Is it time to ban Christmas presents? Blog and poll discussion

Churchmouse

Well I'm sorry, but I think too many of you ( including Martin ) need a proper dose of Christmas spirit I am a Christian, so am well aware of the true meaning of Christmas, but I also get enormous pleasure buying my family and friends gifts that I think they will enjoy.

Most of the problems seem to arise from this "equality" of gifts which actually is completely against the spirit of Christmas. Even those that agree with Martin take issue with his list of times for gift giving saying "why should I buy for newborns, I don't have children?" "why should I buy a wedding gift, I'm not married?" For goodness sake, if you only want to give to receive, don't bother!!!!!!! If equal spends matter to you, don't spend!! I buy the gift I think someone will like. If it costs tuppence or twenty pounds is of no relevance, it's the love behind it that matters. If you're giving a gift for any other reason than you love someone and want to bring them pleasure, then don't bother. Me, I'll be out trying to find lovely stuff that my friends and family will love, and I don't give a monkey's if I get anything back or not. Of course if they've bought me something nice ( value not an issue) then that too is lovely. One of the nicest gifts I've received was from a friend from this site that was more for my grandson than me, it was a lot of effort and I really appreciated the love that came with it.

Happy Christmas all

Patchwork_Quilt

I would also like to limit present giving, although I have very much appreciated what people have bought me. The trouble is that we're the only ones on both sides of the family with children and we've said many times that we feel guilty receiving presents for all of us, and wouldn't people be more comfortable just buying for our children. Or not at all. I would be very happy just to get together and spend time with people I don't see very often during the rest of the year. However, no-one seems happy with this, even those who don't have very much money and sometimes end up giving things that have no use at all. It's not what Christmas is about.

Grannywales

Heard Martin on Jermey Vine on friday, brilliant, I have said for years the cost of Christmas has been getting out of hand in a big way. This year has been horrendous for my wife, she lost her job in July after being made seriously ill with stress at work, which is another thing so lets move on, so she decided this christmas cash is tight lets get back to basics, she has made all the family cristmas presents from jams to pickles to quilts for the adult generation to clothes for the grand children, they all know they are getting hand made presents and are all excited, I bought her some sow on labels for all the gifts to say who made them, "Granny with love" and "Mum with Love", and they will love and appreciate them for years to come when all the high priced gifts of the past have been dumped or lost or even just never used.

Making these gifts has brought her much pleasure, has taken her mind off her poor treatment by her last employer and has given her hours and hours of pleasure.
And all gifts are made with love and not bought with future stress in mind of how much it all costs.

Lets get back to the true meaning of christmas and not what the retailers have sold us what Christmas is.

Then after Christmas the sinking feeling when all the bills come in the credit cards statements etc etc will be so much less and think of the great feeling you will have knowing that you made, you gave, and it didnt break the bank.

As my mother said years ago "its the thought that counts".

Lottebear

We ask for pratical thinga we need and would like, so there are no dreadful gifts. As childern we had famliy that only gave presents for birthdays and not christmas and vice versa. I also ask for vouchers which I spend through the year.

dannyboy419

I think Martins idea is great!

Last Christmas my family and I decided to make Christmas much cheaper.

My two sisters and I got together in the week before Christmas and made some onion chutney and some rocky road for our extended family (aunts, uncles and grandparents and friends). We wrapped them up in shiny paper and ribbon, and still get asked for the recipes now!

We still did a bit of gifting in our immediate family, to our parents and boyfriends, but had a strict limit. To be honest it was a lovely Christmas and we had great fun getting together to make the gifts. This year we'll certainly be doing the same but just change the recipes.

We're young and have all just bought our first homes, so no point getting into more debt especially when no one can remember what you got them the year before anyway! For me the meaning of Christmas is going to Curch, getting together with family and friends and enjoying time together. It doesn't mean spending a fortune at the shops

HariboJunkie

Churchmouse wrote: »

Well I'm sorry, but I think too many of you ( including Martin ) need a proper dose of Christmas spirit I am a Christian, so am well aware of the true meaning of Christmas, but I also get enormous pleasure buying my family and friends gifts that I think they will enjoy.

Most of the problems seem to arise from this "equality" of gifts which actually is completely against the spirit of Christmas. Even those that agree with Martin take issue with his list of times for gift giving saying "why should I buy for newborns, I don't have children?" "why should I buy a wedding gift, I'm not married?" For goodness sake, if you only want to give to receive, don't bother!!!!!!! If equal spends matter to you, don't spend!! I buy the gift I think someone will like. If it costs tuppence or twenty pounds is of no relevance, it's the love behind it that matters. If you're giving a gift for any other reason than you love someone and want to bring them pleasure, then don't bother. Me, I'll be out trying to find lovely stuff that my friends and family will love, and I don't give a monkey's if I get anything back or not. Of course if they've bought me something nice ( value not an issue) then that too is lovely. One of the nicest gifts I've received was from a friend from this site that was more for my grandson than me, it was a lot of effort and I really appreciated the love that came with it.

Happy Christmas all

Hear Hear. :T:T:T

To me it is a time for generosity of SPIRIT. I love to give and don't think that giving someone a gift places them in my debt to give me something back.
When a child is born I am happy for the parents and want to give a gift that will show that this birth should be a celebration. Likewise when a friend gets married. I want to mark the occasion, not mark it in a book that I ma now expecting something in return.
As long as you are happy to spend within your means then gift buying really shouldn't be a problem and to my mind it is an opportunity to show love in addition to all the other ways I do it all year round.

viktory

Absolutely not. I am quite horrified at the suggestion.

History tells us that the infant Jesus himself gave presents. This helped to establish Christmas Day as an occasion for Christians to give gifts. In those days presents were very modest and included such things as cakes, fruit, nuts, dolls and items of clothing.

Whilst I accept that there are many, many people that get into awful debt to buy gifts, 'banning' Christmas presents is not the answer. We need to teach people that it is OK to give simple, home made gifts or at the very least cut right back to one gift per person - and to cut back on the number of people we buy for. We need to teach people that not buying the latest expensive 'must have' toy or gadget does not demonstrate a lack of love; but spending time with our loved ones is the most precious gift of all.

We need to get right back to basics - for example, I am planning on making cakes this year, something I have just discovered I have a talen for, so my gifts will be simple, cheap but made with love and time - gifts that cost nothing but offer so much.

I feel under no pressure to buy expensive presents and will choose my presents for my loved ones with care. I get huge pleasure from making and buying gifts for my loved ones and will not be made to feel guilty about this.

So instead of bandying the word 'ban' around perhaps we should use the work 'teach' instead.

Rob71

Ban Xmas? That's a bit extreme - but I agree with the sentiment.

Is it really the season of goodwill? Shouldn't that be all year round? To be anything else wouldn't be very "Christian"! Incidentally, I'm not religious...

As a society we seem to have gotten into the habit of buying tat for Xmas, valentines, Mothers Day, Fathers Day, Easter and Halloween. We buy tat because the shops tell us to. Mostly because Hallmark decided we needed to be buying more cards...

It's only a matter of time before we start celebrating Thanksgiving! (oh, the irony!)

If it makes you happy to do something based on a date in the calendar, then fine - fill your boots. Equally you need to appreciate that this particular time of the year makes some people very *unhappy*.

Personally, the best xmas I've ever had was when I was stranded several thousand miles away on a tropical beach, eating a fantastic curry,with the people that matter to me...

Who (honestly) likes eating Turkey for the 1st two weeks of January...?!

DaveMP

For the last 15 years my family have had a choice at Christmas; presents or a skiing holiday. After all, it is another week off work/school so why waste it sitting at home.


What the skiing holiday ensures is the family are located in an apartment, without the familiar trappings. Usually families will have their Christmas dinner and then disperse back into the confines of bedrooms and the lounge and the isolation of TVs and PCs etc.


By going away on holiday the family spend a quality seven days in close proximity, thrown together without distractions. Yes there are small presents to satisfy the Christmas spirit, but the real present is the bonding that occurs, which refreshes the family ties.

Looking forward to Christmas in Stubai, Austria this year.

singingspam

I'm glad someone is brave enough to say what I've been thinking for years. The only winners at Christmas are the retailers. It's just one big commercial gimmick nowadays. Bah humbug!