain approved training courses. You may also get Child Tax Credit for a young person who has been accepted on one of these courses. You can also get Child Tax Credit for a young person aged under 18 who has registered with the Careers Service, if they have left school within the last 20 weeks.
Financial eligibility

The amount of Child Tax Credit you get will depend on your circumstances and your income. You can get it on quite high gross incomes, including incomes of over £50,000 a year. If you live with your partner, your incomes will be added together when your claim is assessed. Gross income means what your income is before tax and national insurance are deducted.
Savings do not affect your entitlement directly but, if you are getting interest from your savings, this is counted as income and will affect the amount of Child Tax Credit due.
Some of your income will not be taken into account when your Child Tax Credit is being worked out. Child Benefit, maintenance payments, Maternity Allowance will be disregarded together with most Statutory Maternity Pay, Statutory Paternity Pay and Statutory Adoption Pay.

Homestly everyone and their dog WILL have an opinion but as long as you are happy with everything then no one else matters When you finally get divorced then both houses would have been put into the pot so unlike a straight forwards divorce with only one property where you would have been given the majority share you would have no guarantee of that. If you are happy living where you are and the girls are happy then stay there, you know its yours and wont be taken away, so you keep that continuity.

You will probably be awarded a proportion of the marital home and he will have the choice to buy you out of it, personally though I think you have done the right thing, you have no mortgage on the property and your bills sound managable.

At the end of the day your girls are still very young and you will have to see their Dad for the next 20+ years at school events, weddings, funerals, graduation cermonies etc, if you can keep it civil for their sake it saves a lot of hassle (and solicitors bills) in the long run.

If I were you I would take legal advice but tell them you are not in a hurry to start divorce proceedings just want to get a view on the finances and what you would be entitled to as proceeds of the marriage. That way you have covered all of your bases and have protected yourself and your girls.

Loopy_Girl

Yes but the courts don't have to decide your CS - you can either do a private arrangement or do it through the CSA and then press on with the divorce (if that's what you both want)

Personally I think the offer on the table from you is reasonable.

What kinda speaking terms are we on? Strained or reasonable enough?

You could calmly point out that it was him that wanted the girls to go to a particular nursery and that they shouldn't lose out just because Mum and Dad have split up.

Have you suggested the £400 - is he open to this?

You are being reasonable and he could be made to pay alot more and I also agree that the money should be paid to you and not the nursery. It is your CS and you distribute it as you see fit.

Loopy_Girl

Ah right....have just re-read your original post and he's not happy with the £400

What figure DID he have in mind?

Is he still contributing to the mortgage?

Does he still see the girls regularly and is he buying them things like clothes and shoes and stuff?

zzzLazyDaisy

Child maintenance is not taken into account for either working tax credits or council tax benefit, so make that your priority as at least then you will have a regular steady income that you can rely on.

As far a maintenance goes, In my view he should pay whatever the CSA website says. After all, if you were together, he would be paying a lot more than 20% of his wages to look after you and his kids - and more to the point, you wouldn't be struggling to survive on your wages and benefits, while he swans off into the sunset.

They are HIS children too, but from what you say, YOU are going to be the person who provides for their physical and emotional wellbeing. Don't under-estimate how hard that will be - don't make it harder for yourself because you want to be independent and/or because you don't want to be seen as a money-grabber. He will play on that - all you are asking for is what your children are legally entitled to. Hopefully he will wake up and come to a sensible and grown up arrangement with you to provide for his children but if not, you may just need to tough it out.

GobbledyGook

Thank you.

We're on kinda speaking terms. He keeps accusing me of being snappy with him - I don't know what he expects a month after he ended our marriage without any blooming warning. It's pretty reasonable, I just want to know where I stand so I can sort out myself and my girls.

I suggested £400 based on the calculator and he called it extortion. When I pointed out than more than half of that was nursery fees he told me to move her to a different nursery that's cheaper and claim tax credits as I have a responsibility to pay too. I told him I'd look into both our responsibilities and get back to him with a couple of different options to see what was best. He is also going to get some advice too, so hopefully they'll make him realise I'm not being unfair.

I will look into the tax credits situation, thank you for that I. I wouldn't have thought we were entitled at all thanks.

The house is the thing everyone keeps going on about. They all think he should have moved out as it's a 6 bed family home in a lovely area and we're now in a 2 bed flat in a not so nice area (although I grew up here so don't mind the area).

I'm trying to keep things civil, we've got a long way to go. I just don't want my girls to lose out because we've fallen apart - even though I'm not entirely sure how, when or why we've done so. Thanks again.

GobbledyGook

Loopy_Girl wrote: »

Ah right....have just re-read your original post and he's not happy with the £400

What figure DID he have in mind?

Is he still contributing to the mortgage?

Does he still see the girls regularly and is he buying them things like clothes and shoes and stuff?

He doesn't know. He gave me £500 to sort out the move and "stuff" last month and just wants to know how much I "want", but thinks £400 is way too high.

He is paying the mortgage because he is living in the house. The flat we are in has no mortgage so nothing to pay there.

He is seeing the girls maybe once a week. Hasn't bought them anything, but it's only been a month so they haven't needed anything.