Pregnant again but how do I afford it?

the_cat

Sorry Eyespy, I wasn't meaning to pry.

Just wanted to point out that the father would need to be contributing towards the new arrival and that it would have a positive impact on your finances

eyespy

the_cat wrote: »

Sorry Eyespy, I wasn't meaning to pry.

Just wanted to point out that the father would need to be contributing towards the new arrival and that it would have a positive impact on your finances

Thats ok I know what you meant he earns a reasonable wage but has a killer loan which is taking all his money and im very weak in that ive not set up a fixed maintenance agreement with him for personal reasons really but he does help

OrkneyStar

eyespy wrote: »

Thats ok I know what you meant he earns a reasonable wage but has a killer loan which is taking all his money and im very weak in that ive not set up a fixed maintenance agreement with him for personal reasons really but he does help

If you are enough of a couple to make another baby then surely he should be supporting you and your child(ren), both financially and emotionally ?
TBH you should have a maintenance agreement (regardless of his loan) and it should be him and you supporting the children together, not you worrying and him 'helping'.
I am not meaning to sound harsh and I am sure you are a great mum, but he seems to be getting off without any worry whereas you seem very worried ? Again, not any of our business, but was the child planned ? If so then surely you talked about how you would support the child ? If child was not planned then you both would have been aware than accidents can happen ? I know it is easy to say this now, but is such a complicated relationship the best place to be bringing children up ?
Anyway, as I said, all the best to you, but from what you have said, it seems he is not exactly doing as much as he should.
I suppose your options (some already mentioned) are: 1. child support, 2. Sure Start and Health in Pregnancy Grants, 3. mortgage holiday, 4. check tax credit entitlement (remember you don't count first £100 of your Maternity Pay as income), 5. check out freecycle/e-bay/car boots etc for any other baby bits you might need.
Good luck.

Bootski

eyespy wrote: »

Thats ok I know what you meant he earns a reasonable wage but has a killer loan which is taking all his money and im very weak in that ive not set up a fixed maintenance agreement with him for personal reasons really but he does help

Killer Loan comes second to his duties as a father. I'm afraid, although you've PERSONAL reasons to not set up an agreement he has to pay.

" But he does help" - you need to get to grips and get hold of some of that reasonable income he has in order to pay for the kis wealfare! So Stop being weak and demand it - where else is financial assistance come from??????????????????? that you are desperately going to need

ailuro2

start cutting back now - cook more things from scratch at weekends then freeze for later in week, drop down a level on branded goods, make sure you get cashback when you buy new insurances and goods, use vouchers to save money where you can.

It all adds up - by saving now and putting it away for later you can supplement your maternity leave wages with your savings.

eyespy

ailuro2 wrote: »

start cutting back now - cook more things from scratch at weekends then freeze for later in week, drop down a level on branded goods, make sure you get cashback when you buy new insurances and goods, use vouchers to save money where you can.

It all adds up - by saving now and putting it away for later you can supplement your maternity leave wages with your savings.

Thanks yes will do this will have a good turn out of stuff I never use too and sell on ebay to put towards the fund

barnaby-bear

eyespy wrote: »

The father is around he is co owner of the property but we are not living together currently he is my 2year olds dad . It would take me 10 years to explain how complicated our relationship is but its friendly so at least I have that

...hence the pitter-patter of feet, if he's co-owner presumably he's on the mortgage and J&S liable for it's payment. I think it's going to be very hard for anyone to advise on the money side because of this unusual arrangement. There is mortgage interest help for women abandonned by men available and help for single parents with childcare but I'm not sure if your setup fits the single parent/not a couple definitions easily...

ooobedoo

Just thought I would offer my congratulations!

I use the salary sacrifice scheme, and please forgive me if I am speaking out of turn but if I have read right(between the lines - eek) if your son and the baby have different fathers, with regards to childcare you can ask your son's father to use his allocation of this, and if(and I apologise so much if I have this wrong) the babies father can do the same, I believe that this can be done. This makes a HUUUUUUUGGGGE difference to our life, we save £160 in tax relief a month and thats based on 2 wages.

Make sure that you don't worry to much, hey...if we all waited till we had enough money...there wouldn't be any children.

Take care xxx

Yorkshire_Bred

You may also qualify for Healthy Start vouchers if your income drops below a certain level

http://www.healthystart.nhs.uk/en/fe/get_the_vouchers.html

eyespy

ooobedoo wrote: »

Just thought I would offer my congratulations!

I use the salary sacrifice scheme, and please forgive me if I am speaking out of turn but if I have read right(between the lines - eek) if your son and the baby have different fathers, with regards to childcare you can ask your son's father to use his allocation of this, and if(and I apologise so much if I have this wrong) the babies father can do the same, I believe that this can be done. This makes a HUUUUUUUGGGGE difference to our life, we save £160 in tax relief a month and thats based on 2 wages.

Make sure that you don't worry to much, hey...if we all waited till we had enough money...there wouldn't be any children.

Take care xxx

my son and this baby have the same father. his company does not take part in the childcare voucher scheme