Taking the plunge - first baby

Wondering80_2

Very few of our friend have babies, those that do live a long way away.. of course most of them will have kids in the next 5 years, being a similar age to us. So you are right bryanb, our social life will change anyway. Family live a couple of hours away - but not too far to visit and help I guess.

Pee

It's best to be realistic about the babysitting options. My mum, apart from having issues with my boyfriend, is just not well enough to look after a small child and it would make her very nervous and she would forcefeed the child chocolate... have very different ideas about nutrition to me. That said, i have a lot to learn from her about disciplining children and making them behave.

A couple of hours away doesn't really make a night out an option.

That said, you will meet more new mums through the pregnancy, hospital, play groups etc.

Wondering80_2

I suppose part of what is bothering me is what our friends and family will say - they are the type of people to think we should be in a three bed house with a garden before thinking about kids. It feels like a long time since I had make any kind of decision, been in the same job for five years and the same flat for three. It's good point about the subsequent kids, we do want more than one so waiting years and years to start trying would be silly.

Do people find they can sleep with baby in the same room? some of friends say this is impossible so they moved baby out.

galvanizersbaby

Wondering80 wrote: »

I suppose part of what is bothering me is what our friends and family will say - they are the type of people to think we should be in a three bed house with a garden before thinking about kids. It feels like a long time since I had make any kind of decision, been in the same job for five years and the same flat for three. It's good point about the subsequent kids, we do want more than one so waiting years and years to start trying would be silly.

Do people find they can sleep with baby in the same room? some of friends say this is impossible so they moved baby out.

Hi there

I think the current advice/guidelines is to keep baby in your room until 6 months old? (sure someone will correct me if that's not the case)
I certainly think most people will start off that way but how long it continues probably depends on baby and parent.
My DS slept fine but was really noisey (still is actually) so we had to move him in to his own room quicker than we thought while DD was fine.

I think if you haven't got a choice but to sleep in the same room you just get on with it - I do know a couple who had their first in a one bed flat and they seemed to manage ok

BTW - I wouldn't base your decision around what you think friends and family will think/say - but that's just me

kindofagilr

I say go for it, my friend fell pregnant and was living at home with her mam, he and her bf split up and my friend ended up sharing a room with her daughter for 7 years (not ideal I know) but it worked out ok for them.

lolababy

Its best to go for it nobody knows what the future holds. Your in a good position financially and your relationship is solid. The prospect of parenthood is scary but most people find it the best thing they have ever done.

MrsTinks

We have an 8 week old and live in a 3 bed terraced house and are looking for a 4 bed detached... why? Because there isn't enough room! :eek: I kid you not!
Ok we have a dog and 2 cats too but still... As others have said it's not the baby that takes up the room - it's the gear! Where will you put the pram/travel system (assuming you have a car and need a car seat too...), the changing table if you don't want it as one of the ones on top the of cot (something that for some reason I can't get my head round but that's just me!)
Then you have their play mats, the swing (btw I wouldn't be without one - I value my sanity!), somewhere to store toys and clothes (and believe me they end up with more than you!) and on and on it goes...

Personally I would look to improve your living situation first - yes it can be done, I however wouldn't want to! (My mum and stepdad did it - so I know it's doable - it's also how I know I certainly wouldn't want to!)

weezl74

Wondering80 wrote: »

Do people find they can sleep with baby in the same room? some of friends say this is impossible so they moved baby out.

We still share with our son and he's nearly 4 and a half months old. Having done it thus far I think we'll go the distance...

Wondering80_2

MrsTine wrote: »

We have an 8 week old and live in a 3 bed terraced house and are looking for a 4 bed detached... why? Because there isn't enough room! :eek: I kid you not! QUOTE]

Wow! really? We had a tiny 3 bed terrace for my mum, sister and I, my sister's room was a box and it was fine. But I guess everyone has different needs and it depends what they are used to. OH and his brother shared the second room of small 2 bed flat until he was 8. Thanks for your comment though Mrs Tine, but I think if we wait until we can buy a 4 bed round here then my eggs will gone off:eek:

MrsTinks

LOL I'm not saying you'll need a 4 bed - just that we do At the moment the baby has the box room, we have the master bedroom and the 2nd large bedroom is a guestroom which is being converted to guestroom/office. We can't do without a guestroom as our families both live abroad or over 5+ hours away - this means when they come to visit they come for a week... Guestroom is essential for our sanity
However the box room is fine as a nursery for now, but as soon as she's old enough to walk it would be too small - there is JUST room for her cot bed...
New build houses are notorious for being tiny though
Downstairs is a living/dining room that isn't generous in size and the kitchen is tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiny...
Thinking about it... I think my mums flat when I was a kid was actually physically bigger than this house and that was a 1 bed! But floorspacewise it was probably bigger (or just seemed it because I was a lot smaller )
I guess if your flat is big then it might be less of a problem