The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread! Part 4

anh1904

Last night I had a half bottle of wine. That is twice this week I have managed not to "finish what I had started", which is a step change in mental attitude if nothing else.
I have discussed an alcohol free month challenge with my other half, but we are both working silly hours just now, and with 2 little nes to keep the stress levels at least ceiling height, we think maybe in a few months makes more sense.

cazzasmazza

Yes I agree wholeheartedly, I must not get complacent and I will do my very best to ensure I don't.

On the "dodgy" joke front: What's brown and sticky???















A stick!

Fnar.

Caz
xxxx

DEBTMONKEY1A

Hi all....Sorry for lack of posting but have been busy looking after other 1/2......who's 'blip' (as I like to call it) was this time only 2 weeks (shortest yet!) & she was much much better after 9 days...think/hope she's got these annoying intrusive thoughts (always the same thought-not psychotic though!) licked & NEXT time will be able to handle them....her nurse says she's doing very well & the problems are psychological & not psychotic...she'll fingers crossed be back at work Mid September which she's very much looking forward to!

Now I've not been good (!) Still on 8 AF DAYS as have had alcohol due to the stress (I know I know....crap excuse & it makes the stress worse!)...still * AF days in a month is the most I've done in years & I'm not drinking more on the other days to compensate!

Dear Miss Piggy.... can I change my target for August to 19 days?? I think I set my sights a bit 'high' & still want to aim for something with the help of you good folks on here...if I can't then I'll understand!

I think for me I may consider just stopping completely as I usually drink at home late pm/evening in front of tv! I know that if i have a bottle of spirits in the house (or any booze) I can't just have ONE drink.

Think I might reserve alcohol for when I see friends in Norfolk (maybe 3 times a year!) or a glass of wine at Xmas! I don't have any physical withdrawals (shakes, etc) when I stop dead...just the usual not too good sleep for a few nights. My craving (or 'bells'!!!) stops at my usual drink time after just 2 or 3 days.

I think for me its just a habit & I'm not chemivally/phsyically addicted to alcohol....more of a psychological addiction to this 'habit'......

Anyway-good luck to all & welcome to any newbies! Also I've not done more than 7 days in a row AF so again that's a personal aim!

Miss_Piggy_2

Hi Debtmonkey

No problem, have changed the target for you. 19 is still a fantastic figure to aim for.

Miss P
xxx

DEBTMONKEY1A

Thanks Miss Piggy!

On a different note I think someone posted asking about the withdrawel symptoms (For want of a better word!) of alcohol?? Well for me My sleep patterns are a bit crap for a few days but by day 5/6 they're fine (I do read the PAul Mckenna book 'I can make you sleep-it's very very good)...yes I do have the occaisional 'sweaty' night (but that could be down to room being too hot!) & strangly I notice my vision is clearer (??!!)...anyone else get this? Also my blood pressure rises slightly for the 1st day or 2 then after a week it's bang on normal (BP is increased by regular drinking) when before it's been over 160!!!

yellowmonkey

Morning all.

Had a crappy sleep last night. Went up at midnight and have been up since 04:30

Funny enough had a rubbish sleep the night before and that was after I took some herbal sleep tablets My eyes were like Marty Feldmans over the duvet and my head was turning like an Owl :rolleyes: Feeling tired and have work later so will have to come alive somehow.

Good luck with the presentation Fay. Dont beat yourself up about the TV. You have to have something to watch " Take the high road " on :D

Lovely down Souf today and will be AF again today :cool:

Hope you all have a great day all

Miss P you do whatever is best for you regarding next month

Take care all and Hi Lurky :hello:

ym

graemecarter

DEBTMONKEY1A wrote: »

Now I've not been good (!) Still on 8 AF DAYS as have had alcohol due to the stress (I know I know....crap excuse & it makes the stress worse!)...still * AF days in a month is the most I've done in years & I'm not drinking more on the other days to compensate!

Dear Miss Piggy.... can I change my target for August to 19 days?? I think I set my sights a bit 'high' & still want to aim for something with the help of you good folks on here...if I can't then I'll understand!

I think for me I may consider just stopping completely as I usually drink at home late pm/evening in front of tv! I know that if i have a bottle of spirits in the house (or any booze) I can't just have ONE drink.

Think I might reserve alcohol for when I see friends in Norfolk (maybe 3 times a year!) or a glass of wine at Xmas! I don't have any physical withdrawals (shakes, etc) when I stop dead...just the usual not too good sleep for a few nights. My craving (or 'bells'!!!) stops at my usual drink time after just 2 or 3 days.

I think for me its just a habit & I'm not chemivally/phsyically addicted to alcohol....more of a psychological addiction to this 'habit'......

Anyway-good luck to all & welcome to any newbies! Also I've not done more than 7 days in a row AF so again that's a personal aim!

Well done DEBTMONKEY1A.
One thing you need to watch out for is changing targets. People without drinking issues stick to their goals about drinking, and change their behaviours. Drinkers change their goals so they can still drink and carry on with their drinking behaviour.

As you rightly say, drinking makes stress worse.
So it's important not to drink when stressed. You need to ask yourself why you have been drinking when stressed?

You may not be physically addicted to alcohol (though sleepless nights are an indicator), but you can be mentally addicted. A habit concerning a chemical (like alcohol, heroin, or nictoine) that you cannot break easily is an addiction.

I have toast with marmite every morning - that is a habit. I don't think I am addicted as if I run out of marmite, I have cereal instead, and don't go to the shop just to get marmite. I don't crave marmite, and it doesn't change the way I am feeling.

Addiction is different thing altogether. It is possible to be alcoholic and not addicted to alcohol.

Take care, you are doing great, though get back to being AF. You cannot live on past glories. Just because you were AF a few days ago counts for little today.

graemecarter

cazzasmazza wrote: »

Hi all,

Another AFD yesterday, that's 10 on the trot! This is starting to become a real habit, ha haaaaa!

Have another AA meeting tonight, which I am umming and aahhing about attending. We have some friends over for dinner tomorrow evening, so I have a load of cleaning and prepping to do tonight......... I will see how the time goes.

Still determined not to drink regardless of whether I go to the meeting or not.

Congrats to Glasgowgirl, PIR and maman for staying AF - that's fantastic!

Snowy - I sooo understand your secret stashing of the booze and your secret nipping away to gulp some spirits in between drinking cans. Lots of us on here have done that and more, me included. I used to think it was unreasonable of my OH to frown on my drinking, because that was "making" me drink in secret - now that's denial!

I realise now that my drinking had spiralled way out of control and it was just me behaving abnormally and it was the booze influencing my actions -it has never had anything to do with my (wonderful) OH. It has taken me years to realise this, I would add......

Wobbledoos - we all get differing symptoms of being AF. Some get little or none, some get quite bad effects. All I would say is, rather than researching and anticipating symptoms, just stop and listen to what your body is telling you. If you feel tired and irritable, get some more sleep, do some light exercise, ensure you eat healthy foods, do some breathing exercises to relax, talk to your OH that you are feeling very low/moody. That's what I did. I still felt quite awful from my symptoms but I made it clear every day how I was feeling, so when I did snap at my OH, it made the situation that bit easier.

She now asks me a couple of times a day how I'm feeling (emotionally and physically) on a scale of 1 - 10 (10 being brilliant and 1 being horrendous). It really helps actually.

Anyway, gotta get on with work! Sorry for rambling on, I do tend to do that.

Hugs,
Caz
xxxx

You couldn't stay AF without the meetings. Then you start the meetings and remain AF. That tells me meetings keep you AF.
By not going to meetings, it is unlikely you will be AF for long.

You may think a clean house is more important than being sober. Perhaps it is for some people, but you should try and hold onto this AF period.
You sound great and excited and full of beans. To risk losing it to tidy the house is not something I would do personally.

maman

Morning all.

Snowy, I did laugh about your stash in the shed. But we've all been there. My trick was to have a quick sherry or G&T in between so that OH thought I was sticking to just the one bottle.

Debtmonkey, good to hear your OH is doing well. You sound like a real rock of a partner. Having done loads of thinking since coming on here I'm confident my drinking is a habit too.

Without wanting to provoke anyone, that's not just because I don't sit on park benches with a bottle in a paper bag. I have a full drinks cupboard and even bottles of my favourite red so it's all down to how much I miss my habitual drink of an evening and whether I can talk myself into/out of having one. If alcohol, in large quantities, wasn't harmful then I'd drink every day because I enjoy it. Sorry, didn't mean to ramble and rant.:o

Hi Lurky, what's the news? Great to see you back.

Cazza, you're doing fab. You can always go to the Thursday group next week if too busy tonight. Depends how much you 'need' it.

Miss P, sorry you're having a few problems I find arguing with myself makes me really down but then Idon't need to do it every day so it's not so wearing.

I have to go, lots to do, catch up with you all later. (Please don't do daytime TV fay)

graemecarter

Miss_Piggy wrote: »

Morning everyone


5 minutes after posting on here last night that I was trying to ignore the bells clanging, I picked up my car keys and drove to the shop. OH was putting Piglet to bed and I told myself I was going to buy him some squash. Of course, a bottle of wine ended up in my basket.:o

However, I poured myself a glass and didn't drink it until we sat down to eat dinner. And I only drank half the glass!! Never been heard of! Other half a glass got poured away and the bottle put back in the fridge.:T

I've decided to leave it there and see what happens. Sort of testing myself I suppose. If I drink it all in one go, I have a problem. If it lasts a few nights then I'm ok. I know I know, its ridiculous logic. But I am SO tired of arguing with myself all the time! Why does life have to be so damned difficult all the time!?! I'm removing myself from the challenge this month so that figure isn't constantly taunting me too!

xx

It sounds like it is a constant struggle for you to be AF. Having the debating society in your head all the time is so tiring. I had it for years. It is like an obsession, even if I was not drinking.

Just stopping drinking isn't enough. Life is the problem, and we drink to escape life for a while. Put down drink and life's problems are still there.

The fact you have these tests for yourself suggest there is a problem with alcohol. This can be addressed by you. Good luck