do people know when they are near the end of their life?!

Mr_Falling_Star

This is a very moving thread, there are some lovely stories on here. I went out with a woman who had a similar tale. She was never the healthiest person and onw night she woke up to see a glow in the room and a familiar voice saying "walk towards me" but she was scared and wouldn't do it. She lived through the night and is still with us, though still poorly. It made a deep impression on her and I believe her totally

Errata

But surely that was no more than a common or garden nightmare ?

cazziebo

I have a friend who works in end of life care, and she tells me it is quite usual for people - even those who have been quite non-responsive - to have one last "rally" before passing on.

My father knew he was dying. He was very ill and in terrible pain, but still outlasted predictions from medical staff. He was adamant he didn't want us around when " it " happened, but we (my brothers and sisters) insisted we wouldn't leave him, and had a "rota system" in his last days. There was an hour's gap one night and he passed away ten minutes into it. Earlier that day he'd been at his brightest and most communicative than he had for a while, despite being heavily sedated with morphine.

We are all sure that he waited until we had gone..

The_Banker_5

cazziebo wrote: »

I have a friend who works in end of life care, and she tells me it is quite usual for people - even those who have been quite non-responsive - to have one last "rally" before passing on.

My father knew he was dying. He was very ill and in terrible pain, but still outlasted predictions from medical staff. He was adamant he didn't want us around when " it " happened, but we (my brothers and sisters) insisted we wouldn't leave him, and had a "rota system" in his last days. There was an hour's gap one night and he passed away ten minutes into it. Earlier that day he'd been at his brightest and most communicative than he had for a while, despite being heavily sedated with morphine.

We are all sure that he waited until we had gone..

Yes I'm quite certain that happens a lot cazziebo.

kelloggs36

hezza86 wrote: »

My grandad (other side of family) did something similar aswell,
he waiting till my gran came back from the toilet before going. Which everyone insists he waited till she came back, literally took his hand and said im back now jock and he tok his last breath.
Funny how these things happen, makes you think about it.

This is so similar to when my granddad died (my mum's dad). My dad had been abroad working and was due to come home for Christmas on 20 December 1985. My granddad died at the exact moment my dad came through the gate at Heathrow airport and was greeted by my mum. We received the phonecall from my uncle when we got home a couple of hours later - it was very spooky as the previous day he had appeared to be making a recovery, having asked for something to eat for the first time in 2 weeks. It was like he knew my mum would be okay now that her husband was home and he had waited. I really believe he knew.

Broken_hearted

You can will yourself to die and suceed, aborigionies used to do it in their traditional rituals, some western people just sit down and give up too. Older people often shut down after the death of a loved one.

tandraig

cazziebo wrote: »

I have a friend who works in end of life care, and she tells me it is quite usual for people - even those who have been quite non-responsive - to have one last "rally" before passing on.

My father knew he was dying. He was very ill and in terrible pain, but still outlasted predictions from medical staff. He was adamant he didn't want us around when " it " happened, but we (my brothers and sisters) insisted we wouldn't leave him, and had a "rota system" in his last days. There was an hour's gap one night and he passed away ten minutes into it. Earlier that day he'd been at his brightest and most communicative than he had for a while, despite being heavily sedated with morphine.

We are all sure that he waited until we had gone..

the father in law i mentioned before (who converted me to spiritualism) had been surrounded by his sons and thier wives and his grandkids as we knew he was dying. my OH went to visit his friend across the road and for some reason I found myself alone with him. he was at home and i think MIL was getting everyone something to eat in back room. I sat with him and I dont know what made me say it but i did - they are all gone now dad - its just us - let go now.
he did - he looked into corner beamed closed his eyes and didnt take another breath. I was devastated. i really thought i had killed him! the nurse was brill - told me they (the patient) often wait until they are on their own before dying. but i couldnt accept it.
i spent hours on the phone that night to samaritans - i was devastated - i loved him and his sons and wives were so mad that he had gone when only i was there. but at the end of it - i KNOW he went peacefully and happily. his letitia was there for him in death if not in life.

amberlindsay

I'm touched by everyone's stories and am sorry for those of you that are currently going through losing a loved one ((hug)).

I too think people can will themselves to hang on for a loved one. My nanna was extremely ill last Christmas and the family were in and out of hospital all week visiting. Anyway; I got the call at about 4pm, that it was time - but the Christmas rush meant that me and my mum were stuck in traffic trying to get to the hospital - it felt the longest few hours of my life (me on a bus and my mum stuck on the motorway)!

My mum got there about half an hour before me and I ran for 10 minutes to get to the hospital in time - my nanna passed away about 2 minutes after I arrived and so I really do believe she was waiting for us both to get there.

tandraig

yes she was hun - to spare you the pain of being too late!

hezza86

Its nice to read all these wonderful stories and see how im not alone in my thinking. Ok it might be her dementia but im hoping that she goes to sleep one night and doesnt wake up. (thats sounds dreadful but i do)
Iv chatted to my mum who was there with me when the outburst happened and she agrees with my cousin that it could be a sign. (she's also a nurse)
But its nice to see others have experienced it. And believe aswell.