A Fool and Her Money- CAFCGIRL's Debt Diary

CAFCGirl

spud30 wrote:

Anyway, if you want my opinion for what it's worth, you deserve better than you seem to have right now hun :grouphug:

That was actually worth a lot........ to me anyway xx

Molanole

CAFCGirl wrote:

As for Molanoles comments, I realise how much of its true, and I dont think he does it on purpose, but the whole availability thing is because i simply dont do anything else lol. So itsa not like there are plans to drop

I know where you are coming from with this too hun. I moved 200 miles from home (from Canterbury to the West Country), changed job, left my family and friends all to be with my ex. It was only when I finally (after months of being told that I would never find anyone better) took a stand and broke up with him (I'm not suggesting you do anything like this unless it is right for you obviously) that he realised that I wouldn't sit up and beg for his attention anymore. I didn't have any friends there and was being bullied at work so I just got my fat bum down the gym and so was never around when he called. Even if I was in and eating pizza watching the entire 24 box set in one go, as far as he was concerned I was never in.

I've moved on now and haven't spoken to him in about three years but he still texts and calls at 4 in the morning asking if I want to meet him.

Anyway, I'm not suggesting that any of the above will be what you should do but wanted you to know that I understand where you are coming from. I also know Canterbury and how it is sometimes there can be very little do to when you're on your own.

((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))

CAFCGirl

im glad someone understands the whole Canterbury is made for groups and couples ethos!

I know what you're saying but since he's been so far away for so long, it was almost like if I dont take every opportunity to see him than I might not see him for the next month or so etc.

Once he's back here it'll be easier to be unavailable without feeling like I'm missing out as well, if that makes sense?

Cerenia

One thing i've liked about this site is how i've managed to save money from little things - things like R+R at tescos, can help with food a slight amount, and the womens freebies - especially if you can do a few, they all build upand help, and keep an eye out on special offers, better to spend a little more one day if it'll help reduce prices in the long run, i've spent loads of money in superdrug on 49p bargains like hairdyes, i know I can always use them, or swop them like some people do, or sell them on for a little extra.

Something that came to mind, for anyone reading this really - If anyone lives in an area where you have fetes etc quite often, nd you own some good hair straightners, why not have a stall where for a small fee you'll straighten people's hair? Have seen this at several places, always using GHDs, and people will pay a little for having thier hair straightened, especially if they're used to having it wavy or frizzy! One girl I spoke to was doing a stand like this for university fees, alongside her friend - they made £250 in a day together, charging £2.50 - £5, varying on hair thickness and length, and once paying for the stand in the hall, and electricity, it all helped!

Good luck though - you can do it!

gallygirl

CAFCGirl wrote:

Once he's back here it'll be easier to be unavailable without feeling like I'm missing out as well, if that makes sense?

CAFCGirl, it makes perfect sense (to another woman;) ).

It's hard when you put so much effort into something and it's not appreciated - and neither are you. You deserve better - he'll have to shape up or face our wrath:eek:

Hope you're feeling a bit better, hugs from me too. Come here you....

CAFCGirl

awwwwwww i love it

Thankyou so much to everyone, I do feel a lot more lifted.

I've had a good ol' cry, I've done the whole blaming myself thing, now I'm in the super angry stage lol

I'm sure I'll go through a few more yet though........

CAFCGirl

OK enough beating myself up for one evening.
got to thinking (with many heartfelt thanks to ZTD) that I need to sort out whats making me unhappy.

Part of it is that as much as Im aware of my situation I'm not active enough in sorting it out, whenever I make a saving I seem to be spending it somewhere else ( as to why, thats a journey I'm yet to take!)

So heres what I pay each month :(majority of these are half payments since flatmate pays half)
Rent £300 (half)
Sky £9 (half)
Credit Card I.F £30 (balance is £1130) thought it was less hut hey ho
BT £35 (phone and broadband)
Abbey loan £134.18
Abbey Credit Card £50 (balance is £1400)
Debs Card £9.18 (minimum payment, balance is £230 - old staff card)
Dorothy Perkins Card £19.01 (minimum payment, balance is circa £600)
Council tax £41.50

Now we currently have two outstanding utility bills
Water £78
Electricity £86

These are pretty new bills,but still will need paying at end of month!
So lets pretty much say I need £50 per month to pay the utilities,my share.

Now I've just been thru my online statement and have calculated that excluding the above, which are necessary payments (unless I'm wrong )
I have spent £202.09!

Now holy mother of god! I only got paid on the 25th!

Now it's that part that scares me!
From what I can work out £71.53 of that was in supermarkets.

£70 on food since the 25th, you'd think I eat like royalty! I'm only one small person!

So thats about £137 quid thats just gone bye-bye!

I'll be honest I tried to set myself up with an outlay to buy some items to re-sell via ebay. Hasnt taken off as much as I'd hoped, but £47 went on that, but should they all sell at £1, I'll make clear £100 profit. So far I've sold 3! Thanks to PurplePrincess

So that was my own fault partly, seemed like a really good idea at the time, and I'm still convinced they could sell well, but I need to adjust their listings a little.

BUT!
irrespective of that, that is still a large part of my disposable income to go walkabouts. If I had that much spare cash (i.e the £137!) I could have paid off over half on one complete debt already!

Good god I must be a total moron!
So that right there ladies and gents is my big fat problem.
Well actually I dont know what my big fat problem is, thats what I'm trying to work out with the help of my trusty sidekick ZTD (love you xx)

Now top tips hat I'm aware of
1. Spending diary spending diary spending diary!!!!! (its my new mantra!)
2. Spreadsheets galore. I now have one that tracks my payments off my loan, and credit cards.
I do also have a budget planner but I've obviously made some gross miscalculations about where my spending actually goes.
3. The power of budget - Now thats a big "suck at" category obviously
4. Mini challenges for self
5. Eat contents of house and home. Must admit I'm a pick 'n' eat kinda girl, boredom is my trigger on that front!
6. Make own lunches.
7. walk everywhere, do anyway, cant drive and dont need to go anywhere I cant walk to, or get a lift to lol
ermmmmmmmmmmmmmm thats where I lose myself I must admit.

Now must admit, even though I am aware of the above top tips, have not put them into practise as much as I should have...........

So thoughts and contributions..............
anyone................?

Cerenia

One way I found of saving money was to stock up on reduced to clear foods - especially bread, can help save some cash long run, also - I'm a HGE fan of instant noodles, I get 2 packs (plain ones are 8p a pack), 2 make a nice meal for me, and spend 18p on Sainsbury's own brand chicken stockcubes (10/pack), so for about 18p, I can have a pretty good meal, I fed and watered myself for a fortnight on £12 on reduced foods, offers, noodles etc, which I was pretty proud of

CAFCGirl

that is really good. The only supermarket I really live within walking distance to is a Tesco metro, and Im yet to ever see them have anything much reduced, no matter what time I go!

Altho did get a bag of carrots for 19p, the rabbit has had a few of those, as have I!

However this may sound like excuse making, but I need to try and have a well balanced and nutritional meal as opposed to living on 8p noodles, which, dont get me wrong, is fine every so often, but since being diagnosed with depression and already have a strange situation involving blood sugar levels (way I hear it, the opposite of being diabetic, bl**dy gp's never speak plain english!), I'm trying to keep my diet top notch, so I can control at least some part of myself!

spud30

Tesco value noodles are only 8p a pack, and they come with their own ickle pack of stock powder.

They come in a few different flavours, the chicken ones are my fave.

I love em