Zig's 'Save for a House and Stay out of Debt' Diary!

Flower08

zigmeister wrote: »

If the weather was alright today I wanted to go for a walk, but it was torrential rain instead.

You're telling me! We have skylight windows in our bedroom and i woke up at 4am to the sound of water pouring into our room :eek:

zigmeister

Actual leaking into your bedroom?! What a nightmare! I hope the weather improves soon cuz I hate driving in the wind and rain!

Flower08

zigmeister wrote: »

Actual leaking into your bedroom?! What a nightmare! I hope the weather improves soon cuz I hate driving in the wind and rain!

Well our windows were open (gets like a sauna in our room so the windows are always open!) so the rain all just came in. OH and the cat were not impressed :rotfl:

zigmeister

I've had a really awful few days.

Placement is stressing me out because there's loads to do and not enough time, and then I was basically told I need to get up to the standard of the girl I'm on placement with because she's much more organised and confident than me.

And OH has been really down since Sunday and saying nothing was wrong and stuff. And we had a big chat yesterday and he was saying he doesn't get excited about seeing me anymore and he's fed up with being stuck in this flat and that he's confused. Obviously I was upset, but he says he wants to be with me etc, he's just feeling confused.

We went out for a meal tonight and it was really nice to be out the flat and chatting and stuff. I said do you want to see me tomorrow and he says he'll think about but I don't think he wants to.

Feel properly rejected and I don't know what to do!

I did buy some new shoes today though. I have loved them for ages but said there was no way I was gonna pay £140 for them, but I got them for £79 today

Tete_en_l'Air

Gah, why does my stupid laptop like to randomly skip back a few pages and lose my posts? Deep breath and start again...

Aw Zig, you poor soul, sounds like a heavy few days. Firstly with the placement, that can't have been a very nice feeling being compared to someone else like that. Had you felt yourself that you weren't organised/confident enough?

And as for OH, yes you must be feeling pretty rejected I can certainly understand that. Sounds like he's pretty fed up all round though, does he have work probs? Big virtual hugs, hope you feel a better after a night's sleep.

Shexy Shoes though

zigmeister

Thanks for replying Tete

Placement: She's definitely more confident than me, but she's worked with younger children before and I've only been with yr5/6 so it's a big difference. And I am fairly organised, but she's constantly two steps ahead while I'm on the current week if that makes sense. So it makes her look better.

Even though I was upset I know I would have coped alright but because OH wasn't really speaking to me and I was worrying about what was wrong, I was just all over the place.

Nope, he's got no work troubles. He just feels stuck in a rut. I'm scared he's going to decide that he'd have more fun being single. I feel like I'm being punished for both of us neglecting the fun side of our relationship.

Keep crying at the moment and it's rubbish! He keeps saying sorry but nothing is changing - he's still distant. This weekend should be fun. Really wish I didn't have placement at the moment.

Tete_en_l'Air

She sounds like right swot, trying to make you look bad, sheesh! It's difficult that there are two of you because neither of you are ever going to be seen in your own light, just compared to each other. If you feel like you're on top of your workload and not stressed by it then try not to worry too much. And if you feel like your confidence is growing well then that's good - how would she cope if she had to go and work with older kids? Try and measure yourself by your own standards.

zigmeister wrote: »

I feel like I'm being punished for both of us neglecting the fun side of our relationship.

But don't just let the relationship slip away - if you feel it and he is worth the effort then really make the effort. Try to put work stuff aside, maybe have a relaxing bath or something tomorrow when you get in to draw a line under it, then spend the weekend together enjoying yourselves and each other's company, rather than moaning about work and being humdrum. At best he'll see you making this effort and be inspired to do the same and you'll rediscover each other, and at worst, at least you'll know you tried your best.

Sorry I've ended my tirade on a bit of a negative there, but see how you feel after some proper time together over the weekend xx

zigmeister

Being on a paired placement has it's good and bad points. The inevitable comparisons aren't so good! Good advice though Tete, thanks I just need to push myself for the next 2 weeks to do the best I can then it's over.

I work Sunday so we have Saturday together. But I'm not sure whether he wants to see me yet. He's thinking about it. :rolleyes: Urgh. I have suggested going out for a walk or something though to get us out the flat, so I'm praying that the weather will be good.

I only had 2.5 hours sleep last night and I'm exhausted and feel completely drained so I'm off to bed! Thank you Tete for making me feel a bit better :A x

Cinny91

Aww, Zig!! Sorry to hear about the placement. I agree with Tete, the girl sounds like a right swot And double sorry to hear about problems between you and your OH. Looks like you got some good advice from Tete though Would put my 2 pence in but I'm running late for work, but couldn't just read and run!

Hope you're feeling better today

wendz86

Sorry to hear about the problems you have been having! Just work as hard as you can at your placement that is all you can do. I am sure there are things you can do much better than the other girl, just need to show it!

As for your OH, sometimes relationships do get a bit like that. Mine did and we sadly broke up for a while but we both decided to put a lot more effort in and got back together and since then things have been great. Not saying you should break up but like Tete said you need to try and rediscover each other.

Hope you are ok!