What would you do?

meltdown_point

Hello All,

I am posting under a different user name......for lots of reasons!

Im sorry......I need help

Story so far

I am 29 weeks pregnant
I am living with my partner.....in my own house
He is a nurse
I am a housewife and mother of four kids
I have stepped into the roll of stepmum to his 2 children as he has with my kids.

My partner has said a few things in this past 2 weeks that have really hurt and peeved me off

This is a rant i suppose.....I know im pregnant and the hormones are all over the place BUT I want to know what you think please!!

ok 2 nights ago we had an arguement and it ended up with him apologising for upsetting me......I was kinda complaining that my belly was tight and soreish mainly the skin......(rem i have 4 kids already)...he told me to moisturise, I just said no honestly i wasnt in the mood...tired, really tired ect he said that i would thank him for it in 6 years when i was complaining of stretchmarks:rolleyes: I said that sure it didnt matter about stretchmarks as he would love me anyway CUE him saying to me did I not want to look nice for him:eek: so the arguement then turned into a full blown war when he said that he does everything for me to make sure i have an easy pregnancy (he does do lots) but i do lots for him too.....I then asked him why he never comes to appointments with me or why does he not show an interest in our baby..(they were concerned that baby was too small then at the weighing scan the consultant said it was too big and had i been checked for gestational diabetes) he doesnt touch my belly when baby kicks he can see baby kicking he said!! he doesnt listen to its movements or even talk to baby when its awake!! (ex OH always done this and never missed an appointment but i have never said this to my partner sometimes there can be too much tmi IYKWIM) Cue me sleeping on the sofa!!

I have been offish with him since then and today we were texting each other as normal (cause im useless that way, i need some sort of adult company) and getting on fine......he was working a double so 7am to 9pm he comes home at 9.45 and proceeds to tell me about his day.....great going fine then he tells me that after his christmas do he is going to a party in a girls house, and looked at me and said "what?"(i must have had a face) I said i wasnt happy about that and he went off on one telling me that it is his last ward xmas do and that he has never given me any reason to mistrust him....thats very true i said but telling your girlfriend that your going to a girls house for an after party when she is going to be nearly ready to have a baby isnt really on.....esp after he told me that i should make an effort for him Grrrr we havnt went out as a couple in AGES......sex is another matter when i try to talk to him about our non existent sex life him he says dont start! things are good between us atm

Right go on is it me???

meltdown_point

Anyone??
Im on the settee tonight again so I will be up for a while!

kegg_2

I think you are probably being a bit over senstive due to your hormones going haywire mixed with running a home and looking after 4 kids.

meltdown_point

Thanks Kegg:)

LisaLou1982

(

I didnt want to read and run......

You might have hormones flying all over the place but im not pregnant, and if my OH mentioned something negative about me not wanting to look nice for him, i probably would not be happy at ALL!!!!

Dont sleep on the sofa - go back to bed and make him sleep downstairs!

I would definately agree with not saying anything about how your ex was with baby appointments etc....not a good idea as he'll take it the wrong way although maybe a few more subtle hints might make him see sense?


Hope youre ok tho....x

Kirri

Hmm even if you are being a bit sensitive, I don't think he's helping.. ie could he not check with you re the party - after all he is just expecting you to look after his kids that night, ie you are together as a family, he's not really able to live the single life so would be nice if he could make an effort to check with you if he's going out all night rather than just assume..

plus you want sex and he won't? I'd not be happy either.. (and guys who say 'don't start' really irritate me!!) he's also not being very tactful about the potential stretchmarks and also re the party, especially if you haven't both been out as a couple in ages - is that not possible (ie with the kids) or is it more he doesn't want to?

He might not mean anything wrong, but I don't think he's handling sensitive issues very well..

meltdown_point

Thank you lisa lou

I know its hormones!
but im comfy now and tomorrow when he comes home from work i will sit him down and have a chat to him....:)

Agutka

Morning!
I'd say hormones... I've been going round for the past few weeks telling everyone and anyone how much I hate OH. It's not funny anymore.
In my last pregnancy he infuriated me that he seldom wanted to feel the kicking. Just not interested. So this time round I'm keeping it all to myself, hah!

Mother of four kids - get some sleep woman! You'll feel loads better in a few months time :rolleyes:

meltdown_point

Kirri wrote: »

Hmm even if you are being a bit sensitive, I don't think he's helping.. ie could he not check with you re the party - after all he is just expecting you to look after his kids that night, ie you are together as a family, he's not really able to live the single life so would be nice if he could make an effort to check with you if he's going out all night rather than just assume..his eldest comes and goes as he pleases he maybe stays here 3/4 times per week sometimes more if he and his mum have had an arguement:rolleyes: he is nearly 17......his youngest hasnt been since sept as he was caught stealing from my credit card and his mum said that our rules dont apply to her house....I cant argue with that (im not allowed to:rotfl:) his youngest is 14 and every time his dad goes to pick him up his mum says you dont have to go if you dont want to, he is quite happy to sit home and play computer games all day!

plus you want sex and he won't? I'd not be happy either.. (and guys who say 'don't start' really irritate me!!) he's also not being very tactful about the potential stretchmarks and also re the party, especially if you haven't both been out as a couple in ages - is that not possible (ie with the kids) or is it more he doesn't want to? this is more my fault:o im big and bulky atm and im not comfortable going into pubs with all the slim pretty girls around me.....I even won tickets to a concert and gave them to my partners brother as firstly my partner said he didnt like the group and secondly again im big and bulky and they are seated tickets near the back......i dont fancy clambering over people!!

He might not mean anything wrong, but I don't think he's handling sensitive issues very well..

Thank you x

meltdown_point

Agutka wrote: »

Morning!
I'd say hormones... I've been going round for the past few weeks telling everyone and anyone how much I hate OH. It's not funny anymore.
In my last pregnancy he infuriated me that he seldom wanted to feel the kicking. Just not interested. So this time round I'm keeping it all to myself, hah!

Mother of four kids - get some sleep woman! You'll feel loads better in a few months time :rolleyes:

I hope so:o This has been a horrid pregnancy so far..(I love being pregnant) but this time its so different....it started of as a multiple pregnancy and i miscarried 1/2 at 7 weeks (consultant said when she was shining a torch up my nether regions that there was a lot of blood for one miscarriage) Im happy that im still pregnant and im hoping that I have a boy (just noticed your sig) i have 3 boys already and they are SO much easier:p my little girl is hard work!!!
I would love to have your attitude........im gonna try!!

poppyolivia

not sure if its ben mentioned but I would say since you guys are argueing that you should go to the party with him, get dolled up!