5 OS Pleasures in your Day Today part 2

ampersand

Caterina and beachbaby[and everyone else. bien sûr] - have just caught up on your posts and am dashing out.
Just want to send hugs, companionable cup/glass and insistence that you stay right here and ease up on your two selves until I pop back. Lovely banana loaf remainder for you to share while I'm out. Made it to take to our Charity showroom yesterday - another cracking day, around £900, done by just 2 of us.
We have such a marvellous atmosphere and good time/good team thing going on and people seem to love coming to us. Anyway, heading out now with warmest allsorts zooming your way.

Primrose

Caterina - this is a horrible thing to happen to you and I can understand how you're now kicking yourself for something which was originally embarked upon with the best of motives.
Whilst your young visitor may seem genuine, please do try and satisfy yourself that you are not being "groomed" by somebody who is engaged in a lifestyle of making fraudulent transactions, starting off on a small scale so as not to arouse suspicions.

If he is genuine (and I don't know what country he comes from so perhaps it's one where hospitality to strangers is stretched in a wider way than we are used to doing here in the UK), then you may have to explain to him that he has overstepped boundaries and this has made you you feel so uncomfortable that you have decided to withdraw from offering accommodation to anybody as you have done in the past. Perhaps you could explain that due to the recent increased warnings about terrorism, you have been made to feel uncomfortable about accepting deliveries of unknown gadgets to your home address by a foreigner you hardly know, and ask him how he thinks the police would react if they were to look at what he's done. (And how do you know that he isn't actually a terrorist? They don't exactly walk around with "Terrorist" or "Criminal" written all over their foreheads but try to blend into the population in an unobtrusive way).

I can understand why you're furious. You've been taken advantage of. Perhaps he is young and gauche and inexperienced in the ways of good manners with strangers. What I am more concerned for you about is that he might be slightly more than that so I hope you won't allow yourself to be edged into a vulnerable position.

sparrer

beachbaby will be thinking of you this evening. Perhaps have some pampering time, a long lazy bath in candle light with you favourite music playing, a supper of yummy goodies, a chat on the phone with friends or family, snuggle down with a good book...whatever you do you can do it knowing people have you in their thoughts. The first few visits are difficult, no getting away from that, but if as Frith said you have some plans for yourself it will see you over those times

Caterina

Hi

Ampersand and Primrose thank you for your kind words, I know that here I can always find my friends and make sense of what life throws at me.

I just want to reassure Primrose that this guy is (almost certainly) 100% genuine, he is just, as you rightly said, young and inexperienced - I know he still lives with mum and dad (didn't we see about a MILLION photos of his family the other time he was here? *GROAN*). He just does not have any sense of boundaries. Also, by the way he talks and acts "normally" he would appear to be one of these highly (technologically) intelligent but extremely (emotionally) ignorant "geeks". In fact I would stretch it to say that he appears to be the archetipal stereotype of the GEEK - hence a desperately boring, lonely and sad young man. That's why we feel some compassion instead of 100% raging fury.

I would be totally surprised if he was a terrorist of any sort - while I agree that terrorists do not advertise the fact, I think this is as unlikely a risk as any. But I take your point.

The gadget is a mobile cover, nothing sinister and it was ordered from a reputable company (which I chose not to mention for reasons of discretions). So no worries on that front, just the mild despair of having to fritter some of our precious weekend time to this silly ignorant boy.

I have booked cinema tickets for me and DH on Friday so we will tell him that he needs to leave early in the morning and not be back until late evening, and to sort himself out for dinner. Saturday we are planning to spend the whole day out and probably will feed him in the evening, but nothing special, I am definitely not going out of my way this time, he will just have to adapt to my family "hippy slop" LOL!

I shall update after his departure - you never know, he might be contrite enough to be really inconspicuous, and we will go to no effort to invite a return - NO WAY JOSE!

sparrer

Caterina my heart goes out to you, what a horrible position to be put in for no other reason than you're a thoughtful, generous person. You're absolutely right to be angry, that young man needs putting firmly in his place and good for you for standing up for what is right - your home, your peace, and your sanity (three hours looking at the same photograph? No wonder you were losing it!). We took English language students when the children were younger and only had problems with one - I hasten to add the Italian, Belgian and Dutch children were lovely. Fortunately they were in organised groups so there was always a group leader to discuss with.

I understand you not wanting to turn him out for one night but I'd be very tempted to find the address of a YMCA or youth hostel and suggest he stays there in future.

Give yourself something to look forward to when he leaves, a meal with your lovely family, an evening just being together...to help you feel more settled and get things back into perspective. Hope you have a better night and manage to get some sleep, he really isn't worth losing any over

Caterina

Thanks Sparrer for your support! We have already decided not to turn him out (it would make us feel worse than having to look at tedious photos!). However if he contacts us again he is going to receive a polite but firm no! Then it will be up to him to look for alternative holiday accommodation - Hotel Caterina has closed its doors for the last time!

Take care, will let you know how it goes. x

mineallmine

Oh CAterina, so sorry to hear about all that. How dreadful. You know there are plenty of hotels in London and him having done rude stuff over and over again I'd say something like I'm really sorry but the plans have changed. You dont need to explain why.
Very bad practice to quote your mobile number too. Huge hugs coming your way.
Actually Caterina, here's something to take things off your mind. I remember a while ago you being involved with Morse bags. Our local green grocers gives out awful, skinny thin plastic bags. I said to him he should try selling a few jute bags. Now the thing is I have not touched a sewing machine in err too many years to mention. So is there a way I could source material for someone (such as from freecycle) and they make them - so are there like local groups? It cuts through my heart that these awful bags are ending up in our seas, and our wildlife and want to do something. And it's a shame that I am USELESS with sewing. Any advice gratefully received.

Positives:
1. I've forgiven my cat for biting me. She never does it but I read her enthusiasm as playfulness when really she was saying naff off.
2. Big hug from the dog. I think he was more or less saying, see I am the better behaved one here!

Ooh that's it so far. Have a great afternoon.

Tealady_2

Hi everyone

Not posted for a few days as never seem to get time on the computer at home at the moment so snatching a few minutes at work.

Caterina - Sorry to hear about your troubles at the moment. I find it amazing that people can be so rude when you are being so kind to them
Beachbaby - I hope you manage to have a good evening tonight and enjoy the peace. Just to say I have a teenage DD and she can say some horrible things at times but doesn't realise the hurt it causes. Hugs to you
Frith & CCP - Glad to hear you are both starting to feel better
Sparrer - Hug for your dog and I hope you are both getting some sleep
Ladyhawk - I don't know how you manage your long days everyday. I have had 3 days of travelling and long days in the office and am absolutley wiped. I take my hat off to you

Pleasures for the last couple of days
1. Helping out at the local guides 40th Birthday party and meeting lots of new people
2. Some lovely RTC steak from Waitrose, really tender and tasty plus an absolute bargain
3. Managing to get DD some of the things she wants for Birthday / Christmas at a much cheaper price than seen anywhere else:money:
4. Started work on the new project that I have been planning and nice to work with the team I worked with earlier this year.
5. Couple of NS days as been doing lots of travelling and anyyhting I did spend can be claimed back through expenses
6. Looking forward to a girly night out tonight

hugs to all who need them

PetuliaGristle

Sorry I haven't been here, I've been laid low for a few days as I picked up a cold plus vomiting bug from somewhere

beachbaby belated welcome to the thread, will be thinking of you tonight. I agree with sparrer, get some nice smellies and treats and pamper yourself this evening
savingforoz bon voyage!
frugalpam and sparrer hope your cat and dog get well soon
Frith hope the tablets start working quickly and your ear is better soon
Caterina sorry to hear you've had a bad experience, your plan of getting him out of your home early sounds very sensible. I agree with sparrer (again ) he's not worth you losing any sleep over (I'm sure that with his thick skin he won't even notice)

Mine for the last few days:
1) thankfully have stopped feeling/being sick, though still full of cold
2) kittens quietly cuddling up, one currently on my lap
3) receiving the agreement and access to the allotment
4) watching Ask Rhod Gilbert and Dave Gorman's Genius on Sky+
5) Jo Brand talking about her new biography on breakfast TV this morning, I'll put it onto my library wish list
6) Ben Collins (The Stig) becoming a presenter on Fifth Gear

Hugs to everyone who's not feeling well

zarazara

1. College went really well, I feel there is a future and I will get a job I like and which is rewarding
2. its sunny
3. the grass is growing
4. the trees are beautiful
5. my toxic friend hasnt rung this week so i've not had the usual hour of man- hating tripe