The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

Primmer

BZ - sending huge hugs to you. You have not failed - it is just taking you longer that is all - you will get there, keep the faith. I know it is a lot harder at Christmas and I know it is hard for you and dh this year as your MIL is not there with you but try to stay strong. We are all here for you.

TeamLowe

lots of love bigZ, it's an understandable feeling but not a true one

I have all my fingers and toes crossed for you x x

Whattodonow

bigzippy wrote: »

Deffo. Cd2 and cramps from hell I feel like such a fail and like I'm just giving DH more things to be sad about at Christmas

You're not a fail! Better luck next time chuck xxx

TTC40

BZ - echo the others. You're not a fail. I hope your/ our time will come soon. AF awaited here in next day or so.

time2deal

Hugs BZ, you know what you are saying isn't true, but I do understand the feeling.

I haven't read back, but just a quick update from me. I'm currently waiting to board the plane home, and really really sad to be leaving. Normally I'm happy to get home after holidays, but been lots of tears today saying goodbye to all my family. Not sure how next year is going to go, and this holiday has been like a little bit of magic - the UK feels like it has all the bad stuff now.

I may be better when I get back to my lovely home, but lets see how it goes.

I think DH has also suddenly realised that me getting sick means he may not have kids either. He isn't that into them, but hanging out for days with our neices and nephews he has been fantastic, and I think starting to realise what this disease may mean for us both. Very hard to see - but we have a lot of battles ahead of us, and if nothing else, we can always come back here and be a big part of the wider families lives. I have a feeling we will emigrate back to Australia sooner rather than later after this break - funny how priorities have all suddenly shifted, and career, money etc seems so irrelevant. But - maybe I will be different once we are past this first big stage.

Sorry, that got a bit depressing! It's been the most amazing holiday, and I'm so pleased we came. It's just very scary now coming home.

lilymay1

T2D - I'm so pleased you had a lovely Christmas. I must admit, I quite fancy your idea of emigrating to Australia!
I also love your PMA about options in the future should things not go quite as planned. My husbands auntie and uncle (65ish now) could never have children and they have always doted on any babies who came into the family. They are very religious and came to accept that God wanted them to love lots of children, not just 1 or 2. Quite a nice way of seeing it I think

Just so you know, the UK is very miserable at the moment - atleast where I am! Bl00dy rain and cold winterness! Boohiss.

Hope everyone else is doing okay. Zip - how are you today?

AFM, 0dpo but not really bothered. We've tried this cycle, as always, but I'm not expecting very much. I think I need to get out of the mindset of clomid being a miracle drug though. Nothing like setting yourself up for a fall eh?
Don't laugh, but I'm going to try and buy a seringe later. I don't know why, I just have it in my head that my cervix is never open enough and that the sperm can't get through. :rotfl: TTC madness setting in.

TTC40

T2D - glad it's been good. Next stage of your journey starts now.

14 DPO here & BFN this morning.

Primmer

T2D - glad you had a lovely time. We have family in Australia, including young niece I have never seen and so would love to go there.

TTC40 - sending hugs to you

Lily - good luck with syringe!

Whattodonow

Lily - let us know how you get on. I'm paranoid my wonky cervix is to blame!

BZ - hope you're feeling better.

T2d - what a nice break you've had. Good to know you've got that option of a supportive network back in oz.

Hugs ttc40

AFM - karma got me. Two days early and spotting. That'll teach me

Carly84

Hi all,

I have been off the pill for 3 years in April. I have a DD from a previous marriage & my husband has no children.

We conceived April 2011 but miscarried early.

I visited the doctors last year after 18 months ttc. They sent me for blood tests. A couple of things came back abnormal, something to do with a sex hormone in my brain but they said it wasn't abnormal enough to worry about & wasn't explained any further to me.

My husband is in the army & so is under the military doctors, whereas I am under my local doctor as I do not live in married quarters.
His doctor also sent him for tests & he has abnormal sperm count but not abnormal enough to worry about.

When I went back to discuss results, they just told me that we need to just keep trying as the 2 local hospitals (Nottingham & Derby) won't see us; one because I already have a child (eventhough my husband doesn't) & the other because we're apparently not classed as trying enough as hubby is in the army.

I went back last week after another 15 months of trying - granted hubby has been to Afghan for 6 months but he has also been on leave a lot & the doctor I saw could not have cared less, or so it seemed.

She is a new female doctor so thought I'd try her. Everything I said, she contradicted. My periods aren't regular for me. Since I miscarried, they changed & my cycle is between 22-28 days, usually 25 though but some months randomly early or late. Some months I get horrendous cramps up to 2 weeks before AF. Last month they felt like it did when I miscarried. Mostly I don't get any cramps until the day I start AF though.
Then the past few months, my breats have been so so sore 2 weeks before AF that they hurt to even walk upstairs.

I explained all this to the doctor but she just kept telling me it's all normal, even though it isn't really normal for me.

She continued to tell me I'm young so I've got plenty of time (I'm 29 next month) but I just found this quite insulting.

She said that as she's new, she wasn't 100% sure of the procedures in this area but assured me that she would ring me to let me know. I know it's xmas etc but it will be 2 weeks on Mon since I went & she hasn't rang me yet. I might be being impatient but I have a feeling now she won't bother ringing at all, especially after her complete lack of sympathy.

I did a bit of research when I came home as I have a friend who lives in Northampton in a similar situation to us (hubby in forces etc) yet after just a year of trying, they were offered IUI or IVF (not sure which) & second attempt, they conceived so it seems to be a bit of a postcode lottery I think.

Here is the link to the website I found;

http://www.infertilitynetworkuk.com/?id=5394

Interesting read & not sure if anyone else has managed to use this info to get any response before but I can't seem to find out what criteria my PCT uses to decide if I can receive funding for fertility treatment & the map on the website isn't working.
Does anyone know where I can find this info or already has the info for this area please?

Reading some of your stories makes mine feel rather insignificant :embarasse

x