child protection arrived at our house, angry with nursery for reporting us.

skipsmum

((((hugs))))

DS is 9 and has Juvenile Arthritis. He also has the injections into his joints, and I can undertand completely about the immunity and temperature problems.
I really think if the nursery felt the need to speak to social services they should have done it with your knowledge. All that having them turn up on the doorstep will do is create a sense of distrust between parents and nursery/SS.

OP, weve always found childrens social services to be really good, they helped us get disability benefits and through them we have access to play therapy, sensory rooms and lots of additional support and parents coffee mornings and stuff.
DS has a major buggy that we use when hes really bad but people can be very funny about it and talk to him as if hes stupid. I can understand you not wanting to do that, but your daughter will get very heavy! DS manages to have an active life, he does karate and swimming and is on the football and rugby school teams. There is life for kids with JIA.
Best wishes
Skipsmum

junior_j

Hiya , sorry i have not had a chance to read any other replies

I am sorry you had to go through this , i am sure it was very distressing for you and your poor wife , as well as going through the trauma of having a poorly child you then have your house inspected as well as false alligations made .

Just wanted to say that although nurseries have to very very very careful about things like this becuase abuse does happen and can go un detected they should of been more thoughtful and tried looking at the bigger picture , for example saying your middle child looks thinner , child go through growth spurts , shooting up and widening out doesnt mean you are not feeding her that was very thought less of them.

I wish your daughter well and hope they find a treatment that helps her and you and your wife are able to trust care givers in the future xx Have a nice evening

elfen

I know you say your lovely wife is stressed, maybe it would help having some SS support, so when things get worse they're already in place and able to help. I know little one is young, but does she have an occupational therapist (OT) who may help with some adjustments that may need to be made to the house (extra bars so she doesn't lose her balance, a better pushchair more suited to her needs) They will also help if you need DLA, and should help with the application.

Also, if there is Sure Start in your area, could you see if you're eligible to join and get a home visit? They can play with the little ones for a bit and your wife could get some time to herself to relax? I'd also suggest going to the GP and seeing if she can get some outside help, like someone for her when little one is bad, so she knows she's not on her own (and neither are you)

If you're worried about the injections, could you ask the local nurse to show you how to do them, so it causes little one less pain and you less anxiety if she's in pain? Also, my mum has a form of arthritis (and has had for a long time) and I know her hands don't flare as much as they did as she keeps them as supple as possible (she knits and crotchets) but she does wear gloves to keep them warm as she has Reynauds syndrome too (bad circulation) If little one's hands are bad, does heating them help (wearing a pair of gloves, even indoors) as the heat may help the swelling, if only for a little, and you could get her some funky gloves to wear

esmf73

OP,
I've PM'd you as I'd prefer not to talk on forum.
All the best x

BitterAndTwisted

nottslass wrote: »

Getting hold of medical records (Your own) Isn't simply a question of "just getting a copy" They need to be formally requested and you usually have to pay !!!

Also unless the nursery has medically trained staff IE a Doctor, the medical records are unlikely to be understood by the "lay person" - I cannot understand what right (or reason) the nursery thinks that it has to access this Private & Confidential Information. In this instance I would be reporting my concerns to ofstead.

Of Course Nursery's need to Inform Social Services when they have concerns about a Child's welfare - But medical Records ? No way !!!!!!!

I acknowledge and appreciate your views and do not disagree with what you are saying. I was purely trying to put a positive spin on what on the face of it appears to be a rather threatening and unhelpful situation.

From a negative can come a positive, so I hope the family concerned can and do get some extra help for their child. I know I'd need it in similar circumstances

quietheart

Hey just wanted to say your little girl is so lucky to have been born to parents like you. You must've felt like you'd been punched when they turned up on your door.
It takes me back to when my child was having problems at nursery. He was terribly withdrawn, no speech, no interaction. I felt under suspicion from early on. We saw many professionals who either thought we were in denial or over-anxious, it felt like you couldn't do right.
It is a struggle and it really shouldn't be. It's tough enough to deal with your child's issues without the nonsense that seems to go with it.
Keep your chin up and keep doing what you know is right for your little girl.
Best of luck.

stolt

Thanks for all the replies and great encouragement and advice, ( i hadnt had any notification on my email that i had anymore replies for some reason!) Such alot to read through and re-read through. But just to recap I dont see the CSA as a enemy and after the initial shock has died down then its not even part of the bigger picture to worry about. i dont know if its core assementment or intital asementment (my mind was in a blur at the time) but she said that she must read the statement out to us and they will give us a chance to respond, she did talk to all the girls and could see them playing, even keira was running around that day but didnt speak them in a separate room or even ask to. My wife saw some of the nursery teachers in the playground of our elders school but they didnt see her and she didnt want to say anything but some of the other mums wanted to because they all agree that it could have been handled in a much better way for everyone concerned. Its not a problem for me but there is still that stigma attached to having your family being checked out by child protection.

my_gorgeous_ellie-belle - its funny that you mentioned that because the consulatant said the same to my wife a few months back, and it really is last saloon to go into a wheelchair. they would much rather have sufferers keep joints active to avoid them locking up.

Strangely enough shes been great again today and yesterday and has been running around, like a different person! I think the idea of having someone round to perhaps interact with her with my wife perhaps having 30mins or so to have shower and not worry about her would be great and its something i'm going to look to do and i think my wife would enjoy that. I'll apply for badge aswell so its easier especially for the cold dark wet weather. Although they may think someone so young it wont apply to.