What would you do?

meltdown_point

hi poppyplivia,

Not been invited:(
Its only staff!! Their ward is closing on new years eve and they are all being deployed to other wards!
Every year its staff only:)

[Deleted User]

The after party won't be staff only though

meltdown_point

ringo_24601 wrote: »

The after party won't be staff only though

Your probably right, but I do trust him and I know he wouldnt do anything. His marriage broke up because his ex wife was having an affair with his so called best friend and he has always said that it was his lowest point in his whole life.

Stephb1986_2

Men eh they are selfish pigs! Mine is in the dog house at the moment too so don't get me started on men grrr!

You should kick him out of bed and make him sleep on the sofa! You must be wonder woman to have 4 kids!!! I can't cope with kids either lol!

I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes well.

Take care of yourself

Steph xx

meltdown_point

Thank you Steph:)

mummy_Jay

It's strange he's not wanting to interact with your bump. could your 1/2 miscarrage have scared him and now he's worried about bonding with the bump just incase?

As for the comment, men can be really insensive, put him on the sofa your the pregnant one not him, he needs to learn to be less selfish especially with a new addition about to arrive.

Re the party you trust him, so ask him where he's going to be taking you out to, to make up for that. And remind him you don't expect him to be drinking just incase you need him, as you are so far along.

Also tell him how hard your finding the pregnancy and his attitude is making it far worse than it needs to be. He's a nurse he should understand that the unecessary stress he's putting on you is risky for both you and the baby.

kimmi_b

Hi meltdownpoint

Didn't want to read and run. It sounds to me like you have a valid reason to be mad, but something that would blow over quite quickly has been exacerbated(sp?) by pregnancy hormones. I would sit him down and talk to him about how he has made you feel. As for the party, I would not be happy about it either. If he is attending a Christmas work do with them I'd feel that he shouldn't need to attend an after party as well, or at least just stay for a bit to show his face and then come back home to you.

During both my pregnancies my partner wouldn't touch my stomach to feel the kicks (he did it once and in his words "it feels horrible, like an alien"), wouldn't talk to bump or anything like that. He came to all scans and the first midwife appointment, plus the first appt when you hear the heartbeat. After that I was left to go in by myself while he waited in the car! TBH I was glad of it - better than sitting in a doctors office and listening to him moaning about how hot it was in there The second pregnancy was different as we went to several hospital scans as, like you, there was a concern over the growth of the baby (7lbs 7oz of lushness in the end!).

So despite his annoying me throughout first pregnancy with his lack of interest, and second through again not wanting to touch "my freaky stomach", he has always been an exemplary father and partner.

I can understand why you aren't feeling at your best right now - I was the same - felt fat, unattractive and all stretchmarky I still look the same now only with a smaller but baggier stomach! And with both my pregnancies I had to go to a Spring wedding when only 2 weeks away from giving birth :P Nothing worse than being surrounded by skinny minnies in their floaty frocks.

If you don't want to go to the after party, then maybe you could treat yourself to some foxy nightwear, a slinky maternity camisole or something similar to lift your spirits...and maybe something else of his?!

Good luck with the rest of your pregnancy

meltdown_point

It could be mummy_jay, I had went in for a dating scan at 11am that morning and at 2pm i was bleeeding quite badly, Dp was doing a patient transfer 100 miles away and the ambulance broke down! he did get up to the hospital at 7pm that evening (i was in pieces as they told me that am everything was ok then i was being told that afternoon that nothing could be done and let nature take its place) But im still pregnant and everything is going well (apart from the baby being too big:))
I hope and pray that he bonds with the baby when its here.....I think he will:D

Im just hurt because he thinks that there is nothing wrong with being totally honest.......he sees it as being open and truthful.......I see it as he just doesnt think about my feelings when he opens his mouth....I cant make him see how he is making me feel....and im dreading this coming back up in an arguement and biting me in the ars e IYKWIM!!

kegg_2

Stephb1986 wrote: »

Men eh they are selfish pigs! Mine is in the dog house at the moment too so don't get me started on men grrr!

You should kick him out of bed and make him sleep on the sofa! You must be wonder woman to have 4 kids!!! I can't cope with kids either lol!

I hope the rest of your pregnancy goes well.

Take care of yourself

Steph xx

probably said because you are having a row with your fella at the moment but no where has the op said her oh has kicked her out the bed.

Looks like no one should be sleeping on the sofa as there has been no real row or break down just a over tired pregnant woman having a bad day.

Op will probably feel a lot better if she goets into bed and has a cuddle with her oh.

meltdown_point

Hi kimmi_b

He isnt interested in the bedroom dept.....thats the truth! Before i fell pregnant it caused millions of arguements....he is exhausted after work....he has been working constantly for the past year! I have a high sex drive that he was unable to keep up with....but something worked;)
Im not unattractive but im no supermodel....I was a size 6/8 before i fell pregnant and now the size 8 maternity clothes are looking and feeling tight!! Im scared that i wont "bounce" back into shape after baby is born..(i did with the others) but this time im massive and i feel massive....I suppose i just want him to tell me that he will love me no matter what...im massivly insecure atm, and this feeling is new to me but sometimes when DP comments on my size he is like sure you will get back into shape in no time......if not we can walk it off you! Grrrr im getting all welled up here again!!