5 OS Pleasures in your Day Today part 2

CCP

Evening all.

BoP - what a sad story. I'm glad she and you have managed to make a pretty good life for yourselves despite everything.

LFS -15!! :eek: You're very brave - it's bad enough being a slave to one cat, let alone 15 of them!

DD - post as, when and what you want to, hun - that's what we're here for. ((hugs))

sparrer - love the 'car donor' line - what a lovely way to look at it. I hope you and your new car (does he / she have a name yet?) are equally happy together.

1) NSD.

2) Saw a tiger moth (the insect, not the aircraft!) and lots of 'hairy bear' caterpillars that promise more to come.

3) Finally got round to selling my old mobile phone and got £21 for it, which isn't bad given it was nearly ten years old. Almost made it worth being patronised by the snotty young store staff, who clearly believed an old thing like me couldn't know anything about modern technology or culture (I'm early 30s, BTW! ).

4) Pootling around my garden seeing what's growing (lots of aquilegias from the seeds my DM gave me last year), what's fruiting (my blackcurrant bush - I might get enough for a whole bowlful this year, rather than the pathetic couple of (tea)spoonfuls I got last year), and what's got buds (several of my beloved dahlias ).

5) It's warm enough to have all the doors and windows open this evening, although there's no sun - it's the sort of sticky mugginess that threatens / promises a thunderstorm (please, please, please! ).

Kittikins

Hugs BoP x

Blackbeard_of_Perranporth

In the end, the abuser gets away scot free. All wiped under the carpet. Nice little boys.

My Aunt, for fifty years, does her daily chores, looks after her home, her kids. Then goes to bed very night, thinking.

I should tell him. No, words again. Guilt. Do I say so now. Night after night, while the fiddler goes after another. And another.

For me, thank goodness that the teacher found me aged 8. If not.























































What would had been. Between 7 and 11 it was wetting the bed you see. Not once, but every night. My fault. Off to see another shrink. (No wonder I do not like Social Workers). He is not right, people shunned you. You did not know why. Off to the shrink. Then In had made my mind up to go, but had to wait a few years, not too many though. And I was out of there, on my own.

Suppose I would not have minded if I was 8 or 9. At least I would had known. At 13, probably had decked them. At 2. There is not a lot you can do. Even less you can remember. As it was unpleasant. It gets blotted out.

Then you have the trigger. Something will snap. If that happened, I know not. It did not with me. It was something else. A simple another course so I could Foster, or was it the Scouts. Bang. Wet bed. Bu99er. Hang one, this guy is talking about me, yet he had the same. Crash the BoP truck, nearly!

Then there are those, who are in the family. 'Watch him' What the fork for. No, I got on! But still there, they lurch, though getting less on top. Still wailing for the downfall. Aint no happened.

But who is the real victim here? Go on, that must be me then. No, I do not think so. You see, I had problem with chopper. Could not !!!!. It made me cry. Also upset those around me. But that was cut off. They tried to make me the culprit. 4 years of ship, your fault. yeah, like. You forced me to nearly kill myself at 8, for being bu99ered at 2? Had it been able to complete the job. Then what. My Aunt next. It would had broken her, she would not had given two boys into the world. Nor looked after another girl. She would had taken her guilt, somehow.

No, I made my mind up, but because of the shrink, failed to get into the RAF when I was 16. Waited till I was 18, and got another opinion on it. And here we are today.

As for Aunt. If I had completed the job at 8, she would had been dead at 30! She lives today, here nightmares gone. Just now washed away. She is the real victim, not me. For 50 years she has woken up, with the thoughts and should I. Now she can rest at night in peace. Knowing that I am ok. I am safe.

Blackbeard_of_Perranporth

Kittikins wrote: »

Hugs BoP x

Hugs for my Aunt, she is the one who needs them. Not me. I need a forking hankie!

Blackbeard_of_Perranporth

Oh, and there was someone who did die as a result of this. Yes, well the pair may had been prats. Told to go back more than once. That opened the channel. The one that let them in. Mum and Dad were seeing others. Then a second came along, me. God knows how. But because they did not look after, one or both were let loose. For a while. See Aunt at 23 was left to look after me. Not her fault. Where was Mum. Dad, was he again womanising? I do not know.

When it was over, chopped. they were told again to get together an again and again. It happened in this time.

She came back, so did dad, then left then came back. Again. The bottle of Sherry for what had be butchered to her son. Not one, but every night, night after night. The hurt, the anguish, the pain. She could never talk about it. Her son butchered. Night after night. Not seeing. Then her son left home. I do not know if she stopped. She did in the end, early exit for her at 50 or so. Another victim, but not BoP. Mum.

Yet, the swept carpet of 22 years earlier, still protected the G.

ampersand

Take mine bop - and here's one of my lovely old vintage linen and lace ones for Auntie.
Thankyou for writing, now zap that remote, full on, full time.

Safe home to non-judgmentals and more scrabble and your dear Lady Bop.
Take care.

Blackbeard_of_Perranporth

Oh, and did I forget something. Something that is too hard to even say. Someone who picked up, then believed. Someone who saw more, and stood beside. Is she another victim of G. Well it is now 50 years later. There is another victim.

Caring and whatever. Put BoP before her. Trusts. Knows and stands forward. Yet cries so often with anguish. Ms Whack is the one who cared.

Blackbeard_of_Perranporth

And what about sister. One thing wrong with brother? Keeps going off to see different shrinks. Always a social worker. Apols to the usual educationalists. And the others. Does she know. Is she a victim? I do not know. We are close, yet there must be doubt. !!!!!!. Need to think about telling her how little brother was bu99ered. She knows about it being chopped, sorry wrong word, being circumcised. Does she need to know more?

Blackbeard_of_Perranporth

Sorry on a BoP takeover at the moment.

ampersand

'No worries bro', says & in best antipodean with rising end inflexion, as we do, y'know?