The 15k Paper Hat - It could be YOU!!!!!

too_much_debt

Hi Starnac, you have quite a while so can you get one of those sealed tins from the Poundshop or discount shop and start putting the odd coin away. I have one for £2 coins that I'm saving to spend on presents at Xmas so whenever I get one it goes in the pot, you could save all your 20ps or 50ps. I also do the Sealed Pot challenge which runs from December to December or whenever you want to topn it and it's so heavy now I can't even list it but it's still only 3/4 full. I got a great big sealed tin from the discount shop at the end of my road for £4.99.

TMD

starnac

hi tmd. i'm doing the sealed pot challenge. but all my money goes on paying off our debt. then when it's paid off we want to save for a deposit so we can have our own house again. it's going to sound really selfish but i don't mind struggling if i know i'll be debt free/ have a house but i don't really want to struggle for a boozy weekend away. my family comes first

tirlittan

Totally know where you're coming from starnac. I don't mind people thinking me odd cos I don't go out, cos in couple of years I'll be debt free!

clearmydebts

starnac wrote: »

afternoon all.

turbo lister is so much easier. i list stuff when i'm in work or got a spare half hour then i load them at another time depending on when i want them to finish. then there's no rush to list them.

feeling a bit down today. i got a txt from my best mate who's getting married next year about her hen night. basically it'll be a weekend away either easter weekend or the weekend after (which happens to be my birthday). i don't particularly want to miss easter with DD who wil be excited next year but then that means i'll have to be away for my birthday. then i asked her where we were going and she said she had no idea i'd have to ask the other bridesmaid (i asked her weeks ago to keep me informed but she just hasn't bothered. her and the other bridesmaid are making me feel left out) anyway she finally let me know what was going on and it's going to cost £200!:eek: that's before getting there, food, there's 2 pub crawls/ clubs. it'll probably cost £300 if not more all together. i haven't got that kind of money. i can't say no cos i'm bridesmaid and how bad would that look? i'm gutted to be honest. i've spent so much time sorting our finances out and this happens. :mad:

Hi Starnac,

Is there anyway that you can go just one night of the hen? Should you and the other bridesmaid not be organising it together anyway? That would keep you in the loop and not feeling excluded!

starnac

when she started organising it she wasn't even a bridesmaid. she just decided she wanted to organise it and tough to everyone else. can't see a way to only go for a day though. it's quite far from me. they all live up north. the bride has basically said it's my fault i'm feeling left out cos i moved away

clearmydebts

starnac wrote: »

when she started organising it she wasn't even a bridesmaid. she just decided she wanted to organise it and tough to everyone else. can't see a way to only go for a day though. it's quite far from me. they all live up north. the bride has basically said it's my fault i'm feeling left out cos i moved away

The bridesmaid sounds very forceful. Sounds like you don't have much choice but I can't say I really like the attitude of the bride. That was a mean thing to say to you. Is there anyway you could say no to the hen and buy her a spa voucher or something? Surely she will understand you don't have much spare cash if your OH had to go back up north to get work last month.,

(((hugs))) to you

starnac

all our friends seem to think we're loaded.

we live with my parents (til DH gets a job, we pay off our debts and we can afford a mortgage) so no "real" bills to pay. never mind i only work part time and get a lousy wage.

plus we rent out our house up north as we couldn't afford to sell it. the rent doesn't cover the mortgage but everyone thinks we've got loads of money cos a) no bills and b) we get an income from rent each month.

it's madness.

would be nice if we did have as much money as people think we do.

does anyone else get this? their friends think they've got loads of money?

clearmydebts

starnac wrote: »

all our friends seem to think we're loaded.

we live with my parents (til DH gets a job, we pay off our debts and we can afford a mortgage) so no "real" bills to pay. never mind i only work part time and get a lousy wage.

plus we rent out our house up north as we couldn't afford to sell it. the rent doesn't cover the mortgage but everyone thinks we've got loads of money cos a) no bills and b) we get an income from rent each month.

it's madness.

would be nice if we did have as much money as people think we do.

does anyone else get this? their friends think they've got loads of money?

HI Starnac,

No our friends don't think we are loaded, as OH was in uni for 2 years but they do expect us to do a lot of things and come back to Ireland for every occasion.

I think because of the recession (it is worse in Ireland) it has become more acceptable to say you can't afford to do things. Maybe you should be upfront with your best mate and say that money is tight and you would rather treat her to a meal/massage when you see her as you can't afford the hen.

savingholmes

I would be honest about not being able to afford the hen night but then I am not going to one of my sister's weddings abroad as we can't afford it!

I would be honest with your friends about money too - if they are true friends they will understand and if they aren't they are not worth it anyway!

I dropped the seed in to my parents yesterday that we may just buy for kids this year as unless I get a job soon money will be really tight. They seemed to take it okay. I think it is often us that are too proud to tell the truth rather than our friends that cause problems....

Oh well.... I need to apply for some jobs - I have spotted some more adverts. I am also trying to start writing... life long dream. Might as well make better use of the time while I am off....

starnac

thanks for all your advice. it was nothing i didn't know already but it makes more sense when someone else says it i think.

i know i need to be honest but like saving says i think i may be a bit too proud to want to admit it. stupid aren't i??