The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

bigzippy

time2deal wrote: »

Granted - that means its been a good operation free month, but at the same time - I do like the complete escapism! Since I don't have to be 'good' I'm indulging instead in Red Wine therapy tonight.

Good to see you think you have ov'd this month. Did you BD at the right times? When is the next FS step for you - assuming you go with the Clomid next month.

I like the idea of escapism, but I was not well when I came round from GA. My blood pressure plummeted and it wasn't fun.

Fs is at very end of May, regardless of whether I take the last cycle of clomid or not. I need to lose the least 7 pesky lbs before then and they'll refer me on for the ACU. It's my birthday at the end of April though, so I'm gonna aim to lose them by then (and maybe a little more during May), to give myself some leeway and feel justified in getting some extra birthday treats I saw one of my nieces yesterday and she asked me how much weight I've lost because I was looking very slim and skinny - bless her, she's only 9

Yep, covered the bases with Bd, at least every 2 days if not daily. Took the anti spasmodic up til today too. I still felt things in spasm yesterday though, so I'm not holding my breath about these damn tubes :cool:

One of my close friends has a newborn and is struggling with what I think is PND - she's asked (me & others) for help (which is good) after I'd offered, but is also very conscious of our situation and doesn't want to make things worse for us, bless her :A I'm sure I'll have pangs, but I think there are some people you don't have that same horrid/jealous/whatever reaction too, and thankfully she'd one of those people plus I've found being around baby stuff in general (anyone else internally wince when going through the kids department in places like Ikea?) much easier since we decided to pursue fostering... I just hope I'm of adequate help and she recovers well/quickly

Of course I've now convinced myself that everything's against having babies naturally... We already know I have pcos and endometriosis, then there's the "are the tubes in spasm" thing, the "is my immune system too good" NKC fear, the fear that clomid and all other fertility drugs will do nothing but make my endo worse -requiring another surgery, producing more scar tissue -which could then become another problem in and of itself. And I still have meant reservations about ivf, which we won't be able to put to rest until we actually get to see the ACU... I need to be able to turn all this off, but a) I can't forget about it AND stay focused on why I need to lose the weight & by when, b) my mum was asking about it this weekend, c) my brain turns more and more to etc the closer I get to the FS appointment. :cool::o

I think all this ^^ is why I've been quieter of late, nothing personal ladies

firefly369

jujugaboo wrote: »

I had my NKC test done in The Lister Hospital in London and cost me £550, worth every penny when they realised I had high killer cells. They tested it againt the 3 methods that they use to reduce it we went for the less evasive one, steroids, 2nd time using them it worked but also it was a frozen one and we used assisted hatching. We were treated for this at our local clinic.

That is very reassuring that the treatment worked for you. Did you have to take the steroids for your whole cycle? I have read that prednisolone is the steroid of choice but one of the side effects listed for that drug is no or irregular cycles and I only just got mine within normal ranges.

BZ - Sorry, I didn't mean to give you more things to worry about. If you have already had lots of blood tests then the chances are that it would have been flagged by now.

bigzippy

firefly369 wrote: »

That is very reassuring that the treatment worked for you. Did you have to take the steroids for your whole cycle? I have read that prednisolone is the steroid of choice but one of the side effects listed for that drug is no or irregular cycles and I only just got mine within normal ranges.

BZ - Sorry, I didn't mean to give you more things to worry about. If you have already had lots of blood tests then the chances are that it would have been flagged by now.

Steroids stopped my cycles when I was on them a few years ago

You aren't giving me something to worry about, my stupid body is I have a raised count for things anyway because of my conditions... :cool:

time2deal

bigzippy wrote: »

One of my close friends has a newborn and is struggling with what I think is PND - she's asked (me & others) for help (which is good) after I'd offered, but is also very conscious of our situation and doesn't want to make things worse for us, bless her :A I'm sure I'll have pangs, but I think there are some people you don't have that same horrid/jealous/whatever reaction too, and thankfully she'd one of those people plus I've found being around baby stuff in general (anyone else internally wince when going through the kids department in places like Ikea?) much easier since we decided to pursue fostering... I just hope I'm of adequate help and she recovers well/quickly

Of course I've now convinced myself that everything's against having babies naturally... We already know I have pcos and endometriosis, then there's the "are the tubes in spasm" thing, the "is my immune system too good" NKC fear, the fear that clomid and all other fertility drugs will do nothing but make my endo worse -requiring another surgery, producing more scar tissue -which could then become another problem in and of itself. And I still have many reservations about ivf, which we won't be able to put to rest until we actually get to see the ACU... I need to be able to turn all this off, but a) I can't forget about it AND stay focused on why I need to lose the weight & by when, b) my mum was asking about it this weekend, c) my brain turns more and more to etc the closer I get to the FS appointment. :cool::o

I think all this ^^ is why I've been quieter of late, nothing personal ladies

So you are now less stressed - so I'm sure you will be one of those people who say 'As soon as I stopped thinking about it, it happened!'

jujugaboo

firefly369 wrote: »

That is very reassuring that the treatment worked for you. Did you have to take the steroids for your whole cycle? I have read that prednisolone is the steroid of choice but one of the side effects listed for that drug is no or irregular cycles and I only just got mine within normal ranges.

I took the prednisolone for 2 weeks prior to embie transfer and then up 17 weeks of pregnancy. As it was used for ICSI irregular cycles doesn't really matter mine were always long anyway. The worst side effect I had was the constant hunger.

Whattodonow

Sorry all, this is the first day in ages I have had to properly catch up on the thread (other than my ranting over clomid couple of days ago)

tea_lover wrote: »

Well scan went ok, so ICSI starts (again) this evening. Bring on the menopur!...
OH has to provide another sample, as apparently they were worried about contamination with the last one and need to check if he needs antibiotics. Bit weird as his last sample was about 6 months ago and we've had a lot of appts since then so I've no idea why they've only just mentioned this.

Good luck Tea! Sounds a bit dodgy over your OH's sample, do you think they misplaced it or something?

time2deal wrote: »

Evening ladies,

Just dropping in to say that I have been officially given the all clear today! All cancer was removed with clear margins....Onwards and upwards!

Yay! Time2Deal, brilliant news

Whattodonow

VK-2008 wrote: »

Longest 2 weeks of my life ahead!!!!!!
Arrrrgggghhhhhhh exciting

Good Luck VK!

tea_lover wrote: »

Today's classic comment from the woman who thinks IVF is only needed because people drink too much...

"People shouldn't be allowed to be a midwife if they haven't had children. What can they possibly know about it?"

Tea, this woman seems obsessed with babies, and people who can't have them. Seriously, !!!!!! is her problem!!?

time2deal wrote: »

Which leads me to a dilemma. For me, the big problem with that is that at some stage one of you will move on... and does that just make it more painful in the end...

I would love it if I could talk about this with another woman in 'real life'. Someone in work has just got pregnant and someone mentioned to me that she had been trying for a while. I don't know if I should mention my issues with her, because I don't want her to feel guilty (and what if the trying for a while isn't true, or was just for a few months)... aaaaanyway, my point is, I would perhaps mention something in the hopes that she opens up? It's very lonely TTC!

Whattodonow

codemonkey wrote: »

Just popping out of lurkdom for some advice from you lovely ladies.?

Hi Codemonkey. Welcome and I hope you don't stay long. I'm sure the other lovely ladies have given you advice by now. Good luck

squ1rrel5 wrote: »

Hi ladies, I've decided to make the move and come and join you over on this thread - it's been almost two years now and I'm just a bit fed up!

Ditto the above Squirrel. I'm sure we all feel jealous sometimes, its only natural. I have found it gets easier with time though (I haven't cried over anyone's pregnancy announcement/newborn for a good few months now!)

TeamLowe

Quick questions for the private ladies

1) how did you choose your clinic? They all seem to be very good, I think. There's nothing too special about us, just my lack of ovulation so I think that's all we'd need treatment for (I hope)

...which leads to my second question...

2) I've looked at the hewitt centre price list (it was on that documentary and I liked the head clinician lol) and it says ovulation induction is £385 including initial consultation and scans fir first cycle which seems a pretty good price. But it also says 'pre treatment screening' is £440 and is blood tests and sperm count.
Can I say I don't want those tests as it's only ov induction we want and we already know that my tubes, his sperm etc are fine? X x

time2deal

TeamLowe wrote: »

Quick questions for the private ladies

1) how did you choose your clinic? They all seem to be very good, I think. There's nothing too special about us, just my lack of ovulation so I think that's all we'd need treatment for (I hope)

I first went with Londons Women clinic - only because they advertised and they listed their prices openly and clearly. Although I only found out later that the drugs are never included and are a lot of money.

I also liked their 3 for 2 option, as it would put me under less stress as 'the only chance'. However, I wasn't overimpressed with them. They seemed very keen to move us quickly to ICSI, and immediately trying to 'upsell' the 3 for 2 option. Maybe I'm being silly, and we did need it, but they didn't come across as super friendly.

We then moved to the Lister, as my first consultant for the cancer was based there, and he could get us immediate treatment (no waiting around when you have cancer! It skipped all the queues). Plus he knew the team, and it was overall easier to have all my treatment with people who knew the whole story, and who I trusted.

I really liked the Lister. I don't think they were much more really than LWC, but seemed more flexible and friendly, and I think they have good results. I never considered stats or pregnancy rates, which may be silly but for me is was more important to be calm and happy with people I was dealing with - less stress has to be helpful.

I have v low AMH, and they said I should expect to get 3-4 eggs, and we got 11, so I was pleased! Although I really believe that the acupuncture for 3 months before, plus a comprehensive regime of vitamins and some traditional chinese medicine really helped.

TeamLowe wrote: »

...which leads to my second question...

2) I've looked at the hewitt centre price list (it was on that documentary and I liked the head clinician lol) and it says ovulation induction is £385 including initial consultation and scans fir first cycle which seems a pretty good price. But it also says 'pre treatment screening' is £440 and is blood tests and sperm count.
Can I say I don't want those tests as it's only ov induction we want and we already know that my tubes, his sperm etc are fine? X x

It depends what the pre-screening is. In my experience an initial consult is about £300, plus £100 for a SA. Adding the blood tests (which I had done with the GP) £440 sounds about right. I think you can't avoid the £300 or so initial consult, but I would expect you can elect to do the tests on the NHS and just get the results.