The Trials and Tribulations of Trying to Conceive when its just not happening (12m+)

jujugaboo

Bluemeanie wrote: »

Thanks jugaboo. I don't like the sound of egg sharing. I suppose it just depends on how much we save up. Think can have 3 goes if I egg share, but only 1 if we don't. But then it seems a bit unethical of me not like the idea but effectively sell them for money?

We do what we have to do get a baby.

bigzippy

So sorry to hear your news Runner

Hope you can find a solution that works for you both and your finances, blue meanie :cool:

:wave: to all!
I'm not posting much, but I read back on my phone every couple of days, and then forget what I was gonna reply to


AFM:
We're still in grief-striken, heads up our a$$es, NTNP, land. Dh seems to be pushing me away to try and grieve privately, which I can respect (to a point) and I do too sometimes, but I miss him We saw our gp today, who we also shared with MIL, and he offered condolences. It made it seem far more real, for me, our doctor talking about her being dead, and I broke down completely :o Dh has a referral for bereavement counselling though, which is good - but I don't know how long it'll be til it comes through (nhs) - and 2 more weeks signed off work.

I've still no idea what's happening with my cycle, cos I stopped spotting for something like a week, then got both ewcm and then (later the same day) red/pink cm (on sunday) and no spotting since :think::huh: I did an IC hpt on friday (bfn) cos I knew I'd be drinking on the saturday. I'll wait a week or two and do another if no af by then. I really need to get back on with losing weight again, both in preparation for FS in August and to just feel better about myself again, but finding it hard to get going with it once more...:cool:

onestep

Runner... I'm so very sorry sweetie. Gentle ((hugs)).

Bluemeanie - sorry to hear your news too. Hope some of the options the girls have suggested will work for you. Write a letter of complaint to the practise manager?

AFM.. Cd 14 here. Think I'm ovulating today, & of course DH is away. £&@/?!! I'm trying not to think about it all if I'm honest; think I'm coming to accept it might not happen.

QQuaver

Runner, my DH has sperm problem too, after some hernia op when he was young. I was told there's not much the doctor can do about that. DH is taking some Chinese medicine but things haven't changed. I had early mc as well:(

Blue, I'd have egg shared if I was young enough:money:

Bigzippy, (((hugs))).

Onestep, (((hugs))) for your DH being away on ov:(

Bluemeanie_2

jujugaboo wrote: »

We do what we have to do get a baby.

True! It's not the actual egg sharing that I don't like. I'd love to help another woman. It's because the child is entitled to information that is possibly identifying. I don't want them turning up on my doorstep looking for a relationship. That may sound cold, but if I'd carried the baby etc I could understand it. But the egg is miniscule and will have all the Mother's blood etc to grow it, so seems barely mine!

Anyway don't want to digress the thread into a debate about medical ethics.

I am interested if anyone has any experiences of using a live sperm donor using AI? Because I could go this route involving no clinics etc. This is appealing in the one hand, but reason i feel a bit funny is because Hubby already has two bio kids...

Hmmmm save for IVF/ICIS or sperm donor. Eeeeek!

Hubby no help, bless him. "Whatever you want babe!"

QQuaver

Bluemeanie wrote: »

I am interested if anyone has any experiences of using a live sperm donor using AI? Because I could go this route involving no clinics etc. This is appealing in the one hand, but reason i feel a bit funny is because Hubby already has two bio kids...

2ba3c over in the TTC forum has done it a few times, perhaps you could PM her? She's not pg yet though.

fluffnutter

Bluemeanie wrote: »

True! It's not the actual egg sharing that I don't like. I'd love to help another woman. It's because the child is entitled to information that is possibly identifying. I don't want them turning up on my doorstep looking for a relationship. That may sound cold, but if I'd carried the baby etc I could understand it. But the egg is miniscule and will have all the Mother's blood etc to grow it, so seems barely mine!

It's one of the reasons why we went to Spain (for egg donation). The law's different and my baby will have no right to contact its genetic mother.

It's not a huge issue in the scheme of things (we're certainly going to tell the baby that he or she came from a donor egg) but it just seemed one less thing to worry about.

From my perspective (a recipient of a donor egg) it's lovely to hear a possible donor's perspective. I don't want to feel that the woman who donated her eggs thinks of my baby as hers, and from what you've said this is unlikely. I'm eternally grateful to her of course, but the baby's mine!

Primmer

Heard from the fs yesterday that my referal for self-funded ivf has been faxed to the clinic and that I should hear from the clinic shortly with an invite to their next patient evening meeting where they explain about the clinic and the treatments available. Last night I was saying to DH how excited I was that things seemed to be progressing and that going to the meeting would make having ivf treatment more real - dh asked me whether I thought there would be tea and biscuits at the meeting - cue me disbelieving that this was his only concern :eek: - dh stating that for the money we will have to pay for the treatment, the least they could do was lay on tea and biscuits :rotfl:

fluffnutter

Primmer wrote: »

Heard from the fs yesterday that my referal for self-funded ivf has been faxed to the clinic and that I should hear from the clinic shortly with an invite to their next patient evening meeting where they explain about the clinic and the treatments available. Last night I was saying to DH how excited I was that things seemed to be progressing and that going to the meeting would make having ivf treatment more real - dh asked me whether I thought there would be tea and biscuits at the meeting - cue me disbelieving that this was his only concern :eek: - dh stating that for the money we will have to pay for the treatment, the least they could do was lay on tea and biscuits :rotfl:

We are married to the same man.

tea_lover

Primmer - that is exactly the sort of comment my OH would make. Although to be fair I'm usually thinking about biscuits too!

CD28 bloods this afternoon. Am pretty sure I ov'd on CD 22/23 so I should be ok for the hycosy on 30th May as if AF does show up this cycle it should be gone by then.

Already getting worried about work. Don't know what to say to them about the hycosy as it will mean another day off. Am thinking I may just book it as annual leave. Haven't broken the news to OH yet that he'll need to come with me for that one to drive me home. Really hope we can plan his SA for the same day.