A Valleys Adventure

starnac

well i feel a bit pants today. have been in work all weekend and am not feeling very well but i also found out today that DH has another credit card he hasn't told me about with just under £2k on it. i'm not very happy about it to be honest cos i suspected he had a second one a couple of months ago but when i asked him about it he promised he only had the one. i know what he'll say if i ask him. he feels guilty that he doesn't have a proper job and i'm the one who's paying all our bills and debts. his male pride is wounded. he'll say he didn't tell me cos he didn't want me to worry. i ALWAYS worry so what difference would it make??????

i opened my sealed pot today and had a very rubbish £24.10 in it! i didn't do the full year but i was def hoping for more than that. i must do better next year. it starts again on wednesday and i will do it for the full year and i will have a total in 3 figures this time.

so all in all a bit of a pants day today although i did manage to make a payment of just under £200 bringing my paid so far total to just under £8k.

must go update my signature

catspaw

From an ex vallys girl to one still there...hi. I will be subscribibg to see how you get along

beanielou

Keep plodding hun.
Its hard going but worth in the end.

starnac

hi catspaw. we've only just moved back here after living up north for 8 years. but it is nice to be back.

hi beanielou thanks for the encouragement.

I’ve made a plan. Surprising what time you have when you work nights! I’m not going to confront DH about his extra c/c, I want him to come to me about it. So what I’ve decided is all the extra money I make in a month will go towards paying it off. I will send the extra payments to his card and see how long it takes for him to notice. Wow it actually sounds like a pretty crappy plan now I’ve written it down. It’s surprising what sounds good in your head but actually turns out to be a really stupid idea. I suppose that was the idea of starting a diary in the first place - to have somewhere to come to gather my thoughts.

Okay the balance on the card is £1961.67 and so far I have got £53.55 saved to be used as an overpayment. The money was meant for the car loan but that will have to wait until I completely wipe out this extra c/c. For the first payment I thought it would be nice to round it down to under the £1900 mark just to get it going. Ideally this needs to be paid off before we apply for a mortgage which we were hoping to be next summer. That gives us about 8 months :eek: So it’s going to be pretty hard work to save for our deposit and pay off this c/c. I’m really hoping it’s worth it!

Quick calculations:
£53.55 saved leaves £8.12 to find by the end of the week. This will come out of my cleaning money
1961.67/8months (taking us to August) = £245.20 a month :eek:
Once I pay off the £61.67 that leaves £183.53 left to find by the end of the month. Wish me luck.

catspaw

mmmmmm, only problem with wiping out your OH cc is what happens if all he does is spend it again? Might it be better to save the money, wait till he comes to you about it, clear it totally and then make him cut up the card/cancel it in front of you.

starnac

yeah i know that's the problem. i really don't think he will spend it again as he hates the situation we are in. he's just really embarrassed about it. to be honest we need to talk about it but i'm just not sure how to approach the subject

starnac

i know for a fact that he hasn't used it in 12 months but he has only been paying the minimum payment. not having a job has really hit his male pride i think and that's probably one of the reasons he hasn't come to me. he doesn't want me sorting out his problems. he's told me that before. stupid men and their stupid pride

catspaw

Oh the wonders of male pride.....and I hate to say it, but it is worse in the Valleys

starnac

catspaw wrote: »

Oh the wonders of male pride.....and I hate to say it, but it is worse in the Valleys

he's not even a valley's boy!! he's a manc!

i asked him tonight straight out how much he owed on his other c/c and he told me straight up that he's paid it off. now it sounds awful but i don't actually believe him. although this is the 2nd time now he has told me that he's paid it off. i gave him plenty of chances to admit to me that he still had it. i even tried making him feel guilty by talking about honesty in a marriage. he looked a bit guilty but he still stuck by his story. so i'll give him the benefit of the doubt for now.

but if i find out that he's still got it by the time we apply for a mortgage i will not be a happy bunny :mad: and he will pay it all off by himself.

that leaves the money i've saved so far to make an overpayment can now go to the car loan. i'll try to make that over the weekend. can't do it tonight as i'm at work and haven't brought my card reader. i'll go update my signature now to show my car loan. bye

starnac

well he finally admitted to still having the c/c. he admitted it this morning when i got home from work. apparently he'd been up most of the night (i was in work) worrying over it. at least now he's admitted it and apologised for lying about it. he said he felt awful that i've done so well paying off our debts this year and he hasn't been able to do much to help. anyway we had a big talk about it and we both got a load of our chest.

i told him the reason i've worked so hard to pay off our debts this year is cos i feel so guilty and selfish about making us move back here when we knew there was a chance he would struggle to find work and i just wanted to make him proud of me. he told me that he does feel proud of me and what i've achieved this year and that was one of the reasons he couldn't come clean about his c/c.

anyway we're back on track now. the money saved will go to his c/c and not the car loan and we're going to save every penny of his christmas job (he's got full time work for 2 weeks starting on tuesday) to go towards offering his other card a f & f payment. i'm going to pop over to the c/c forum to see if anyone has any advice on that in a minute after i've changed my signature back.

so all in all a much better day today